tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-52399612725033021632024-03-13T01:27:51.727+00:00The Ha ArchersNeilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.comBlogger641125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-23791417809810532552021-11-21T10:11:00.000+00:002021-11-21T10:11:14.539+00:00So Long, And Thanks For All The Silage.<p><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Without going into details, an unexpected illness has forced us to close the barn doors for the final time. Everyone’s ok and on the mend but it has been difficult over the past few months to keep the momentum going.</span><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;"> </span></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We would like to thank our readers for staying the course, your kind comments and, of course the generous donations of silage that were greatly appreciated. This was always just an amusing diversion borne from years listening to The Archers, and an opportunity to occasionally vent our frustrations at the storylines and characters, and we were more than a little surprised to find that others shared our views. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">You have all been great and we’ll miss your witty and supportive comments. The blog will remain dormant but available for the continued amusement of future generations.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Take care,</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Neil and Peter.</p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-5354223505299561962021-11-05T12:34:00.001+00:002021-11-05T12:44:31.436+00:00Out For 85<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tgA4LbDApYU/YYUkkvFTnoI/AAAAAAAACuY/LiMuRcoC2iUBBQRIwX8mXn1hUHaNeVL9wCLcBGAsYHQ/s300/Unknown-2%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="168" data-original-width="300" height="168" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tgA4LbDApYU/YYUkkvFTnoI/AAAAAAAACuY/LiMuRcoC2iUBBQRIwX8mXn1hUHaNeVL9wCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-2%2B2.jpeg" width="300" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 13px;">Eric Allen (Bert Fry)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It’s harvest suppertime in Brookfield’s barn and Jill’s making the last minute preparations, which mainly consists of strategising how to cut off Bert Fry when his planned poetry readings starts to go on too long (I expect her cue will be when the guests start face planting into their pavlovas). Bert’s printed off some copies of his poems, which mainly consists of punning on Houseman - for ‘blue remembered hills’ think ‘blue remembered pills’, you get the idea - and David and Kenton thinks it’s hilarious. Jill kicks off proceeding with and introductory speech which, of course, sets just the right tone as well as saving the assembled villagers from David and Kenton’s ‘comedy’ routines.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Bert becomes a bit of an inspiration for Ben as he’s deciding on his options for his training and is leaning towards elderly care. Roooooth’s coincidentally taking Bert out for a drink in The Bull later to thank him for helping to clear up after the harvest supper and she suggests that Ben tags along. In the pub Jolene’s effusive about Bert’s performance and makes him an extra special supper - cheese and pickle sandwiches with a pickled egg on the side. So enthusiastic is she about Bert’s poems that she wants to set them to music (please, dear god, no).</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ben and Bert get on famously, reminiscing about all Bert’s highlights from his years in Ambridge. He even teaches Ben to play Crib until he loses then nods off, allegedly so he can’t be beaten again. We don’t actually hear from the man himself though, because although Bert seems to be cropping up in every storyline this week, we never hear from the man himself. And we never will now because, dear listeners, Bert has just played the game hole, not just of Crib but of life itself. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It’s hard to imagine a more suitable passing for Bert. Fresh from being applauded at the harvest supper for his poetry, he had a bellyful of free beer and sandwiches in the Bull and after an evening playing Crib he just fell asleep there and then. Apparently Roooooth and Jolene took turns with CPR (I’m glad we didn’t hear that bit, it would have been insensitive) but it was too late for the 85 year old Bert. My money’s on the pickled eggs though - better check that best-before date Jolene.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">For someone who wants to work with the elderly it seems surprising that Ben seems to be in denial about being there when Bert died, or indeed his death full stop - “it happens” is his response when Beth tries to talk to him about it. She’s annoyed that he doesn’t seem to feel anything about losing a man he’s known all his life, but - and Ben does sound very upset at this point - he tells her that he doesn’t want to talk about it. What he’s in fact struggling with is the feelings of doubt that now consume him about his chosen career path - what if he’s not up to it after all.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Of course Rex is devastated. He moved in with Bert some time ago and is just glad that he went to the harvest supper and was there for Bert’s final poetry reading. Bert’s son Trevor is on his way down and Rex needs to make sure the bungalow is ship-shape, including Bert’s room. He needn’t have worried though as Bert has left everything neat and tidy. Trevor’s asked Rex to find some things of his Dad’s; a book on Borsetshire folk tales, a picture of Freda and a cricket scorecard for a 1985 match between Ambridge and Penny Hassett - B Fry, 44 not out. They also find a saucer with 3 matching cufflinks in it! Did Bert Fry have Polymelia (and if so why didn’t we know, and where did he buy his shirts) or did Lynda Snell once put on a version of Edward Albee’s play The Man Who Had Three Arms, with Bert in the starring role? We may never know.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Tony’s the first one to encounter Trevor as Rex is out buying biscuits for his imminent arrival (who on earth doesn’t always have a packet of biscuits in the cupboard? I’m sure Bert would have been an avid biscuit eater - I had him down as a Rich Tea man, with perhaps the odd Fig Roll for funtional reasons. Or perhaps he went off biscuits after Freda died and wasn’t able to enjoy any more of her Victorian Fairings). Trevor’s quite the talker and accomplishes the rare feat for boring the pants off Tony - Trevors detailed rundown of his train journey down, and recital of the timetable for trains from Hollerton Junction beats Tony’s tales from the potato harvest hands down. He’s having such a great time reminiscing about his dad and Ambridge that he decides to stay a few more days so that he can see more of the village.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">He makes his way to the Bull with Rex and he takes some of his dad’s old photographs with him. Eddie’s chuffed to see pictures of Bert and Joe together and calls them “the Federer and Nadal of flower and produce”. (I’d have thought Statler and Waldorf, the two cantankerous old men from the muppets, would have been more fitting). But the rivalry of the two village stalwarts seems to have been passed down to their sons as Trevor and Eddie spar over how to refer to the pair - Fry and Grundy or Grundy and Fry. One thing Eddie does know is that Trevor “could bore the backside off a dead rabbit”, presumably once he’d finished with all the donkeys.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Eddie’s drawn up a rota so they all share the pain of being talked at, for 15 minutes at a time, and to use a safe word ‘Badger’ when they need to bail out. Leonard takes the first leg (welcome back Leonard) and Trevor progresses devastatingly through the rota until he arrives at Tony. After an extended monologue about trying to by a sandwich on Strasbourg station Tony panics and repeatedly shouts “BADGER”. No-one picks up on this and Tony is left looking like he’s got omnivore-themed Tourettes. Leonard wanders over to ask him everything’s ok and gets roped in again. Eddie meanwhile thinks his plan’s gone really well but Jolene’s not happy, not happy at all, as Trevor’s emptied the place. Afterwards Rex and Trevor walk back to the bungalow but there’s no let-up. It’s a dark and starry night and Trevor starts going through the constellations but Rex politely cuts him short. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The mood changes and in a touching gesture Trevor offers him Bert’s old poetry notebooks and tells him that Bert thought of him as a second son and was really proud of him. The way he says it though makes me wonder whether Bert actually said the same to his actual son, Trevor.