You’re A Liability, Gavin

Lynda’s Birthday Present to Robert

Gavin has returned to Ambridge - presumably his mother couldn’t stand having him for more than a few days - and, as we saw in last week’s blog, he knocked 40% off the price of the Berrow Farm track-laying job and promised completion a week earlier; and this despite being one man short on the job.

Early in the week, Roy Tucker endeavours to deliver Lynda’s news to Blake that she forgives him for his part in the explosion. I say ‘endeavours’ because the meeting doesn’t go at all well and Blake becomes very agitated; he thinks that Roy is from the police and says that he’s already told everything he knows and to leave him alone. Blake threatens to call a nurse and keeps telling Roy to go. Roy is mystified at Blake’s attitude and eventually leaves.

So far, so harmless, but then Gavin turns up to see Blake, who lets slip that Roy has been to see him. Gavin is immediately worried and he is not very nice to Blake, warning him to continue to keep his mouth shut. Gavin then gets on to Philip and says “Dad, I’m at the hospital - I think we might have a problem.”

Next day, Gavin tells Philip that Kenzie (one of the two remaining workers - the other one is Jordan) keeps asking after Blake and Gavin is getting worried because he thinks that Roy is sniffing around. Philip tells Gavin to talk to Kenzie and make sure that he’s keeping it together. If you want my opinion, Phil, I think that Gavin is the weakest link in this chain and he’ll probably come up with a stupid solution, such as cutting the brake pipes on Roy’s car.

Gavin returns from visiting Kenzie and Jordan and says that he visited the flat where the pair are ensconced and he managed to bribe Kenzie with lager and ciggies. Jordan, it appears, is happy with just watching TV. Gavin is still worried and suggests a video link between Kenzie and Blake, with Gavin and Philip monitoring the conversation to check that nothing untoward or incriminating is said. Philip thinks this is a crackpot and complicated idea and is fraught with danger - what if Blake and Kenzie start discussing how the explosion was caused? 

To allay Gavin’s fears. Philip tells his son that Roy is a mate and not a secret policeman. Furthermore, if Roy found anything wrong, he’d tell Phil - and if not Phil, then he’d certainly tell Kirsty and she would mention it to Philip. The best course of action, Philip advises, is to do nothing and carry on as normal. “Just keep calm until all this blows over” Philip tells Gavin. He might have added ‘and don’t go to pieces, you snowflake’ but he didn’t.

As it happens, Roy runs into Philip at the shop. Roy wants to discuss Phil’s Stag Night, but Philip points out that it’s only the two of them and Alistair who know that he’s getting married, so it would be a very small affair. Besides, with all the aftermath of the explosion, he’s not really in the mood.

Roy asks how is the investigation going, to which Philip says that he’s not looking forward to the police interview - he’s worried that he might put his foot in it and make things worse for Blake. Roy reveals that he went to see Blake, and the latter’s attitude was strange - like he was scared. Phil is surprised at the visit - he didn’t know that Roy knew Blake very well. Roy says he doesn’t; he was just passing on Lynda’s message of forgiveness. Philip reckons that Blake was probably feeling guilty when he saw Roy with his scar, caused by the explosion, which is why he reacted as he did. Blake, Philip tells Roy, has asked him to tell the nurses that he doesn’t want to see visitors, so if there are any more messages for Blake, it’s probably best if they are given to Philip or Gavin. “We’ll make sure he gets them,” Philip adds, kindly.

While we’re on the subject of hospitals, let’s talk about Robert Snell’s latest faux pas. Lee, the karate instructor and physiotherapist, gets a telephone call from Robert. It seems that Lynda is being given a hard time by her present physiotherapist and Robert was wondering whether Lee would be willing to take Lynda on as a private patient? Lee points out that physio for a burns patient is a highly specialised field, but he would be happy to have a general chat with Lynda about the benefits of physio, which he does later that day.

So it is that, when Robert goes to see his wife that evening, he is met with a torrent of abuse. Lynda tells him about Lee’s visit and berates him for interfering in her treatment programme without consulting her. Robert says that Lynda moaned about how hard her physio was making her work, to which she replies that that’s the whole point of physiotherapy and, while she doesn’t actually call Robert a cretin, it was a damn close-run thing. 

As it is, she accuses him of treating her like a baby (again) and, in tears, she adds that, if that’s his idea of support, he may as well not bother to visit her at all. In fact, she orders him out of the ward and, still in tears, she tells him to go home and leave her alone. All in all, Robert me old mate, I think it is fair to say that this was not one of your better ideas and that you can wave bye-bye to any brownie points that you may have had, in the unlikely event that Lynda ever awarded you any in the past.

