Bonus Posting – Looking Back, Fondly

As the Archers celebrated its 70^th anniversary, we thought that we would indulge in some nostalgia and look back at some of the highlights of this blog. Of course, we cannot claim anything like the serial’s longevity, but the first posting of our weekly blog appeared on 15^th December 2009. It was entitled Wayne and Jim and the subject was a trip to France, returning on the Herald of Free Enterprise.

We have written before about how the idea to write the blog came about during an evening in the village pub (sadly not called The Bull – that would have stretched credibility to its limits) and I have to admit that strong drink had been taken. I expected that the idea would fizzle out after a month or two, but here we are, some eleven years and 596 – 597 if you count this Bonus Posting, episodes later, catering to our loyal readers; giving them their weekly fix of all things Ambridge. 

Just how many these readers actually number is impossible to say – I used to keep a tally of free hits, but then the running total mysteriously vanished, never to return. All I can say is that the total was approaching 400,000 a year ago and the weekly total was averaging just under 1,000 – not bad for something that has never been actively promoted, and whose readership has been spread by word of mouth and serendipitous encounters via the Internet.

That first episode, incidentally, totalled just 355 words, and the length has steadily increased; last week’s episode (A Gong For Lynda) was 1,986 words in length. One day I might sit down and add up the wordage, but at the moment, I have a life, thank you, although I must admit that, if we keep having lockdowns, it could happen.

Neil and I are always pleased to get feedback from our readers, as it is good to know that someone, somewhere is listening. In fact, we are receiving an increasing number of e-mails along the lines of ‘I used to listen to the Archers, but now I just read your blog’. Perhaps one week I might introduce a totally fictitious incident, similar to the plane crash on Emmerdale a few years – actually a lot of years – ago. But no – I couldn’t do that to Archers fans, tempting as it is to imagine the roll call of potential casualties. It was precisely to avoid such wholesale carnage that we invented the concept of The Pedalo Of Doom (Bonus Posting 10/3/2015) so that only four characters could be lost at any one time.

Having said that, characters disappear from time to time for no apparent reason. You will recall Darrell the plumber/tiler/handyman, who was last heard of living in a campervan at the Stables, and who vanished without trace. Not only him, as his two daughters never reappeared either. For such a close-knit community, many of the people who move away, stay away. Take for example Mike Tucker, who is a long-standing Ambridge inhabitant and was a member of the darts team, despite having only one eye. He, wife Vicky and daughter Bethany only moved to Birmingham, leaving son Roy in Ambridge, but do they ever return to visit? No. Does Mike drop into The Bull occasionally to see his mates and reminisce? Does he fishcakes!

Others who have been written out include Brenda and Lexi, while some characters just vanish without trace. Take, for instance, Dr Locke – in 2015 there was a potentially-interesting storyline where the two Archer sisters Shula and Elizabeth both appeared to have the hots for the physician. “Oh ho” I thought, as all kinds of scenarios (some purer than others) flashed across my mind. But what happened? I’ll tell you what happened – sod-all is what happened. And where is the doctor now? Your guess is as good as mine.

Some characters seem to exist in a kind of Shadowland – they are referred to every now and then, but never feature in a major story. In some cases, this is a blessing in disguise, and I for one would be happy if the voices of Wayne, Kathy, Jamie, James and Leonie never darkened our airwaves again. I appreciate that, with an ever-growing list of characters, and the policy of a maximum of seven speaking-characters an episode, not everybody can take a turn at the microphone, but when did you last hear from Hannah, Lee, Leonard, Fallon or Sergeant Burns? And, incidentally, as a copper who lives in Ambridge, why wasn’t the latter involved in the arrests of Philip Moss and Kirsty?

Others who have been silent for ages include Usha and Amy Franks (I was going to add Alan the vicar, but he reappeared this week with a virtual church service). Pat Archer has been noticeable by her vocal absence, as has Russ – but I could go on for ages…

Anyway, another big ‘thank you’ to all our readers and, if you have a favourite (or unfavourite) character, who is a) still alive and b) has mysteriously gone AWOL from our favourite soap, then by all means let us know. As I said earlier, Neil and I love getting feedback.

Take care and keep safe. Neil and Peter.

PS One thing I’d like to see/hear the back of is the Archers Sunday Omnibus theme tune. Don’t get me started!