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">This week was dominated by Bert’s death but rather than end on a sad note I thought I would publish his beloved wife Freda’s recipe for Victorian Fairings which I’ve copied from the Jennifer Aldridge’s Archers Cookbook by Angela Piper. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">115g margarine or butter</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">1 tbsp golden syrup</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">85g brown sugar</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">170g self-raising flour</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">½ tsp bicarbonate of soda</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">1 tsp ground ginger</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">½ tsp ground mixed spice</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Melt the butter and syrup in a pan over a low heat and stir in the sugar. Remove from the heat and add the sieved flour, soda, spices and salt. Mix until a soft and smooth dough is formed.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Take rounded teaspoons of the mixture, roll into balls and place on greased baking trays, leaving room for the biscuits to spread.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Bake at 350°F/180°C/Gas 4 for 10-15 minutes before removing to a wire rack to cool.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Makes about 24</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-53168048530549977562021-10-28T18:50:00.000+01:002021-10-28T18:50:13.809+01:00The Monster Of Berrow Farm<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6XLixc-n0Z8/YXripvcojwI/AAAAAAAACuQ/dSahi9R2R-kFOqoVvWaCEM5o96Wb9hg7ACLcBGAsYHQ/s168/Unknown-1%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="168" data-original-width="168" height="168" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6XLixc-n0Z8/YXripvcojwI/AAAAAAAACuQ/dSahi9R2R-kFOqoVvWaCEM5o96Wb9hg7ACLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-1%2B2.jpeg" width="168" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Jon Glover (Martyn Gibson)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">After last week’s shaky start between Brookfield and Brian’s new farm manager Stella, we find Roooooth showing her around, and things sound a bit more cordial. Stella wants to agree in advance what fields Brookfield’s sheep will be grazing and when, so there are no ‘communication problems’ in future. The two are getting on famously and settle down over a pot of tea and Roooooth suggests that Stella come to the harvest supper, which Brookfield are hosting, where she will be able to meet the whole village.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The harvest supper is only a week away and David and brother Kenton are going over the details in The Bull. Jazzer joins them as they start to go through the running order but there’s a hitch right at the start - an argument about who’s going to compere the evening. As it’s taking place in David’s barn he wants to do it, but then Kenton’s the traditional go-to-guy for that sort of thing. Poor Jazzer has to referee but diplomatically suggests they do a double act, preparing their routines separately before comparing notes.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It turns out that you can kid a kidder because neither of them can come up with any decent material but each kids the other that they have prepared something brilliant. Kenton seeks advice from Bert Fry, who doesn’t laugh at his jokes, and David goes to see Lynda, who tells him that his script is terrible. In the end they’re rescued by their mother when Peggy suggests that she do the introduction as she’s touched that it is Brookfield where everyone will come together again.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Speaking of coming together, Shula’s been thinking about Lilian’s offer to invest in the stables and has decided that she’d like to give it a go. Lilian’s overjoyed when Shula pops round early to give her the news, with her only disappointment being that it’s too early to open a bottle of fizz. Just how early is it? The thought that Lilian doesn’t always have a bottle on the go is one that’s never crossed my mind. Anyway, Shula has some red lines - she needs to maintain control, earn a reasonable salary and above all the spirit of the business mustn’t change. Oh yes the other thing is that Justin, who at this stage is unaware of the proposed partnership, has to agree.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">They wake Justin from a snooze and naturally he’s a tad grumpy saying that there’s no way he’s going to take on “a bunch of excitable children and ponies”. In defence Shula’s pressurised into giving an impromptu sales pitch which, in the best traditions of Dragons’ Den, is simultaneously unimpressive and ill thought through. Shula leaves angrily and Lilian is incandescent at Justin, but all may not be lost as he thinks there’s a germ of an idea, if only Shula could see the bigger picture. Rather than discuss this, Justin goes round to the stable surreptitiously scoping the place out, asking questions and taking photographs. Of course Shula’s not happy at this underhand approach and not only wants an explanation but decides to withdraw from any partnership that might be in the offing. “I’ll swing for that man” exclaims Lilian, and she resolves to get to the bottom of it.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Lilian persuades Shula to meet up with her again in The Bull. Lilian gets the Gin and Tonics in (of course) before telling Shula what Justin’s up to, which is actually quite a lot. He wants to pull down the stable blocks and replace them with an American-style ‘complex’ for elite competition horse jumping and dressage training plus an exclusive members-only clubhouse. I don’t think that’s the last we’ll hear of this as I suspect that Justin will be like a dog with a bone now he’s had the idea.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">At Bridge Farm the realities of Bexit are beginning to hit home. There’s a shortage of labour to pick the apples which are in danger of spoiling if they can’t resolve the situation soon. They could always be turned into juice but Tom’s promised his customers apples in peak condition, and after the apples the potatoes will need to be harvested, and you can’t have veg boxes without potatoes. There’s more problems when the Bridge Fresh online store goes down, diverting Tom from the vital task of harvesting the apples, and then torrential rain forces the whole team to finish early. If only there were some unexpectedly available enthusiastic local fruit pickers that could help …</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over at Grey Gables Adam turns up just as Ian’s getting ready for lunch service. He’s not come to find out what the soup of the day is, but rather to offload the fact that he’s just walked out of his job after an argument with his boss, Christian. I have to say that Ian takes it rather well considering all the hassle he’s been put through with Adam changing jobs in the first place, but as Ian says, he’s done it himself before now so understands where Adam’s coming from. However, his failure to tell his mother with such promptness lands him in hot water when word reaches her that he’s quit.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jennifer hears it from Tom after Tony sees Adam unexpectedly out shopping during the week. But it’s not just the fact that he’s left his new shiny managerial role without saying anything that upsets her, it’s that he’s supposedly degrading himself by picking apples for Tony. She wants him to return to Home Farm but he’s so adamant that he won’t go back that Jenny thinks it must be because Brian forced him out. In order to convince her otherwise her’s forced to tell her that it was his own stupid fault by secretly ‘borrowing’ money out of the Home Farm account, and as you can imagine she’s not impressed. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I continue to be impressed with Jazzer though, as he’s had another success with Blake in persuading him to move back into the hostel, a good base from which to start his new job at Berrow Farm. Blake finds the size of Berrow a bit daunting, but Jazzer’s support gives him the confidence he needs to start with some small jobs. He starts with strimming the verges but loses concentration and thinks he’s broken the strimmer and will be punished. Jazzer fixes it with a new strand of wire and reassures him that there’ll be no punishment, but we get a small insight into the world Blake’s been inhabiting where the slightest mistake by one person could result in the whole gang getting a beating or going hungry. It is probably Philip and Gavin’s only redeeming feature that they didn’t treat their slaves as badly.