Felicity Finch (Ruth Archer)
If you had to pick one person in the world to keep a piece of information quiet and not tell anyone anything, then it's a fair bet that Rooooth Archer would be well down the list. When it comes to resisting searching questions, the woman caves in faster than an igloo in a blast furnace. All Jill had to do was say "it's a nice day" and Rooooth was spilling the beans about the threat to the family.
Later on in the week, Adam says "hello" and Rooooth promptly breaks down and blows the gaff. Why not just take a full page ad in the Echo – or, if you really want the news to get around, tell Susan and Vicky? Amazingly, Rooooth then asks Adam if he will help her talk David out of testifying, which seems a bit rich to me. "Adam, you know those men that attacked you and left you to die? Well would you mind terribly asking my husband not to go to court so that they can get away with it? Thanks awfully."
Adam, nice person that he is, agonises to Ian, saying that if anything happened to one of the kids, he'd never forgive himself. Ian, who usually sees the best in everybody, is dead set against telling David to pull out, saying that the time when Adam was in a coma was the worst time of his life and "if these scumbags go free, they'll do it to someone else."
In the end, Jill persuades David to send the kids away to stay at Heather's and Rooooth takes them, reminding David to make sure he eats properly. Actually, she only takes Josh and Ben, as Pip is staying at Spencer's father's farm, thereby putting another family in jeopardy, not to mention Heather.
One of the few people who doesn't know what's going on is Eddie and, when he doesn't turn up for milking one day (he's out pricing a gardening job) David goes berserk and threatens that he'll never work at Brookfield again if he doesn't get there pretty damn quick. A bemused Eddie asks David why he can't cut him some slack? Just find Rooooth, Eddie and ask her what day it is – you'll have the whole story inside 10 seconds.
It seems that people are either convinced that something awful will happen, or they dismiss it all as idle threats – while we have Rooooth and kids fleeing for their lives, Ed tells Emma that he is going to have to go away, but don't worry – she and Keira will be fine, on their own in the cottage, in the yard at Brookfield and not to worry that the gang have already shot out the security lights once before. What can possibly go wrong? Emma is not convinced and wants to move out. I certainly hope this trial comes quickly, or else there won't be anyone left in Ambridge.
Over at Roy and Hayley's, we had an unsettling reminder of what to expect in coming weeks, when they are getting all excited about Phoebe's imminent homecoming and decide to decorate her room for her. Why bother? Whatever they do it's bound to be wrong and Phoebe will be moaning that she never had to do this, or put up with that when she was in South Africa. Even more depressing, one presumes that Kate will be returning too. Truly our cup runneth over.
I did have one glimmer of hope – as Hayley was talking about some deranged plan to put fairy lights round the headboard of Phoebe's bed, she said: "I can't wait to see her little face light up." "Oh good," I thought, "they're going to plug her into the mains." No such luck, but the glimmer remained when they all Skyped Phoebe on her birthday and, afterwards, Hayley said "Is it me or did Phoebes seem underwhelmed about coming home?" Good for you Phoebe – dig your heels in girl – they can't force you to come home. You and Kate stay in South Africa we're right behind you on this.
Vicky is going through one of her extra-annoying phases. As well as threatening to buy Phoebe a sofa decorated with hearts and teddies, she blithely informs Brenda that she has put her name forward to help with marketing the Fete/Olympics. Brenda's observation that she's rather busy and it would have been nice to have been asked is swept aside. Vicky also upsets most of the family when, while talking to Phoebe on Skype, Roy mentions a family holiday and Vicky immediately invites herself and Mike.
In recent weeks, Natalie's part seems to have been growing and she spends most of the time bemoaning the fact that there is no team of women for the ladies of Ambridge to play cricket against and how can they get a game against somebody? These questions are directed to Jamie, who has his own ideas about what sort of game he and Natalie should be playing, and it isn't cricket. Jamie comes up with a couple of good ideas (yes, I too was surprised) but, instead of leaping on him and showing how grateful she is, Natalie rushes off to try and organise something. You want to be careful Natalie, as Rosa (who Natalie described to Jamie as "your groupie") is attending the cricket matches and, if you don't pay Jamie the attention he wants, then I reckon Rosa will be only too willing to let Jamie introduce her to his googlies as he deals with her bouncers.