However, Lynda isn’t one to bear a grudge - well, actually she is, but not in this particular case - as Tuesday is Robert’s birthday. He has already had an unexpected (and, I would venture to suggest, extremely welcome) bonus present when Leonie rang to say that their car is playing up and she and James have had to turn back for home and won’t be able to make it up to Ambridge to help him celebrate. Robert, you are indeed a very lucky, lucky man. 

Robert is unwrapping his present from Lynda - she tells him that Kate bought it, and his birthday card and begs him not to open the card until he gets home, as it is not what she would have bought. Why she tells him this, I don’t know - I mean, it’s not like he thinks that she has slipped out specially to Underwood’s, is it? The present (which Kate bought at the hospital gift shop - glad you didn’t go to too much trouble, Kate) turns out to be a porcelain tiger, which Robert promises Lynda that he absolutely loves.

There is talk of love too in the Grundy household. Ed and Jazzer are making preparations for Keira’s ninth birthday party, when Emma comes over and asks Ed to go for a walk with her. She realises that she came very close to being injured, or worse, in the Grey Gables explosion and she has been re-evaluating her life. Ed admits that he behaved like a pillock in the past and he is now trying to focus on the future.

As they walk, Emma says that she no longer wants a divorce - she still loves Ed and wants them to be a proper family once more. “You are my soul mate” Emma tells him. Cue a touching scene of reconciliation and protestations of undying love, you might think (certainly, that was what I was expecting), but Ed is not so sure; “It’s just not on,” he tells Emma, adding that the reasons that they split up in the first place are still there and it would not work, long term.

It wouldn’t be fair on the kids if they got back together and then split up all over again - he couldn’t bear to put them all through that once more. Tracy keeps asking Emma if there’s any news on the romance front and Emma asks her to stop asking her, as Ed obviously is not interested. Tracy pooh-poohs this and says that the mistake Emma made was trying to change Ed - the only thing we can change is ourselves. If she wants Ed, she’s got to go for it. “Last week you took ‘no’ for an answer” Tracy tells her niece. “But what else could I have done?” Emma asks, but, having planted the seed, Tracy walks away without answering. I suspect that we have not heard the last about Emma and glass-no-so-much-as-being-half empty-as-smashed-to-pieces-and-the-drink-poured-away-Ed.

As we approach Easter weekend, there are things to celebrate. Firstly, Lynda’s consultant has said that Lynda may be well enough to be discharged and go home. Roy immediately interprets this as news that she will definitely be back in Ambridge and is telling everyone. She may even be well enough to be a judge in the Easter bonnet competition. In vain does Lynda point out that she hasn’t been given the go-ahead to leave hospital.

Robert is in a bit of a state - the house is in a mess and he wants everything to be perfect for his Lindy’s homecoming - how is he going to get a bed downstairs by himself? Lilian says that she will recruit some muscle and that Robert will not have to face this on his own. The Muscle, by the way, is Freddie, who is only too pleased to help Lynda out. He is being kept busy as, as well as his kitchen duties, he is being trained as a relief Receptionist while Lynda is away, plus auntie Shula has detailed him to sell raffle tickets for the Easter eggstravaganza. 

What else has been happening? Ed is getting inquiries about sheep shearing and is trying to get Jazzer to commit to help. Jazzer, however, is enjoying the feeling of power he has and keeps procrastinating before he will give a definitive answer.

Some more good news is that Grey Gables is re-opening. The Health Club is up and running, as is the Dining Room (the bedrooms were not affected by the blast). Granted, there is not yet a kitchen, but Hugh is having to make use of a catering truck. On the subject of cooking in adversity, I bet Ian is really glad that he is away on paternity leave at this time.

The re-opening day goes surprisingly well, with a good crowd turning up. Oliver has set aside some bubbly as a ‘thank you’ for the staff and Tracy seeks him out to say a few words of encouragement. She finds him in reflective mood and he says that he wishes he had Tracy’s zest and endless supply of positive energy. He adds wistfully: “Perhaps I can’t go back to who or what I was before - this might be it for me.” Tracy is more certain: “Nah, I don’t believe it.” She tells Oliver to talk to the staff, tell them it’s all going to be OK “and believe it when you say it - fake it till you make it, Oliver.” In her own inimitable way, Tracy is proving to be something of a philosopher, don’t you think?