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">However, it seems I might have been speaking too soon last week when I started to believe Martyn Gibson’s own description of himself as “I’m not a monster”. Turns out that he is indeed a monster and it looks like the whole ‘let’s take Blake under our wing’ thing was a stunt designed to get good press for himself and Berrow Farm. He invites a reporter from The Echo to the farm to interview Blake but it goes horribly wrong when the reporter tries to get an angle on Philip and Gavin, and Blake's only rescued when Jazzer notices what’s going on. Jazzer kicks the reporter out and gives Martyn a mouthful, telling him that he’s no better than Blake’s old slave masters, forcing him to do something he didn’t want to do. This sends Blake back to square one emotionally, saying the only people he trusts are Philip and Gavin and he’s determined to clear their names. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I think it might be time for someone else to get involved in Blake’s rehabilitation. A couple of years ago Elizabeth successfully sought the help of a therapist in treating her depression - I wonder if she still has their number? Sounds to me like Blake could use a good therapist to treat the classic case of Stockholm Syndrome he’s acquired. <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></p><div><br /></div>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-73537035334992974042021-10-22T14:25:00.001+01:002021-10-22T14:25:30.338+01:00Borset Barnet Barbers Bankrupt<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cUHdSUR0n50/YXK7XuL1rcI/AAAAAAAACuI/acExXVw8jowLOWGinjlza4Xp8IoH3GAcQCLcBGAsYHQ/s266/Unknown.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="266" data-original-width="189" height="266" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cUHdSUR0n50/YXK7XuL1rcI/AAAAAAAACuI/acExXVw8jowLOWGinjlza4Xp8IoH3GAcQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown.jpeg" width="189" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Andonis James Anthony (Russ Jones)</b></div><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Realising he’s still overdrawn on brownie points, Jazzer plans to take drastic action by selling his beloved bike in the hope that Chelsea’s interest in two wheels abates. He goes to see ‘God Squad’ Alan Franks to see if he knows of anyone who would want it, but Alan’s interested himself as it’s exactly the same model and colour of bike he bought after first passing his test.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Amy’s not impressed, and neither is Usha, but Alan wants to buy it for sentimental reasons. The only spanner in the works is the reason Jazzer’s selling it in the first place - Chelsea. After Johnny offers to help with her English (he’s also dyslexic) they agree to meet after school, but Chelsea thinks this is some kind of date and dresses up. She wants to arrive ‘in style’ and asks Jazzer to take her there on the bike but he insists on her putting on leathers and changing her footwear, and of course has to wear a helmet. However Johnny makes it clear that he’s not keen on bikes or ‘biker chicks’ and the final straw is when he laughs at her helmet hair. With Johnny and Jazzer’s laughter ringing in her ears she storms out and walks home. With Chelsea now off bikes all that’s left is for Jazzer to break the bad news to Alan, who’s already joined the owners’ club in anticipation.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">A chance encounter with Lily presents Chelsea with another opportunity to brush up on her English and help complete an essay she’s been struggling with. She invites herself round and, interrupting Russ’s dinner, launches straight into an animated replay of the saga over Jazzer’s bike. Once Chelsea’s finally paused for breath Lily starts being ever so formal about the theory of English composition. Russ, who’s been silently listening to the story, interrupts to say that Chelsea’s shown that she has creative energy that shouldn’t be stifled. Lily politely tells Russ to butt out as having two teachers will confuse the poor girl. Quite right, he agrees, and suggests that Chelsea chooses whom her teacher should be. She doesn’t hesitate to say that Russ should, he being an actual former teacher, whereas Lily “just sells kitchens”.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">He has quite the task on his hands and starts with the difference between ‘their’, ‘there’ and ‘they’re’. How to repay him? Offer to cut his hair of course as Russ’s usual place, Borset Barnet, has closed down. Lily’s looking forward to the humiliation and Russ finds the experience excruciating if not frightening, in fear of keeping both his ears attached. However not only does Russ retain his ability to wear glasses, he is audibly shocked to discover that his new haircut is really rather good. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Someone else who turns out to be rather good is Blake who is quite the craftsman, turning Jazzer’s abortive efforts into a fine set of shelves in no time, even cleaning up after himself. Jazzer manages to find more jobs that need doing around the house, and they plan to carry on tomorrow after a visit to the builders merchants. Once they get talking Alistair discovers that Blake is very fond of animals and they swap stories over sandwiches. Alistair wants to pay Blake for his work, but the concept of wages eludes Blake as Philip never actually paid him, only providing basic food and accommodation. Alistair gives him the money and he’s very grateful, if a little overawed. Both Alistair and Jazzer see an opportunity to get Blake out working on odd jobs for others in the village. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">But there’s another opportunity for Blake, and one that comes from a very unlikely source. His name crops up while Brian’s giving Martyn ‘I’m not a monster’ Gibson a tour of Berrow Farm. Martyn’s impressed that Jazzer’s taken Blake under his wing and suggests that Blake is given a formal contract to work as a casual maintenance man at the farm. What Neil or deputy Hannah will say is anyone’s guess as they weren’t been consulted on the matter.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over at Home Farm Stella’s bemoaning the lack of labour to complete all the jobs that need doing. Although both Stella and Brian could fill in, she’s going to set up a pool of tractor drivers so that they always have someone available. Stella wants to start spraying but Brookfield’s sheep are all over the land grazing. No one seems to have given permission so Brian suggests she goes round and introduces herself and mention the sheep at the same time.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">David and Roooooth have their hands full weighing bullocks, so it’s Pip who receives her, but the first meeting doesn’t go well. Stella’s very pushy and demands the sheep are moved right away, but Pip sticks to her guns and says she’ll move them in the morning. Stella’s not impressed, much to Brian’s surprise, and wants to move the two farm’s dealings on a more formal footing. I don’t think that’s the last we’ll hear about issues between Pip and Stella, especially as Brian let slip that it was Pip whose mistake it was that resulted in an outbreak of Infectious Bovine Rhinotracheitis spreading to Home Farm.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Lilian’s still on cold turkey and is suffering from nicotine withdrawal, the main symptom of which seems to be irritability. Roooooth gets both barrels of Lil’s tongue when she tries to get her to change her harvest supper contribution from desert to starters or mains as she thinks she’s been put on the wrong list. Lilian takes offence that people don’t think she’s much of a baker, a situation that’s made worse when Roooooth reveals she actually allowed Jenny to change from providing a starter to a desert. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Lil is full of regrets which Shula picks up on when they’re getting ready to go out riding together. Shula’s feeling under the weather too as managing the stables alongside her ordination studies is getting her down, and Lilian suggests she comes round later for something to eat. The ride does Lilian good and she apologises to Roooooth, but she’s also had a bit of an epiphany (although strictly speaking that should be Shula’s department) suggesting that she and Justin should invest their spare money in the stables. A tad more dignified than a luxury yacht methinks. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Finally, I have to say to the scriptwriters that I didn’t think the name of Russ’s defunct barbers, Borset Barnet, really worked - I’d have gone for Borsetshair. Sounds a bit like Borsetshire? Oh, never mind - I’m wasted here). </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-15284994493800251132021-10-15T13:50:00.005+01:002021-10-15T13:54:22.913+01:00Easy, Rider<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Yt6lqj3hdSA/YWl4Q4eEGKI/AAAAAAAACt0/5ifyhDvHHPIuTPdm1zha80rosYrrdFLvQCLcBGAsYHQ/s1052/p00sfxvk%2B2.