Tuesday, 4 October 2011

The Drugs Are Wearing Off…

Philip Molloy (Will Grundy)

What drugs are these? The ones that Will is obviously using to addle Nic's brain and causing her to utter protestations of dying love, but last week the worm started turning, or at least twitched a bit. Nic's ex, Andrew, has been giving her a difficult time and leaving bullying messages, as well as messing her about with not having the kids.

Will finds out and the red mist comes down yet again (Nic can certainly pick 'em, can't she?) and he says he's off to sort Andrew out. Nic says she couldn't bear it if Will's relationship with Andrew turns into a mirror of the Will/Ed situation. Will demonstrates yet again how out of touch he is with reality when he asks Nic what's the matter with his relationship with Ed? How long have you got Will?

Nic replies that he (Will) always starts off defensively and then gets angry and she's fed up with walking on eggshells all the time. Will, whose shoulder has more chips than a McCain's factory, still can't get his head round this and points out that they sent Ed a birthday card. "It would have been nice if you had signed it" says Nic, witheringly. The prosecution rests, m'lud.

Enough of Will. The Flower & Produce Show proved a triumph for Peggy, with her enamelling entry winning first prize. Bert Fry cleaned up on the vegetables and poor Joe Grundy won nothing. Too much Old Grumblebelly, Joe! It will soon be cider-making time again and we had the Grundys and assorted helpers picking the apples from Grange Farm's neglected orchard. Jim (the only helper with a speaking part) muses on whether it could be a worthwhile community project to resurrect the orchard. Joe has been thinking of ways of raising money and suggests to Clarrie that he could sell Bartleby. Clarrie says 'no'. Good call Clarrie – keep the horse and sell Joe.

Of course the F&P show attracted James and Leonie and I think even Lilian (she of the rose-tinted specs where her son is concerned) is getting a kittle cheesed off. I know I am. James and Leonie call Peggy 'Gran' and she complains to Tony that they make her feel "about 100". Only 13 years to go, Gran! There was one thing to thank them for, though, as they asked Lynda what this year's pantomime was going to be and we learned that this year the Christmas Show was going to be a concert, not a pantomime. Yes! Result!

The 'will she, won't she?' saga of whether Elona will take tenancy of No. 3 The Green finally came to an end, with Peggy using emotional blackmail on Lilian into giving Elona another chance and with Elona eventually agreeing to accept both the tenancy and the offer of helping Peggy round the house, as well as her job at The Laurels. At this rate, Elona will be lucky to see inside No. 3 very often.

Tony and Pat continue to be more and more depressed and things continue to go from bad to worse – this week they had the oil bill and they are running out of options, as well as money. They still don't feel they can worry Peggy at this time and Tony talks to Jennifer, telling her that they had been thinking of approaching Peggy. "We're falling further behind with our payments - we don't know where else to turn" Tony tells his sister, pausing hopefully. This less-than-subtle attempt at begging goes straight over Jennifer's head and she remarks "These are difficult times for everybody." Too right – after all, she could only afford to buy Alice two cashmere sweaters for her birthday. Chris gave Alice his own special birthday present, shortly after giving her a home-made candlestick.

As Pat and Tony sink slowly in the West, Tom is throwing himself into his footballing pigs. But he's got a problem – should he play a diamond formation with a big porker in the holding position, or go for a basic 4-3-3? Brenda is being all moody and miserable, to the extent that even Tom notices and asks what's wrong? It turns out that she feels irritated, having to answer the phone to James when he rings his mother. This isn't just the normal irritation we all feel with James, as Bren and James were once an item, till he chucked her. Remembering the romance, I was wondering which one to feel most sorry for, then I realised I dislike them both intensely, so it doesn't really matter.

Back at The Bull, Jolene lets it be known to Kenton that her offer to move in is still open. Kenton says that the time feels right and he will ask Lizzie? Ask her what? She's not your bloody mother, man! Anyway, the Lady of the Manor gives her blessing and Kenton says he will start moving in over the next few days. Jolene says "I feel like a teenager again" What? All spotty and surly? In the meantime, Kenton says that he has loads of stuff and books and tells Jolene: "You haven't seen my stack of vinyl yet". I really, really hope that wasn't a euphemism…

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