Jakob - Man Of Mystery

Paul Venables (Jakob Hakansson)

Alistair met his new co-worker and equine expert last week. Jakob Hakansson is - to put it mildly - a tad reserved and taciturn; in fact having a conversation with him is like pulling teeth, with questions answered monosyllabically, if at all, and Alistair’s attempts to get to know more about his new colleague are doomed to failure. Alistair has heard about a Swedish custom, where workers bond over coffee and cake, so he buys some cake. Jakob reveals that he left Sweden years ago and, anyway, he doesn’t eat cake, thank you very much.

On Thursday, Alistair begs Jim to join him at the surgery for lunch - he’s desperate to get more than two words out of Jakob. At the surgery, Johnny phones Alistair because he is worried that the Montys have not yet calved. Jakob is mystified - what did Johnny hope to achieve by ringing the vet? What did he expect Alistair to do? Under his breath, Alistair mutters “Come on Dad, where are you?”

Alistair isn’t the only one to be frustrated by Jakob’s reticence, as Jakob asks Alistair “What’s wrong with the woman in your village shop?” The woman in question is Susan, so Alistair could be forgiven for saying ’would you like a list?’ Jakob continues to wonder why she needs to know his entire CV before she will sell him a pint of milk. “You have to make allowances” is Alistair’s advice. Smack her I say.

The reason for Jim’s absence is that he has been detained by an incident at The Stables - a horse has thrown its rider and is out of control. Shula is talking to Jim and Freddie runs over to give her the bad news, whereupon Shula tells him to go and get the vet, while she (and Jim) will look after the horse. Alistair and Jakob turn up and the horse has suffered an injury, the like of which neither Shula nor Alistair have seen before. Jakob has, however, and he handles the situation brilliantly - the horse should make a full recovery. The thrown rider was OK too, in case you were wondering.

As they stand around talking, Shula mentions Rosie’s christening. There is a bit of a crisis on the organ-playing front, with the danger that Valda (who she?) might have to come out of retirement, or be disinterred, I forget which. However, it looks as if Patrick might be able to juggle his commitments and play. Unexpectedly, Jakob shares that he used to play the organ in church and would welcome the chance to play again, so that’s one thing we know about Jakob that Susan doesn’t. Shula says that she will put Jakob’s offer to Alan for consideration. Alistair thinks he should buy Jakob a congratulatory drink later. “I have other plans for this evening” Jakob replies, reverting swiftly to type.

Shula resumes her conversation with Jim and it’s far from cordial. She wants to talk about her art project for the church, but, being an atheist, he is scathing and sceptical, dismissing it as “some sort of vanity project, or is it some kind of penance?” Shula protests that he should at least respect her beliefs, but he says “why should I, when you don’t?” and he reminds her that she broke her wedding vows, calling her “the worst kind of hypocrite” as she tells Alistair later. Perhaps unwisely, she asks Alistair if that’s what he thinks and he prevaricates and is non-committal.

Freddie is spending a lot of time at The Stables - he went out riding three times last week - and he tells Shula that it’s the exact opposite of being inside. Shula wants to introduce him to Francesca, a new stable girl, but he says best not, as she wouldn’t be interested in a jailbird. I don’t know, Freddie; some girls are attracted to a bit of rough. Having said that, I think that Freddie is as far away from being ’a bit of rough’ as it’s possible to get.

He is so pleased to be out of prison and vows that he’ll do whatever it takes never to go back. Spending the day with his mother, Freddie suggests that they go tenpin bowling, as they did just before he was banged up. They have a good time, but we learn that Elizabeth cancelled a session with her therapist, without telling Freddie. When Lily learns of this, she takes her brother to task. As caring and considerate as ever, Freddie tells her to lighten up.

Freddie continues to be scathing about Russ (or “your ancient boyfriend” as he tells his sister) but Russ is giving Elizabeth great support and encouragement. To digress here, wouldn’t it be great if Russ and Elizabeth got together? Imagine Freddie’s reaction if Russ became his stepfather. But back to reality - Elizabeth confides to Russ that she doesn’t feel as good as she thought she would when Freddie came home. Russ tells her that she is suffering from depression and she cannot expect to just snap out of it - there will be lots of ups and downs but he thinks she is making steady progress. 

There was a sticky moment for Russ in the shop, where Will was questioning him about being a teacher. Russ immediately goes on the defensive but it turns out that Will is just looking for someone to give stepdaughter Mia some additional maths tuition. Russ explains that his subject was art. Ruairi overheard this conversation and he offers to teach Mia. Will accepts and Ruairi turns out to be a good teacher. Mia enjoys the session and Ruairi offers to make it a weekly event, refusing Will’s offer to pay him for his time. Will says that he will donate the money to the ‘pay for a favour’ project.