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1052" data-original-width="643" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Yt6lqj3hdSA/YWl4Q4eEGKI/AAAAAAAACt0/5ifyhDvHHPIuTPdm1zha80rosYrrdFLvQCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/p00sfxvk%2B2.jpg" width="196" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Ryan Kelly (Jack 'Jazzer' McCreary)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The tobacco industry shudders and share prices fall as the news that Lilian’s given up smoking reaches the industry. The other big news in the Bellamy/Elliott household is Alice and Chris’s impending divorce, and the impact it could have on Home Farm and therefore Borsetshire Land.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Speaking of Home Farm Justin Elliott takes Stella out for lunch and during their conversation we discover that they have history together - purely professional and above board of course. Stella previously worked for Justin on one of the farms in which Damara Capital has a stake and it was he who tipped her off when the farm manager job at Home Farm became available. During lunch he mentions the possible sale of Home Farm and Stella’s not happy, later telling Brian that it’s ungrateful and inconsiderate of him not to have told her himself. He agrees but protests that events had overtaken him and couldn’t find the right time to tell her. In return Stella now wants to know what else he hasn’t been telling her.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Where to start? He tells her about the pollution and subsequent fine that forced him to sell the house, then about Alice’s alcohol addiction and pending divorce. Stella thinks all is not lost - Chris and Alice haven’t actually filed for divorce yet and even if they do she’s sure they can find a way to sell some land and still make the farm viable. Step 1 she says is to secure the contract with Borsetshire land at the forthcoming board meeting. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Still apparently unaware of Justin and Stella’s history, Brian introduces them to each other at the meeting. Stella quickly asserts herself and outlines her plan to take advantage of the new farm incentives while also lowering overall costs. In the end she manages to retain the Home Farm contract much to the delight of Brian who’s cock-a-hoop about getting through another board meeting on top. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Chelsea still doesn’t want to continue with driving lessons but instead wants to learn to ride a motorbike, and thinks Jazzer’s the ideal person to teach her. Tracy’s not keen, to say the least, but Chels’ points out that as she’s 17 her mum can’t stop her, and if she tries she’ll go on strike from college. Eventually Tracy sees the sense in letting Jazzer teach her at least one lesson rather that someone they don’t know, but they’re still going to try and put her off.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jazzer does his best to make the lesson as boring as possible but Chelsea sees right through it and tells Jazzer she wants to have some fun and encourages him to show her just what his bike’s capable of. Jazzer opens up the throttle and Chelsea squeals declaring “OMG that was lit” (translation: my word, that was exciting). Now home but still full of adrenaline Chelsea feigns boredom but Tracey knows her daughter better than that and berates Jazzer for going against the plan, kicking him out before his favourite dinner of mince pie.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Instead of spending his evening lying on Tracey’s sofa with a full belly and a can of lager, Jazzer goes out birding with Jim. Jim thinks he’s spotted a Redwing and they head off to the hide but there’s already someone in there, sleeping. It’s the elusive Blake who’s made it his temporary night shelter and rather than cause a scene, Jim and Jazzer leave him a sleeping bag and a flask of tea, and the next morning Jazzer takes up bacon sandwiches and fresh tea. The talk about their shared experiences of a troubled upbringing and bond over football, and Jazzer helps Blake to understand that although the likes of Lynda and Jim may seem posh, all they want to do is help. Jazzer tells Blake how he cut himself sawing wood so that he could put up shelves for Jim’s rapidly growing book collection and Blake laughs saying that shelves are so easy. Blake offers to help him which gives Jazzer the chance to offer an open invitation to him to go round whenever he likes.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">If like me you have been on tenterhooks worrying about the birthday cake for Jill’s 91st, you’ll be glad to know that Beth has finished it. Josh winds Ben up (there’s £100 at stake remember) about how it will seriously put Jill’s nose out of joint to see how good it is which makes Ben seriously worried that it will upset her. So worried in fact that a struggle ensues as he tries to hide it, with the cake Inevitably landing up on the floor.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Beth can’t have held much of a grudge though as she agrees to let her dad take her and Ben out for dinner, to Les Soeurs Heureuses no less - yes the same fancy restaurant that Jill used as target practice with her flapjacks - see <a href="https://haharchers.blogspot.com/2017/07/the-flapjack-flinging-felon.html">The Flapjack Flinging Felon</a>. Ben has had to wear a tie and that’s not the only thing he’s uncomfortable with - the prices are making him choke too. Vince tells him not to be shy as he’s footing the bill so forget the goat’s curd salad and glass of water Ben, have the steak and a bottle of Margaux. But tread carefully Ben, although Vince says you “smell right”, he also won’t see Beth hurt again - “understood”? Such was the thinly veiled threat in that one word he might have well have said ‘Capiche?’, but he moves on and starts asking Chris about his nursing studies. He senses Chris’s earnestness and tells him that he has a serious nut allergy that’s nearly killed him on several occasions. Chris realises in panic that Vince has just eaten a pear and frangipane tart for dessert and shouts across the restaurant for an ambulance, just as Vince’s gasps turn to guffaws at his own distasteful prank. His daughter though is disgusted with him and storms out, challenging Ben to leave with her. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">When Vince calls round to apologise, Beth keeps him on the other side of the door. Ben is more willing to forgive than his girlfriend and laugh it off. He explains to Vince that his offer of a hotel stay in London to make up for it is part of the problem. All Beth wants is her Dad, not someone who’s always trying to prove how good he is. Vince explains that he’s proud of what he’s achieved and that all he’s ever wanted to do is provide his girls with the best of everything. Tail between his legs, Vince shows Beth a picture of her when she was only seven which he’s carried in his wallet ever since. “No more stupid jokes, enough with the swagger” is Beth’s demand, and Vince agrees. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Finally thais week, Roooooth seems to be the only one who’s noticed that Amy has been on leave from her job for rather a long time. Amy avoids the question, but later on after a walk to clear her head, confesses to her father that she’s leaving midwifery as her heart’s not in the job any more. Alan’s actually relieved as he’s been worried about the number of NHS staff dying from COVID, but the job has taken it’s toll in other ways and she just can’t take it any longer.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Let’s hope Ben manages to navigate through the demands of working for the NHS without too many issues. I think it would be good to follow his studies and subsequent career closely so that we get a real insight into what it’s like starting out in today’s health service, and not just become one of the characters we only hear about in passing like Dan Hebden Lloyd.