Helen Longworth (Hannah Riley)
Hannah has been getting more of a part recently - at the beginning of the week, she was in the cricket team that lost to Darrington by three runs. PCB moaned because she dropped a catch before the Darrington opener had scored, but Alistair tells him to lighten up there are more important things in life than cricket. Even now, the MCC committee is marching on Ambridge, determined to lynch him with a noose made from MCC ties.
Johnny seems impressed too - not only does Hannah play cricket, but she drinks as well, which speaks volumes for what Johnny is looking for in a woman. However, if Johnny has designs on housemate Hannah, he could be in for a disappointment; let’s fast-forward to the end of the week, when Jazzer, Freddie, Hannah and Tom are sitting outside The Bull. Hannah moans that Neil is still having trouble understanding the spreadsheets about his pigs - “How can anyone be so slow to learn?” Just chuck some mud and pig muck over the PC, Hannah - he’ll soon pick it up.
But back to The Bull. Jazzer makes a tasteless joke about Freddie getting banged up next week and the others (except Freddie) tell him he’s out of order. A disgruntled Jazzer says they obviously don’t want his company, so he’ll go inside the pub. Tom offers to get a round in, but a dispirited Freddie says he’ll call it a night and goes back to the Stables. “He’s not in a good way” Hannah says, and adds that she’s got to go too, as she’s got a date. Tom is alarmed - this means that he will be buttonholed by Bert Fry, talking about the Flower & Produce show, but Hannah leaves.
Tom escapes early and returns home, where he sees Hannah dressed in her glad rags. “You look amazing” he says, and Hannah picks up on (and remarks on) the note of surprise in his voice. She explains that her date cancelled at the last moment and Tom says that he must be an idiot. He takes a call from Natasha and she says, in reply to Tom’s message, that she can’t meet him for a date. Hannah teases Tom, accusing him of fancying Natasha rotten, and he sheepishly admits that this is the case. Hannah suggests that they “embrace their tragic, lonely heart status by getting a takeaway.” Tom agrees, but the evening is not yet over - Hannah says that, even if Tom is carrying a torch for Natasha, this shouldn’t stop him having fun. Tom, who obviously cannot recognise a cue when it slaps him in the face, is puzzled. For example, explains Hannah, “there’s a girl not a million miles away from you who has had a disappointment and just might be feeling in the mood tonight.” Tom, slightly taken aback, mutters “Oh”. Hannah: “So how about it?”
Don’t you just hate it when these girls (or men, depending on your gender and sexual orientation) start playing hard to get? If the thrill is in the chase, rather than the capture, then Tom won’t be very happy - I’m surprised Hannah didn’t just bang him over the head and drag him back to her cave. I must admit that I lost track of where Johnny was, but I sincerely hope that he didn’t come back late at night and catch his fellow housemates in flagrante.
But Johnny could be a bit busy in the future, as at Bridge Farm, there is much talk about the possible new dairy herd. Tom, who seems to have embraced the idea after his initial objections, approaches Johnny about doing the milking. Johnny cannot understand why Tom has had the change of heart, but he realises that the other partners at Bridge Farm will be looking at Tom’s agro-forestry idea - “You scratch their back, they scratch yours” he says, knowingly. Don’t knock it kid; the milking will be a permanent job and you might need to be looking busy if there is a slump in turnover.
Sadly, Tom doesn’t realise that dad Tony hasn’t actually opened his report on agro-forestry, let alone read it. “Just give them time” advises Pat. Better get a move on - Tom is 37 and Tony is 67.
Let’s return to Jazzer - when he went off in a huff, it was remarked that he was in a bad mood. Back at the Stables, Alistair asks how is training going? Jazzer bites his head off and tells Alistair to back off. It transpires that Jazzer has given up smoking, after being given a lecture by Phil, who gave up his 30-a day habit when his child was born (Jazzer had just had a coughing fit). Phil says that all it takes is willpower, but Jazzer is finding it hard and has been short with everybody. Alistair tells Jazzer that he doesn’t have to keep running for his sake, but Jazzer says that he won’t let Alistair down and, in fact, he’s off for a run now. There is much talk about stupid Welshmen and we can assume that there is not an awful lot of Celtic harmony between the two.
The cricket season is over and the end-of-season party was held at the Tea Room, with Fallon adamant that, unless Kenton apologised for what he said about PCB and Freddie, The Bull is out of bounds. As it turns out, Jolene joins the party (Harrison persuaded her) but she has a measure of revenge, as she has brought along a Spice Girls CD and Harrison is encouraged to sing along (thankfully not in his Ginger Spice get-up).
