Susie Riddell (Tracy Horrobin)
When I say ‘some things’, I really meant ‘some people’, as on Thursday we had Tracy in the shop, buying cigarettes. As sister Susan reminded her, on New Year’s Eve, Tracy resolved to give up smoking. Tracy said that, when she made the Resolution, she meant it, but Bradley and Chelsea (her brats) are doing her head in and it’s either ciggies, or she’ll kill them. Oh yes, and give her a half bottle of vodka as well. Be fair - the Resolution lasted nearly 50 hours, which is probably the longest she has ever denied herself any of her numerous pleasures and, to be honest, we‘re not really surprised.
Jim Lloyd comes into the shop and he has Cecil Jackson’s vote for the best teller of the Canterbury Tales (the winner of the vote gets a dinner for two at Grey Gables). When Jim leaves, Tracy opens the vote and - surprise - it’s for Jim. Tracy suspects foul play and follows Jim. She spots him coming out of Mrs Chadwick’s house, saying that if she needs anything, be sure to get in touch.
Tracy intercepts the Prof and spots that he has another Canterbury Tales vote, and promptly accuses him of buttering up people to get them to vote for him. Jim denies the allegation and says that he is merely visiting those who have been laid low by the flu to see if they need anything, and, should they want to give him their vote to post…Indignantly, Jim says “If you are accusing me of an act of malfeasance, you are acting under a misapprehension.” You have to hand it to Tracy (and you wouldn’t be the first) as she knows her limitations, saying: “I haven’t got a clue what that means, but I know a cheat when I see one.”She offers to take Mrs Chadwick’s vote to the shop “to save you the walk”, but Jim points out that, as his house is adjacent to the shop, he thinks he can manage to deliver it himself.
We then have an interesting insight into the meaning of cheating, as, later on, Tracy finds out that Susan has a stash of unsold tickets (nominations have to be made on the back of a ticket from those who attended the performance) and Tracy says they can easily make sure that Susan tops the poll. Susan is scandalised at the thought and says that they cannot thwart the will of the people (“even if they are wrong”), which is strange, as she had just spent five minutes trying (unsuccessfully) to get Lily to vote for her as best tale teller.
Call me a tease, but I won’t reveal who won the coveted prize, but I will say that neither Jim nor Susan will be dining gratis at Grey Gables. Apparently Lilian, who could probably buy Grey Gables, is also desperate to win. All will be revealed later, if I remember.
At Bridge Farm, Tom has returned after spending the Festive Season with Natasha’s family. As Jenny drives Peggy to the Laurels to see Chris, Peggy says that she thinks Tom was hiding something when he returned. “I hope she’s not pregnant” Peg remarks. Well, they have been practising. Sticking with Peggy/Chris, Peggy tries again to get Chris to come back to the Lodge, but Chris says that she feels secure at the Laurels and she has an ideal solution - why don’t she and Peggy buy an assisted flat together at the Laurels. Peggy is not keen - actually she’s appalled - and turns her friend down.
True to form, back at Bridge Farm, Pat tries unsubtly to find out from Tom what’s going on. Tom counters by saying how much Natasha enjoyed her Christmas present bracelet, and how much it reminded Tom of the bracelet that Helen bought Pat a year or so back. Perhaps they could compare them to see? Pat prevaricates and Tom says, meaningfully, that “maybe there are things we’d both like to keep to ourselves. But don’t worry; it’s all good.”
I know you are all agog, but I can’t keep you in too much suspense - Tom and Natasha have both had identical tattoos, so Peggy will either be relieved or disappointed. We learn this when Tom tells Hannah, who is worried that things between Tom and Natasha are going ahead at breakneck speed. Let him get on with it, Hannah, says I.
Actually, Tom was a bit of an arse this week - he visited Lexi to return Adam’s phone, which he left in the Bridge Farm shop, and we know Lexi is staying with Adam and Ian (please keep up; there may be questions later) and she asks how is Roy? Tom replies that he’s in bits and is it surprising? (Roy told him about the surrogacy). Lexi isn’t best pleased that Roy has blown the gaff, and tells Tom that it’s none of his business. Tom says that Roy is his best friend and it is his business, to which Lexi says that she’d like him to leave. The parting shot from Tom is that he’s beginning to think that Roy has had a lucky escape. When Adam calls in later, Lexi tells him what happened; she’s worried that Tom will spread the news of the surrogacy, but Adam says that he will have a word with Tom and, besides, if the third (and final) embryo transfer isn’t successful, then it will all be academic.