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-60482321972952627152021-10-05T14:57:00.003+01:002021-10-05T14:57:58.533+01:00Like A Bridge Over Troubled Water<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-z1E2YKDy_D4/YVxZtb_9KYI/AAAAAAAACto/czSFaNeR_7c6VKxv11YYImqATu8B8U4xgCLcBGAsYHQ/s549/_116061428_mediaitem116061427%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="549" data-original-width="490" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-z1E2YKDy_D4/YVxZtb_9KYI/AAAAAAAACto/czSFaNeR_7c6VKxv11YYImqATu8B8U4xgCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/_116061428_mediaitem116061427%2B2.jpg" width="286" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"> </span><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Luke Macgregor (Blake)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">No time is wasted getting straight back to the Rob storyline as we find Kirsty looking for the key to the mortice lock on the back door of her old house which is now rented out to Helen and Lee. Lee’s getting jumpy, not helped by Joy’s cat setting of the CCTV alert to his phone, but the next alert is for real - it’s Rob outside his house. Lee tackles him and pulls his hoodie off to reveal not Rob, but Blake! That’s the first we’ve heard of him since he and the other lads got sold on to their new slavemaster. Lee doesn’t know who Blake is but when Kirsty brings him up to speed he realises that he was one of Philip Moss’ exploited workers. Blake’s been hanging around waiting for Philip to come home but doesn’t realise that he doesn’t live there any more and is in fact in prison. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Blake’s in a right mess - dishevelled and starving - and Kirsty calls on Harrison for help. When Blake hears this he gets himself in a state thinking he’s coming to arrest him. But all’s well when he meets him and sorts him out a place in a hostel, which makes a change from his previous accommodations in a freezing shed or a container. Kirsty finally tells him that Philip and Gavin are in prison for what they did to him Kenzie and Jordan, but Blake thinks that’s wrong, because Philip treated him the best out of all the slavemasters. Distressed at this news Blake runs away.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">As threatened last month, and at Lily’s suggestion, Chelsea’s started having driving lessons from her mother. I’m made to feel very old when Tracey tells her daughter that she doesn’t want her driving round like Nigel Mansell. Chelsea does seem to have a natural talent for driving as after only three lessons she seems to have picked it up really quickly. Obviously neither of them have read the highway code though, especially the bit about distractions, as Tracy talks incessantly and at one point causes Chelsea to practice her emergency braking skills by shouting “MIND THE RABBIT!”.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Tracy gets back behind the wheel and Chelsea takes great delight in telling her mum to slow down when she exceeds the speed limit, just as she gets caught by Lynda who’s out on a speeding patrol. She endures a stiff talking to from Lynda but she’s let off in exchange for a formal promise not to speed again and an offer to drive her home. Chelsea offers to drive but it’s not long before she has the chance to slam on the emergency brakes again when Blake dashes out in front of her.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Blake ends up in hospital but was very lucky, due to Chelsea’s swift reactions, and is only kept in for observation. He’s not receiving visitors though, as Kirsty finds out, but Lynda thinks she might stand a better chance. She takes the things Kirsty had bought him (crisps, grapes, shampoo, shower gel and a car magazine) and goes up to the ward. Incidentally, Borsetshire General seem to have a very lenient visiting policy in contrast to my local hospital where there are still very strict rules on who they let in and when. Don’t they know there’s still a pandemic on? Anyway, he agrees to see her and she reassures him that there will be no repercussions for the fire at Grey Gables in which she was severely burned. She gets him to see that the fire wasn’t his fault and that it’s not Kirsty’s fault that Philip’s in prison, and in fact it’s the chance for a new start. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Which brings us to the title of this week’s blog. Like a bridge over troubled water Lynda provides a place of safety at Ambridge Hall, much to the disquiet of Robert who thinks in opening up their home to him there’s a danger of Blake doing something ‘barmy’ while he’s there. Robert cooks and Blake is disconcerted by the very small dinner, until it’s explained to him that it’s a starter, the main course is going to be spaghetti bolognese. Poor Blake’s obviously overwhelmed by the food, house and formality of the meal and in his confusion spills water all over the floor. He retreats to his room, or rather that’s what he says. He actually goes missing and Lynda and Robert go looking for him, but Robert accepts he may not want to be found.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Chelsea meanwhile thinks the accident is a chance to claim some compensation for the ‘whiplash’ which she’s suddenly realised she’s probably almost certainly got, ‘cause that’s wot you get after a crash innit. Tracey puts her daughter right on the matter telling her it’s the stupidest idea she’s ever heard - Blake hardly exists on any records and certainly won’t have insurance! There follows a lesson in consumerism because Chelsea just wants all the things that she sees other girls on Instagram have got but she can’t afford. Tracy says she needs to spend less time on social media and points out that the continual acquisition of more stuff isn’t the key to happiness. Just a thought but if she’s desperate for money, and as she’s such a good driver, maybe she should train to drive an HGV - I’ve heard there’s a shortage and the pay’s pretty good now.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Finally we get to an actual Archer. David and Josh have taken some Herefords to market and they run into Beth, who works there. Josh turns into a little puppy dog and insists on going to get Beth a cup of tea - he’s remembered how she takes it. Meanwhile Beth and David get talking and Beth tells him the she thinks Ben will make a great nurse and she won’t distract him from his studies. She also re-assures him that she’s nothing like her Dad, Vince! Josh returns with the tea, and a doughnut for good measure, and suggests she could pop round this afternoon after work.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Beth does pop round and is subjected to the third degree by the rest of the family but Beth takes it all in her stride, even though Jill twice calls her Evie. Beth even offers to make Jill a cake for her birthday although Josh (who has burst in unannounced to Ben’s room) thinks it’s a bad idea incase it’s better than one of Jill’s own cakes. Even so he bets her a tenner that she can’t make a cake that will seriously impress his grandmother. Beth’s confident though - so confident that she raises the stake to £100 and Josh falls for it - her practice cake is amazing! Josh calls it “genius in a cake” and Ben suddenly realises why he’s been hanging round so much - he fancies Beth, although he can’t get him to admit it.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over at Home Farm Stella’s discussing her plan for next year’s crops and she wants to try companion cropping (looks like the agricultural story editor has woken up at last) to add nourishment to the soil and combat pests. Brian’s sceptical but Stella’s already bought the seed, much to his irritation, but she makes it clear to him that he hired her to manage the farm and doesn’t need micromanaging. She’s on top of the figures and has realised that when the current subsidies end (£100,000 a year) the farm will be in a perilous situation financially. Brian tries to blame Adam’s obsession with soil health but Stella brings him round saying that Adam’s left the farm in a good position to take advantage of the new sustainable farming incentive options (the agricultural story editor’s on fire this week). The bigger question for Stella though is knowing what Brian’s succession plan is. It will be no surprise to anyone that he doesn’t really have one.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian’s set up a meeting with Borsetshire Land to talk about renewing Home Farm’s contract, but as always he’s nervous about what Martyn Gibson will say. On top of that there’s the lack of succession plan and Alice’s divorce that might see part of the farm going to Chris. He mentions this to David who tells Brian how a friend of his lost half of his farm to his wife during his divorce. Brian asks how it ended up for his friend, and David tells him the farm was no longer viable so he sold up; which gives Brian an idea - “let’s just sell the whole damn lot”. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jenny’s not convinced but Brian says that if they sell the farm then everyone can have their share, be free to pursue their own interests and he can actually retire. But he still needs to convince his wife. How to do that? Oh yes, they can buy a big new house - no doubt with a brand new kitchen to match!</p><div><br /></div>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-90232575710667798812021-09-28T19:01:00.001+01:002021-09-28T19:04:52.315+01:00A Proper Night Out<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IlxiTKfIl6Y/YVNXgyGtSxI/AAAAAAAACtc/UTwBimcgYMMBG97XMdI0P-ql7st49x0lwCLcBGAsYHQ/s2048/IMG_8294.