In last week’s blog, we mentioned our reservations about Tim Oatey. He and Ed are installing a new, electric gate and Tim says that he has a proposition for Ed; a driving job that could pay good money. The money is apparently very good and Ed wonders why. Tim says that it involves delivering chemicals, such as fertiliser and the like and the wage reflects the fact that some of the jobs are at very short notice and it entails a lot of night work. Ed says that it seems a funny time to deliver chemicals and Tim reassures him that it’s not hookey - it’s just that some of the paperwork has been bypassed. Ed isn’t convinced and tells Tim that he doesn’t think it’s a job for him. Tim is disappointed and says that they had better get on with the gate.

Ed returns to Grange Farm, where he is greeted by an unhappy Emma - she went to The Lodge to clean for Peggy, who told her not to bother with the inside of the house, but gave her cleaning tasks outside. When Emma had finished, Peggy paid Emma and stunned her by saying that her cleaning services were no longer required, as Kate would be cleaning the house from now on and please close the gate behind you. Really? Kate? Cleaning? Good luck with that. Emma is very disgruntled at the way she was dismissed and it does seem a bit un-Peggy like.

Just then, Tim turns up and tells Ed that he has dropped off Ed’s toolbox with his dad. Ed says that surely he will need it when they finish off the gate job tomorrow, but Tim says that Ed won’t be needed; Tim will finish it by himself. He goes and Emma says never mind, Ed is sure to get more work from Tim later on. I hate to tell you this Emma and Ed, but I fear that this is the last you’ve seen of Tim. That’s two sources of income down the drain in one afternoon - how will this affect buying the affordable home?

At Bridge Farm, we have already mentioned how Johnny is getting twitchy about the pregnant Montys. Towards the end of the week, Tony makes the discovery that one of them has managed to calve without any outside help. Not only that, but there’s another beast where calving looks imminent. This one is having trouble and Johnny is on the verge of panicking. Tony tells him to calm down and that he can handle this. Johnny discovers that she is carrying twins and one is a breech birth - he manages to deliver the calf, following Tony’s instructions, but it’s not breathing. Tony tells him to clear the calf’s nostrils and it begins to breathe normally, making Johnny the happy father of two heifer calves. Johnny thanks Tony, but Tony says that Johnny did all the hard work “and I couldn’t be more proud” his grandfather adds.

Sunday will be the day of Rosie’s christening and there are still one or two small matters to sort out, not least of which is who will be the godparents? Pip asks Ben, but he says that he cannot do it - he doesn’t believe in God and doesn’t go to church (“and neither do you” he reminds his sister). And don’t get him started on religion. He accuses Pip of being a hypocrite and abandoning her principles. So that’s a ‘no’ then, Ben?

Towards the end of the week, Toby has some bad news, which he imparts to Pip and Josh - Ricardo (a prospective godfather) has to fly to Frankfurt right away. Josh is intrigued; who is Ricardo? When Toby says that he was someone he knew in the City and admits that Ricardo has never even seen Rosie, Josh takes umbrage - how could they choose a stranger over him?

Pip says that Josh has never shown any interest in Rosie and he leaves the room every time she cries. Josh retorts that he doesn’t like babies, but Rosie won’t be a baby forever, will she? And he stalks off. Later on, Toby (who, incidentally, is planning to make gin using Helen’s whey as a source for the base spirit - would you feel comfortable asking for a ‘milk gin’ in the pub?) seeks out Josh and apologises - neither he nor Pip realised how he felt. Toby asks him if he will be a godfather and Josh plays him along for a while, only agreeing when Toby says “Come on dude - don’t make me beg.”

“He’s agreed!” Toby shouts and there is a delighted yelp from Pip, who has been hiding nearby. She tells her brother how delighted and grateful she is. Pip then asks Toby if Jill was ok about Rosie’s name when he went to see her. Josh is mystified - what problem could there be with Rosie’s name? Pip starts to explain about the addition of Grace as a forename, but Toby, who hasn’t actually told Jill about it, cuts across her and Josh. “Jill’s fine” he reassures her hastily, adding “Everything’s fine - don’t worry.” Pip, who really ought to know better and who obviously hasn’t learned much about Toby from previous experience, smiles happily and says “You’re right - it looks like we’re all set for a perfect day.” Oh yeah, Pip; want to bet?