Monday, 17 August 2015

Bonus Posting - The Pied Piper Of Ambridge (And Other Comments)

It seemed a good time to take a look at some of the comments that readers have been kind enough to send in recently. First up is one from Zoe, who says:

Has the Pied Piper of Ambridge struck again?  It seems ages since we've heard (rather than 'heard of') Johnny, Josh and Ben, Freddie and Lily, Jamie, Ruairi, the awful George, Jake and Mia. –Zoe

Quite frankly, looking at Zoe’s list, I reckon the Pied Piper has done a terrific job – whatever he charged, it was worth it. But it’s not just the children that have gone awol – we have commented on more than one occasion that Darrell just seems to have been written out and disappeared without trace. At least when Matt left (or was pushed) there was a covering story that he had legged it to Costa Rica, but as far as Darrell is concerned, it is as if he never existed.

There are a number of other absentees too – it has been months since we heard from Wayne, and long may it continue, plus Kathy has been quiet recently. As for Will, the strain of being nice to Ed at the latter’s marriage and of letting him and Emma have the house on the Green at a reasonable rent must have been too much for him and he has had to lie down in a darkened room for a few months. Whatever the reason, we haven’t heard from him for a while.

Christine is doing her usual trick of being referred to, without actually appearing, although one assumes that, if she and Jim go to the Italian-speaking dinner party at Caroline and Oliver’s, she’ll have to say something.

Much the same is happening to Jazzer, with Toby referring a couple of times to things that Jazzer had said in the pub, without us actually hearing from the man himself. PC Burns is another who has been conspicuous by his absence – perhaps he’s under cover somewhere? Neil too hasn’t had much of a speaking part recently, although, being married to Susan, he’s probably used to not being able to get a word in edgeways.

No doubt you have your own favourites who appear to have gone walkabout, or those that you’d like to send on a long trip somewhere. Presumably it won’t be long before Pip vanishes for a few months, unless Toby Fairbrother’s lascivious ambitions are realised.

Comment number two comes from Phil, and it concerns Rob Titchener. Phil asks:

Are there betting odds on which of the different possible ways that Rob will crash and burn will hit first? So far we have:

- Jess's baby (he hasn't told the truth about the paternity test);
- The blocked drain;
- The cooked books;

Have I missed anything? And who gets to deliver the coup-de-grace, or does he ever more improbably escape detection? Given that the man is now doing everything apart from skulking around Ambridge in a black cloak and hissing "a-ha!" like a pantomime villain, even the preternaturally dense inhabitants of Borsetshire must have noticed something's not quite right with the man. – Phil

Yes, there’s something of the Jekyll and Hyde about Rob – he can be very charming and then exhibit a nasty turn of temper. When under pressure from Charlie, he was snappy with Henry and Helen when he returned home. OK, I agree with him that it wasn’t very professional of Helen to take Henry and biscuits to see him while at work, but it wasn’t that big a deal – even Charlie laughed it off.

Surely he will get his come-uppance one day (we have said before that nobody usually gets away with a bad deed in Ambridge)? The question is, will that be before he has talked Helen into having his baby? If he is forced to leave Ambridge, will Helen go with him? Even more important, who will replace him in the cricket team? I suspect that, if Charlie keeps turning the screw and Rob feels the net closing in on him, Rob’s flashes of anger and bad temper will become more frequent. Will the scales fall from Helen’s love-besotted eyes? I reckon Rob would have to beat her up for that to happen, and even then, she’d say it was her own fault. We await developments with interest.

Our third comment, from Mr/Ms Anonymous is in more serious vein and concerns Kenton:

Not a light comment - but Kenton is showing classical signs of depression, and hopefully someone picks up on the not-very-subtle mention of suicide. It's just not true that those who talk about it never attempt it, sadly.

I know that Kenton has done his level best to alienate seemingly every member of his family in recent weeks, but surely Jolene could appeal to somebody in the extensive Archer clan for help, couldn’t she?

Thanks for your comments – it’s always good to get feedback and to know that the blog is being read and, hopefully, enjoyed!


  1. Yes - you've forgotten Rob's assault on the hunt saboteur

    1. Fair cop - forgot that one. Maybe he blocked the drains *with* the hunt saboteur? - Phil

  2. DGoing by past comments, there are many like me who wait for the next installment of your incisive and witty comments with anticipation every Sunday.  I am currently listening to old episodes of the Archers, going back to 2009 (downloaded from, which are even more enjoyable when read in conjunction with your blog. Please keep it up! - Zoe

  3. Yes, just to add to the thanks for running your blog - I never really fall behind with listening to episodes at all and yet I still always really enjoy reading your recaps! Can you imagine if we really did have the pleasure of consistently keeping up with all of the characters - each episode would have to be at least a couple of hours long!
    Jumping the gun on this week's synopsis - oh Lord, poor, poor Jill!

  4. I think Rob RAPED Helen that night. His bullying personality is now finding verbal abuse and manipulation is not enough. The bruise Tom mentioned on Helen's wrist seems to me evidence of Rob having turned to physical abuse now. Helen is a wimp - how did she get to be this way? oh, I know she suffered trauma when John died in the tractor accident, and then Greg killing himself didn't help either, but with a mother like Pat, you'd think she'd have a backbone. I hope dearly that Rob gets his just desserts over Jess, if the baby was indeed his, (what idiot would take HIS word that it wasn't?), and also that Charlie follows up the so far abortive investigation into that blocked drain and the cock-up in the farm records. If Helen isn't careful, she'll spend ALL the cash from Peggy on Rob and his selfish schemes, and end up losing the farm shop during a marital break-up that will surely finish her off completely. If she doesn't return to her anorexic state, her mental health will be so bad she'll end up in a psych ward. Pat's ability to assess people is also pretty feeble, she should have stuck with her first impression of Rob, whom in my view she only likes and considers an "asset" to the family now because she is so relieved Helen is at last settled and happy. THAT dream is about to be smashed big time over the next few weeks/months. Helen will end up standing on her parents' doorstep bruised, battered and tearful one day, and confess Rob has raped her and is regularly physically abusive, you mark my words. It will drag on and on if Helen does find she's pregnant….she won't want a) to admit she has once again chosen the wrong man and b) to "misjudge" Rob, despite his abusive behaviour. Also, if she DOES find she is pregnant, she will be loth to leave him, and ditch her dreams of a "happy" family. If she does (and she will eventually have to) leave, she will be a mental wreck…she's well on the way to that now, continually failing to identify his manipulative behaviour (and now, as I think his physical abuse of her) for what it is. Who taught her to think so little of herself? Did she learn that from her dad?

  5. Rob will get his comeuppance sooner or later. Maybe Helen is carrying a little homosexual Titchener in her tummy. Adam and Ian can be godparents hahah.