Alistair tells Harrison that he has done a great job as captain and that he was only doing his duty when he arrested Freddie. In fact, Alistair seems to be very protective of Freddie and he invites him to the party, but Freddie refuses, saying that he is fine.
So let’s concentrate on the Pargetter family. We can quickly dispense with Lily, who hasn’t contacted Elizabeth since going to uni, from which we deduce that she doesn’t need money quite yet (call me Mr Cynical if you like). Her twin, however, seems to be facing up to the harsh realities of his immediate future and is slowly slipping downhill. Shula invites him to have a talk, but he declines.
I have never faced the prospect of possibly being banged up in the following week, but if I had, I think I would have spent the majority of the time either in the pub, or cradling my favourite bottles of whisky. Freddie however (apart from the less-than-successful episode at the pub - see paragraph three) is closeted in his room and is letting himself go. Alistair describes him as “the wild man of Borneo” and suggests that he needs a shave and a haircut. Freddie seems to realise that his appearance could do with smartening up and gets a haircut - he even removes his eyebrow piercing, which could perhaps be a major plank in the defence lawyer’s plea for mitigation; let’s face it, there isn’t much of a case.
Alistair continues to contact Freddie, asking for a talk and eventually. Alistair turns up at Freddie’s room at the Stables, approving that Fred has cleaned himself up. Is he ready for next week (the County Court hearing)? The short answer is ‘not really’ and Freddie confesses that, while everybody thinks he is ok, he isn’t really. He feels guilty about what he has put his mother through, including losing her alcohol licence, and that Nigel would be so ashamed of him. Alistair says rubbish and does he fancy a walk? Freddie says give him a moment and he, Alistair and Shula set off for Lakey Hill.
But where did Shula come from, I hear you scream? Well, ignoring the fact that Freddie said that he didn’t want to have a conversation, she knocked on Freddie’s door and entered (Alistair was in the room talking to Freddie). She stayed (Alistair and Freddie agreed readily) and Alistair asked if she wanted to join them on the walk to Lakey Hill? Shula agreed and the trio were sitting on the top of Lakey Hill, admiring the view. Freddie points out that they can see Lower Loxley and he misses it more than ever - especially now, when he cannot go back there.
He says that he has been stupid, selfish and now he’s going to jail, adding “This might be the last time I see this view for a long while - and there’s nothing I can do about it.” Well, look on the bright side Freddie - this time next week you will know your fate and where you are going to live will be decided for you, so it’s not all bad news.
You might be wondering why the apparent rapprochement between Alistair and Shula? While they were waiting for Freddie to join them on the walk, Alistair said that tearing themselves apart is stupid and they should sit down and make a list of things that he has done wrong, so that Shula can put forward the divorce petition - he wants to get things over quickly; their talk with Freddie has made him realise that some things are more important than their squabbles. Perhaps we should mention here that Alistair revealed to Phil that he has had an offer from a vet’s practice to buy him out, but that might be unkind.
Shula is surprised that Alistair is willing to shoulder the blame, but she thinks that accepting the blame is a good idea - except that she thinks that, as it was she who initiated the divorce, it should be her who takes responsibility and she should be the one to petition him. ‘Dear God’ I thought ’Please don’t let’s get involved in a “it’s my fault, no it’s mine” argument’ but fortunately the week ended.
We cannot leave without talking about Brian and Peggy’s Secret Squirrel’s attempts to prise secrets from villagers regarding their entries for the Flower & Produce show. They have been informing Jennifer about various tips for certain entries, seemingly unaware that people might find it suspicious if two people should enter hamster and avocado jam. Jenny lets it be known that she is perfectly aware of what Brian and Peggy have been doing, but Brian feigns innocence.
Jennifer says that she knows why Brian is doing this - it’s because it will be the last F&P show that she will experience in this house and this garden and she has made him a surprise - a gentleman’s buttonhole. Brian is blown away - he says she is bound to win with that, but Jennifer says that, even if she wins nothing, she will still have wonderful memories of the house and garden. Presumably she will have wiped her memory of events like the expensive clear up of the contamination, Brian bringing home his secret love child Ruairi, and Toby Fairbrother turning the swimming pool water purple just before bonking Jenny’s daughter Kate. Ah, Happy days!
No comments:
Post a Comment