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="2048" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IlxiTKfIl6Y/YVNXgyGtSxI/AAAAAAAACtc/UTwBimcgYMMBG97XMdI0P-ql7st49x0lwCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/IMG_8294.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">A Cribbage Board</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It’s the morning of the Flower and Produce Show and Jennifer’s apprehensive about the day ahead as she’s not sure how much the Ambridge grapevine has caught up with the news about Alice’s decision not to move back in with Chris. Brian lends her moral support and walks her down to the show where she will be helping out with the judging.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jolene’s getting ready for the show by fiddling with her golden ivy and Kenton agrees it makes a most impressive centrepiece to her autumn-themed hanging basket. Eddie’s not pleased though as it will be going head to head with his and Clarrie’s entry, but a free pint from Jolene brings him round, and anyway he’s hopeful that his trimmed beetroot might bag him a prize. In the end Jolene ‘only’ gets highly commended but that’s better than Eddie’s trimmed beetroot that didn’t even get a third, in fact he hasn’t won anything at all. He couldn’t even win by nobbling half the village - all his efforts earned him was earache from Jennifer when she found out what he had been up to.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">After judging, Jennifer takes to the microphone and rubs salt in Eddies’ wounds by announcing that Bert Fry has won the Freda Fry Memorial Cup - on top of his three first prizes. But wait, this year there’s an extra prize in memory of Joe Grundy - the entry that raised the biggest smile. No not Cecil Jackson’s eye-watering pickled shallots, but Poppy Grundy for her monkey on a plate collage.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">With the show wrapped up until next year Jennifer pops in to see Chris at the workshop with a pair of pram shoes for Martha and tells him that she’s also popped a beef casserole in the freezer at The Nest. Then Amy pops in to say she’s bought Martha a sleep suit and Chris starts to worry that people are thinking that he can’t cope as a single parent. While Amy’s there he asks if she’d like to go out tomorrow night with him, Fallon and Harrison. Is that a date? </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">They go to The Bull with Chris determined that he's going to have a ‘proper night out’, having been there since straight after work. His companions turn out to be lightweights and are soon on the coffee while Chris is sounding increasingly drunk. He gets so drunk in fact that Jolene asks him to leave and then Amy and Fallon have to help him home. Chris is staggering all over the place and throwing up but they finally get him home and have to put him in the recovery position on his bed incase he’s sick in his sleep (we’ve all been there). </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The incident that prompted Jolene to throw Chris involved him Cecil Jackson. Apparently before the girls turned up he was sitting with Cecil buying him drink after drink, before giving him a hug and asking the whole pub to toast the man with the smallest wallet but the biggest marrow in Ambridge, before tripping over and then losing his dinner over a cribbage board (I’d probably just throw that away - imagine trying to clean vomit out of all those little holes with a cocktail stick).</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Amy gives Alice the heads-up and she finds him in the morning knowing only too well what he must be feeling like. She checks that he doesn’t want another drink and is relieved when he says the thought of it makes his stomach churn, as she would have reached for the bottle again. She tells him to take a shower while she looks after Martha and cooks him some breakfast. The irony of this role reversal isn’t lost on the pair of them and Chris tells Alice how impressed he is that she’s managing to stay dry.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The next day Alice is off to the stables to say goodbye to Banjo, and he’s pleased to see her. His new owner is an extremely accomplished rider called Rani Pershore but she won’t be picking him up until later so Shula suggests Alice takes him out for one last ride. Alice doesn’t think she deserves to because she feels she’s letting ‘Banj’ down but Shula says she needs to say a proper farewell to him. After the ride Alice grooms Banjo as he sighs appreciatively and tells Shula that she enjoyed it so much that she’d like to help Shula by taking the livery horses out now and then. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Head clear after the ride Alice goes back to Willow cottage and promptly drops a bombshell on Brian and Jennifer - she and Chris are getting divorced. It’s her decision but knows it’s the best for everyone, and her and Chris will still be friends and good parents to Martha. Brian’s reaction is typical - Chris will be entitled to a share of Alice’s assets, especially if he’s awarded custody. And what assets are they I hear you ask? Well, her share of Home Farm of course!</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over on the Beechwood Estate Joy has spotted someone acting suspiciously outside her house and it bothers her. So is Joy’s neighbour Lee. Not only has he seen footprints outside his house, Johnny noticed strange goings-on when he was on the estate and found the side gate to Helen and Lee’s house open when there was nobody home. Lee thinks he know’s who’s been poking around and doesn’t waste any time getting Helen and the boys to safety, packing them all off to Bridge Farm. The school’s alerted as Helen agrees that it’s Rob making an unwelcome return and is going to try and abduct his son Jack again (he kidnapped him 4 years ago but was foiled by Helen - see <a href="https://haharchers.blogspot.com/2017/02/hes-out-of-my-life-forever.html">He’s Out Of My Life Forever</a>).</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">They also contact the police, for what good that will do. When he fled to America the police said they would flag him as a person of interest should he try to return to the UK - so that worked then. Whatever Rob does next Lee’s convinced that they’ll have to stop him themselves - keep those knives sharp and handy Helen. Tony goes round to put up a security camera while under Joy’s unwanted supervision but she does come in handy though as a test subject to ensure the cameras’ movement sensor works. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I suppose at the very least having a Joy Horville early warning system on your house would come in very useful indeed.</p><div><br /></div>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-81254559961270991642021-09-22T17:59:00.000+01:002021-09-22T17:59:38.125+01:00Like Father, Like Son<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gfYtpzb4Q6w/YUtgpSOmwgI/AAAAAAAACtU/QJ1PtA8CpvwFxnSe_9NFBt7xHBMz-AyEwCLcBGAsYHQ/s1649/p00sc380%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1649" data-original-width="1008" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gfYtpzb4Q6w/YUtgpSOmwgI/AAAAAAAACtU/QJ1PtA8CpvwFxnSe_9NFBt7xHBMz-AyEwCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/p00sc380%2B2.jpg" width="196" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Trevor Harrison (Eddie Grundy)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Last week we were wondering where Kenton had got to, when lo and behold he pops up right at the start of this weeks’ episodes. Eddie and Oliver are drinking cider and discussing Eddie’s plan to win the Freda Fry Memorial Cup at the Flower and Produce show in the honour of his late father, Joe. Eddie’s been working his way round the village dissuading (or ‘taking out’) people from entering and thinks he has a pretty clear run enabling him to scoop enough firsts to win the ultimate prize. Oliver calls it ‘nobbling’ and isn’t happy, probably because he’s a decent sort of chap, so you can imagine what he thinks when Eddie suggests he has a word with Kenton about withdrawing from the hanging basket competition. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Oliver pops into The Bull to pop the question but completely fluffs it, saying how sad he is which leads Kenton and Jolene to think he’s talking about lockdown. After this he hasn’t the heart to ask them to withdraw, which he eventually confesses to Eddie, but Eddie doesn’t accept failure so lightly and tells Oliver they’ll go round in the morning and he’ll show him how it’s done. Eddie lays it on thick as he chokes back the tears, but Kenton’s not having any of it - the competition means a lot to The Bull too - but says he’ll have a word with Jolene - which he also fluffs. It takes Fallon to bring him to his senses when she points out that he’s is in effect talking about standing aside for Joe Grundy when Joe is someone who had conned him out of more free pints than he can remember. Which brings us to this weeks’ title, like father like son. Spurred on by this he tells Jolene that they’re going to wipe the floor with Eddie Grundy and his hanging baskets!