Tuesday 15 October 2019

Everybody Seems To Love Xander

Perdita Avery (Kate Madikane)

For a small bundle of joy, young Xander is having a profound effect on many inhabitants of Ambridge. Take Kate (please) – Ian goes ever so slightly spare when Adam tells him that Kate has taken Xander for a walk (and who could blame Ian?). Adam reminds him that Kate has much more experience of babies than the two men.

Be that as it may, Ian’s mind is not put at rest and he tracks Kate and Xander down to a yurt in Spiritual Home. Kate is besotted with her new nephew and Ian has a hard job to prise his son away from her. As Ian tells Adam later, Kate seems very broody, prompting Adam to observe that this could make things interesting for Jakob when he returns. Stop this storyline at once – the thought of Kate breeding again chills the blood.

Someone else who seems to be getting broody is Kirsty. She tells Philip that, even after her miscarriage, she always thought that she would have a child someday. There is a potential problem here, as Philip is around 60 and, as he tells Kirsty, he’s looking forward to having grandchildren and couldn’t countenance another child of his own. Despite this, the pair agree that they are happy as they are and should live for the moment – in fact, Philip suggests taking their wine upstairs.

It’s a good job that Philip doesn’t want a child, as the romantic moment is spoiled when neighbour Joy knocks on the door – all her electric has suddenly gone off and she doesn’t know what to do. Philip sorts it out and he and Kirsty are returning home when they realise that they have locked themselves out. Phil’s son has a spare set, but it will take him two hours to get there. To cap it all, it begins to rain and, with heavy heart, Kirsty and Phil ask Joy if they can come in for a bit. She is overjoyed and says enthusiastically “Come in, come in – let’s make a night of it.” Joy is rapidly moving ahead in ‘the most annoying neighbour’ stakes, but her constant popping round with cakes, or the latest tales of her granddaughter, should ensure that Phil and Kirsty remain childless.

Lexi went back to Bulgaria on Tuesday and Roy popped round to say his goodbyes. They talk about how things might have been and how they could have made a nice family. However, they agree that things have worked out for the best and they swear eternal friendship and Roy tells her that she is welcome in Ambridge any time and not to be a stranger. Speaking personally, I like Lexi and I hope that she does drop in every now and then, as it would be a pity if she vanished without trace – after all, she has played a big part in a number of lives and gave us Xander.

Toby is determined to get Boris the boar’s mojo working again and asks Kate if she can do anything for someone whose libido is flagging. Kate thinks he is talking about himself and starts banging on about essential oils and suchlike. When Toby reveals that he is talking about a pig, Kate is scandalised – she would never waste her talents on an animal, especially one whose job it is to produce more piglets that are destined for the slaughterhouse. Kate sends Toby away with a flea in his ear.

Undeterred, Tobes tries some DIY treatment. In practice, this means putting a lighted citronella candle (the only scented candle that the shop had) in Basil’s pen. A bit later, Rex notices that Basil is looking out of sorts and he asks Toby what has he done to Basil? It turns out that Toby gave Basil “a few apples” – when we say ‘a few’ we are talking half a sackful of cider apples and Rex realises that Basil is, in fact, one very drunk boar as the apples ferment inside him. Whatever, it seems to have done the trick, as Basil is now bonking anything that moves, and quite a few things that don’t.

Whether the Grundy’s cider has a similar effect, we will have to wait and see, as it’s pressing time. However, last week we learned that the press was missing a vital part and it looks like there will be no cider this season. Eddie is talking to Oliver, who makes a throwaway remark about the history behind the press and how it should be in a museum. A lightbulb goes off in Eddie’s head and next thing we know, Eddie and Edward have blagged their way into the hitherto-unknown exhibition of agricultural machinery on show at Lower Loxley.

Not only is there a cider press on show, but the part they want is exactly the right size and they enquire if they might have the part to rescue their cider-making. Elizabeth isn’t keen and tells them it is her job to protect and maintain the history of Ambridge and dismantling an exhibit goes against this.

It looks grim for the Grundys, but then Elizabeth says “To Hell with it!” and says that she has been wondering what Nigel would have wanted and came up with the answer that he would not have wanted a well-established rural tradition to come to an end, so they can have the part but she makes a condition – they have to film the press in operation so that visitors can see it working. The fact that Nigel was not averse to getting outside a pint or three of cider may have coloured Lizzie’s judgement – she was certainly moved by Eddie’s description of how much Joe was looking forward to this year’s pressing.

It is true that, according to those who were at the pressing later that evening, Joe seemed to be very happy and there was a glint in his eye and a smile on his face. The meeting turns into a bit of as party, with Lilian having ‘liberated’ some trays of sandwiches earmarked for a Damara corporate function. It was certainly a bit much for Joe, who went home early.

Eddie, Will and Ed are the last to leave and creep home, saying ‘goodnight’ to each other in hushed tones. Eddie notices that Joe’s light is still on and goes to see if his father is OK. Joe has died in his sleep, clutching the photograph of his wife Susan and Eddie sits and talks to him, saying that they were never as tactile as Will and Ed are with their children and, begging his dad’s pardon for this one time, Eddie kisses Joe on the forehead as he says his goodbyes. And so an era comes to an end for the Grundys.

Over at Lower Loxley, Ruairi seeks out Elizabeth for some information. He was sorting through some stuff and came across a photograph of his mother Siobhan. He realises that he knows very little about her, as she died young and, because Ruairi is Siobhan and Brian’s illegitimate child, she is never mentioned by Brian or Jennifer. Ruairi stresses that Jennifer did a wonderful thing in accepting Ruairi as her own child, but he would like to know more about his mother and he has heard that Siobhan and Elizabeth were the best of friends – indeed, Elizabeth and Siobhan are together in the photo that Ruairi found.

Elizabeth confirms this fact and asks Ruairi if he would like to pop over from time to time and they agree to look at Lizzie’s photographs and share her memories.

Life at Grange Farm will seem very strange for the Grundys with Joe gone and they keep saying how they cannot get their heads round the fact that he’s no longer there. Clarrie has a moment of panic when she cannot find Will and she realises that he has gone for a walk down by the river – what might he do in his present frame of mind?


Ed offers to help her look for him and they find him feeding Joe’s ferrets. Later on, the three male Grundys are in the field, tending to Bartleby and Gem. As they talk of their memories of Joe, they agree that they will keep the horses. Will is troubled – how is he going to explain to Poppy what has happened to her great grandfather – he can hardly believe it himself?

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