At Home Farm (but not the farmhouse) Brian and Jenny are coming to terms with downsizing. In fact, Jenny gets a message from the agents - she has to go and drop off keys. This is when she is driving Peggy back from the Laurels and the pair of them enter the empty house (this is the day before NYE). Jenny says that she would like one last look at the kitchen (no doubt reflecting that the cost of the kitchen would have paid for the clean-up at Low Mead). She takes a last look and reflects on her life. It was here that Brian told her about him and Siobhan but, as she tells her mother in a voice breaking with emotion, she wouldn’t have changed anything in the past.
Brian moves into Adam’s new eco-office and immediately takes possession of the prime spot near the window and about 42,000 sq. ft. of filing space. Looking out of the window, he spots a van arriving at the farmhouse; it doesn’t look like a removal van, and in fact they begin unloading crates of champagne. A second van proves to be from a catering company and it looks like there is a party in the offing. The following day, Adam and Ruairi creep around outside the house and clear up empty bottles, broken glass, spilled food, etc. It looks like the new neighbours might be a bit on the lively side.
Lots of loose ends to clear up; at Lower Loxley, Russ is getting a tad fed up with being in Ambridge and encourages Lily to get packing so that they can get back to Manchester. He tells her that Ambridge is draining her and that she needs the stimulation of a big city. He calls her ‘a saint’ for looking after her mother, but she needs to escape the bubble of Ambridge. With pretentious claptrap like that, you fear that he could be the Christmas dramatic successor to Lynda Snell (God forbid).
Anyway, Lily says goodbye to her mother, who bursts into tears, and Lily and Russ set off. They get about 100 yards down the road and Lily yells “Stop!” and rushes back to her mum, saying that she just cannot leave her, as Lizzie isn’t well enough to be left on her own. Very touching, but one cannot help wondering what Russ’s reaction was when he got Lily on her own. Mind you, he should worry - he’s getting free board and lodging, not to mention the fact that Lizzie bought him a tank full of petrol.
From the touching to the definitely not sublime - at Grange Farm, Eddie is doing something with sheep, while Joe stands by, grumbling as usual. Suddenly, there is the sound of a lorry approaching; Eddie isn’t expecting a delivery, and he isn’t getting one, as we hear Clarrie giving the driver directions and instructions. What’s going on? What’s going, more like, and the answer is the portable toilet. Clarrie explains that she said it would go in the New Year and the lorry is here to take it away to a building site. Eddie and Joe ask why? “Because it’s an eyesore and stinks to high heaven” Clarrie explains, in a reasonable voice.
Joe is genuinely heartbroken and says he feels “quite emotional” and has become quite attached to the toilet. And this is the man who, when the Grundys were due to move to a housing estate some years ago, killed his pet ferrets with a hammer, as there was no room for them in the new home.
Apparently, his affection for the toilet is that it is the only place in the house where he can get any privacy, especially when he wants to go to the toilet. An odd family, the Grundys. Clarrie relents and tells him that he can have the downstairs toilet for his own, exclusive use. Furthermore, should he need to go during Cider Club meetings, she’s sure that there will be enough people to escort him to the house (can’t you imagine the people fighting for the privilege?) and he can have his own, personal golf umbrella. Joe is overcome with emotion - perhaps they should have got him a load of toilet rolls as a Christmas present. However, there is good news, as Eddie takes a phone call from Lynda - he has won the best tale teller in the Canterbury Tales poll; a free meal for two. Joe is pleased for them and tells them to enjoy themselves as “I’m spending the evening in my new, private convenience.”
Let’s end on a note of optimism, although the early build up wasn’t promising; Helen got glammed up for New Year’s Eve and went down to The Bull, hoping to see Lee, the karate instructor. He wasn’t there and Helen returned home about 11.30, disappointed. However, we listeners heard Lee turn up shortly after, but it was too late; Helen had left.
On Friday, the pair meet up at the Laurels - Helen is visiting Chris and Lee has a physiotherapy patient. She buys him a coffee as a reward for his efforts at Henry’s birthday party and the two of them are getting on ok. Lee then asks, tentatively, whether Henry’s dad was there on NYE and a flustered Helen says that he and Jack don’t get to see their fathers. She then gets up and leaves.
‘God, not another missed opportunity’ we all scream, but fortunately Lee runs after her and says that he’s sorry; it was none of his business and he was just making sure that there was no-one else in her life. Helen calls him a very nice man and kisses him. She is embarrassed and says that, since her ex, she couldn’t believe that… Lee is delighted, saying that he has wanted to do that since the first time he set eyes on Helen and the couple kiss again as the week ends. I wish them both well - Helen deserves some grown up love and affection, so let’s hope it develops positively.
No comments:
Post a Comment