</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It’s a big week for Jennifer as Alice’s spell in rehab is coming to an end. Jennifer goes round to see Peggy as a first step in reconciling their relationship after Jennifer blamed her for making Alice’s situation worse. Peggy wants to give her a prayer card she’s had in her bag for 50 years as she thinks now is the perfect time to pass it on. It was given to her by a chaplain at the sanatorium that looked after her first husband, Jennifer’s father. It’s the Fishermans’ Prayer - dear God be good to me, the sea is so wide and my boat is so small.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jennifer and Chris go to see Alice at her rehab clinic, and by their reaction she’s looking very well. Alice has been keeping a diary and but it’s full of spaces as she’s blanked so much of what happened out. Alices’ counsellor, Luke, is keen to go through the impact letters that Jennifers brought with her. Jennifer starts. I’ll spare you the details but halfway through Alice needs a break. Chris goes next but his letter is very short, or it is now after he crossed most of it out. They both feel drained but positive that there may be good news ahead as Alice seems so well. But Alice may have other ideas as she’s not sure she wants to go home at all.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over at the tea room it’s all hands on deck as they’ve under-catered for a 75th birthday party - not Fallon’s fault but the organiser’s. They need more help (Harrison’s proved to be useless in the kitchen) so Fallon calls in a favour from Jennifer who jumps at the chance of a distraction and predictably takes over and gets the team running like clockwork. Fallon sees that it did her good to do something different, and makes up a story about a diary clash to persuade her to take over judging from her at the Flower and Produce show. Jenny’s not sure at first but in the end sees it as symbolic of new beginnings now that Alice has the opportunity to make a fresh start.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice comes back to Ambridge and has a heart to heart with Emma who tries to convince her that going back to Chris would be best, and is she really going to rely on help from everyone else but the man she loves? Yes, she does, but it’s breaking her heart. When Alice turns up at The Nest she finds that Chris has put up a ‘welcome home’ banner and she holds Martha for the first time in ages while Chris cooks dinner - a Thai curry. After dinner Chris shows Alice Martha’s memory box including a drawing he did of Martha asleep. It reminds Alice of all the time she wasted and all the times she made Chris miserable, but Chris is determined to be a family again and asks Alice to come home. Alice is not moving back in yet, preferring to stay at Willow Cottage. In fact she might not move back at all as she thinks she has to continue fighting her addiction on her own, to the point of giving up on her marriage.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Another marriage showing the strain is Ian and Adams’.There’s cross words at Honeysuckle cottage as an exhausted Adam is struggling to keep awake when he should be looking after Xander. Ian calls during his shift at Grey Gables but Xander answers (he’s 2 remember) because Adam’s fast asleep. When Ian returns in a hurry he finds their son on his own in the kitchen surrounded by knives, spilled milk, jam and cereal.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Adam thinks he just needs more rest but Ian thinks it’s also the job as his boss doesn’t have a background in farming and seems to be a bit of a handful - for example going against Adam’s advice in favour of things he’s seen on the internet. He’s also texting in the evening and asking Adam to do extra hours including giving up a Saturday. The pair rack their brains looking for a solution and Ian suggests they move.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I think I’ve got the answer as it’s clearly another case of like father like son. Next time leave out a stool so Xander can reach the hob and make a start on dinner as he’s clearly showing signs of inheriting Ians’ talents in the kitchen.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-38449576983411352532021-09-17T14:54:00.000+01:002021-09-17T14:54:25.602+01:00Will Chris Migrate Back To His Nest?<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vFdEBnE6elM/YUSdtqC0EsI/AAAAAAAACtM/yd5lXO7FhwomVF4-awE3oOIUM3rsNiiPACLcBGAsYHQ/s470/Wilf_Scolding.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="440" data-original-width="470" height="300" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vFdEBnE6elM/YUSdtqC0EsI/AAAAAAAACtM/yd5lXO7FhwomVF4-awE3oOIUM3rsNiiPACLcBGAsYHQ/s320/Wilf_Scolding.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="background-color: white; color: #2e2e2e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Wilf Scolding (Chris Carter)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We have a big mystery on our hands this week. No, not what’s happened to Kenton who’s been missing in action for the best part of this year, even missing the village fete, but the disappearance of Susan’s green lasagne dish. Could Kenton have made off with it? Oh hang on, it’s not a mystery, Shula’s still got it from when Neil took a lasagne round to her when she broke her arm. Susan goes round to collect it and grills Shula on what exactly Neil has been doing round there all this time when she was on her knees with the exhaustion of it all. Don’t worry Susan I don’t think Shula was on her knees, as much as Neil would have wanted her to be, he maybe just wanted to spend time somewhere more peaceful than at home.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">When Neil comes in exhausted from a shift at the piggery, he walks into an atmosphere as cold as Susan’s pantry. He’s expecting his dinner to be on but instead Susan’s busy cleaning the oven. He suggests making a start and Susan asks why he doesn’t make her his special lasagne. He says they might have it on at The Bull if she fancies going out but she says she hates lasagne - especially his! He hasn’t got a clue what’s going on so storms off to the pub to get some anyway.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">When Neil makes a determined effort to find out what’s wrong (can he <i>really</i> be that insensitive?) Susan doesn’t help. Instead of asking whether he and Shula are having an affair, she comes at it completely left field by asking how he felt when Shula fell off her horse. The answer, obviously, is shocked, upset and worried as well as guilty that he might have contributed to it because she was on the phone to him when she fell. Her follow up question is how did he feel on his subsequent visits to Shula’s? Susan’s point is that he’d rather spend time with Shula than with her, and finally she asks the question - “are you in love with Shula?”. Outraged, Neil tells Susan that she’s the woman he loves, she’s been his ‘better half’ for 37 years, and that’s the way it’ll be until the day he dies. Shula is his friend but Susan is his lover and soul-mate. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Neil then turns it back on Susan asking whether it’s more of a case that she feels differently about him now, but no - she’ll never stop loving him she says.Neil feels compelled to go round to the stables and apologise to Shula for not listening to her warnings about the gossip in the village and says that he won’t be dropping in unannounced any more, but if she needs him, she knows where he is. “Look after yourself” she whispers longingly as he leaves.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Amy Franks is back from Nottingham for a visit and her and Chris exchange notes about Alice, Martha and Amy’s experience of being a midwife during COVID. Later on she gets to meet Martha and takes her to the playground with Chris. Chris and Amy have a bit of a heart-to-heart and he tells her that he’s planning to move out of Ambridge View and into a place of his own - well actually his own place - The Nest, the former holiday cottage that he and Alice had made their home. He’s interrupted by an email from Alice’s rehab clinic (she’s due out next week) suggesting he pays her a visit together with Jennifer. The idea is that they and Brian write letters to Alice saying how her drinking affected them and then read them out to her now she’s sober. Apparently this will be a vital part of her recovery but Brian’s not convinced, thinking that if they set out exactly what Alice’s drinking has done to them all, the guilt will cripple her and they'll be back to square one. He can’t get her words out of his head - “I hate you Dad I hate you!”.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ben takes Beth up Lakey Hill for a picnic. She tells him how her ex-boyfriend had had a fling with her best friend and goes on to say how she doesn’t understand how people can be so fake with their relationships (like Ben finishing with Evie so he can go out with you, you mean). She fancies going for a swim in the Am but Ben says the river Perch would be better and they make a date for next Wednesday. When Wednesday comes round Beth dares him to go skinny-dipping and holds out a bottle of gin she’s brought along as an incentive. But first Chris feels that he has to come clean about ending his relationship with Evie and sounds genuinely contrite but Beth appreciates his honesty and as punishment pushes him into the river fully clothed.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Eddie’s feeling maudlin as it would have been Joe’s 100th birthday soon, and he would have been busy helping get things ready for the turkey season as this year’s poults arrive. Oliver suggests a special cider club celebration in his honour but Eddie’s not in the mood. He does have idea of how to win big (by cheating of course) at the upcoming Flower and Produce show but first he has a job to do as Joy Horville is calling in the ‘relaxing treat’ she exchanged for the prize she won at the village fete - a mystery tour in Eddie’s limousine. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Much to Eddie’s horror she doesn’t take up position in the back, but up front in the passenger seat right next to him, where she says they can have a lovely chat. Eddie tries to get out of it without success so has no choice but to go ahead, with the theme being (which he makes up on the spot) modern rural life. What does that mean? Well, a visit to the market to see the sheep auction, a sausage and egg sandwich from a roadside tea wagon, and some free labour topping up his poults’ food and water.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Hi have to say that Joy is turning to to be one of the more dependable characters in Ambridge and seems able to fit in wherever she goes and whoever she meets. Apart from her ability to talk the hind legs off a donkey, she doesn’t seem to be a bad neighbour to have. But of course Eddie only sees a situation of which he can take advantage, and when she mentions that she will be entering the Flower and Produce Show Eddie asks in which categories. When she tells him he tries pulling on her heartstrings by saying that they’re the ones that his grandchildren Keira and Mia are entering and have set their hearts on winning, in memory of their great grandad Joe who always dreamed of winning but never did. It looks like his plan is working as Joy says that in that case she might miss this years’ show, but judging on past events, I wouldn’t be surprised if she manages to teach Eddie a much-needed lesson or two.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-47385472738895062412021-09-07T19:13:00.000+01:002021-09-07T19:13:09.773+01:00There’s No Accounting For Taste<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Y7xbWvNya3w/YTerN_-hWEI/AAAAAAAACtA/v8cuyAQ75fMaa3VkmVuS14Uv36xz99Y9ACLcBGAsYHQ/s168/Unknown%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="168" data-original-width="168" height="200" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Y7xbWvNya3w/YTerN_-hWEI/AAAAAAAACtA/v8cuyAQ75fMaa3VkmVuS14Uv36xz99Y9ACLcBGAsYHQ/w200-h200/Unknown%2B2.jpeg" width="200" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Simon Williams & Sunny Ormonde (Justin Elliott & Lilian Bellamy)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Justin and Lilian have got a few bob to spend from the sale of a barn and Lilian has seen an opportunity to by a first class bay horse (more commonly known in non-horsey circles as a brown one) and has engaged Jakob to give it the once-over. Justin is irritated by this as he’s arranged a short break for them both to the Isle of Wight and he’s worried about missing their ferry. Adding to his irritation is the fact that it’s a Sunday so Jakob’s fee is going to be astronomical on top of the hundreds of thousands for the nag itself. Despite the King’s ransom he’ll be paid, Jakob is irritated as well, mainly due to Justin and Lilian’s attempts to get him to hurry up. They should know by now, as do we, that Jakob’s not the hurrying type, especially as the horse, Double Bill, is the most valuable animal he’s ever assessed. Lilian tries turning on the charm to get Jakob to tip her the wink (does she know him at all?) but he insists on being thorough by requesting blood tests and an ultrasound, which will take hours. Justin and Lilian depart with a request to be contacted as soon as the results are in.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Once ensconced in the ferry’s bar they start to unwind with a couple of G&T’s (I hope the bar’s well stocked) and Justin lets on about his real intentions for their trip. He thinks that instead of sinking their funds in an eventer they should instead buy a yacht! Apparently eventing was his ex-wife Miranda’s thing and that’s put him off for life, whereas he thinks Lilian would rather re-kindle her apparent love of sailing. Furthermore he thinks that Damara and Amside should have their own racing team and they could travel the world. For ‘love of sailing’ read ‘over exaggerated boasting to Mandy Beesborough about her sailing prowess’ so, how do you get out of this one Lilian? </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Lilian’s plan is to beat Justin to the post and buy the horse before Justin has a chance to buy a yacht, but Jakob’s taking longer than expected to report the results. To further pile on the pressure, when they meet the broker Nancy in Cowes, she turns out to be one of Lilian’s old acquaintances from her sailing days out of Guernsey. We learn that Lilian used to be called Lighthouse Lil, because she used to glow after a few drinks (and not because she was a navigational aid to passing sailors although she may have been that too). Out of earshot of Justin Nancy can’t resist reminding Lilian about an incident that happened last time she was in a boat - something about a phantom walrus of all things.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Nancy shows the pair around a couple of boats and Justin is very impressed with the woodwork and overall craftsmanship, while Lilian is very dismissive. Alongside this, Nancy is simultaneously bigging-up Lilian’s abilities saying that her piloting skills are something to be believed, while flattering and fawning all over Justin and extolling the prospect of relaxing between races on a fully-crewed yacht. It’s when Nancy starts picking her up on her boating terminology that Lilian starts to bite (fair enough, even I know the pointy end is the stern - or is it the bow?) and is compelled to spill the beans. Apparently the incident with the fictitious walrus, that incidentally turned out be a rock, resulted in their keel being ripped off and having to be rescued by a lifeboat. She was never, she confesses, a very good sailor and in fact positively hated it - she was only trying to fit in with the crowd.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">So it’s back to the horse and Jakob’s got some preliminary results through and it’s not good news. Double Bill has got a serious case of PSD (Proximal Suspensory Desmitis) in both hind legs which would require surgery to prevent it developing into lameness. Lilian is at a loss to how it wasn’t obvious when they saw the horse but Jakob has found out why - it had been doped with bute (phenylbutazone), an anti-inflammatory drug which would have disguised the problem. So that’s the yacht and the horse out of the picture, so what to spend the money on? </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alistair has agreed to look after a West Highland Terrier called Mousse owned by an elderly client of his while she’s in hospital having a dodgy foot seen to. Alistair warns Jazzer about the Westie’s attitude just as she’s sinking her teeth into him. On the other hand she’s all over Jazzer, demanding belly rubs and ear skritches, which is a good thing as later on Alistair is incapable of looking after her at the surgery because she won’t leave Jakob alone. Alistair brings Mousse back to Greenacres for Jazzer to look after and discovers that far from having a problem with strangers, Mousse just seems to have a problem with Alistair, as she runs straight to Tracy for more fussing. Mousse isn’t a fan of the classics either which she demonstrates by knocking over and smashing Jim’s Cicero mug - you know, the one with “De gustibus non disputandum est!” written on it - that was a present from his last tutor group.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jakob hasn’t been handling the pressure of assessing Double Bill very well and takes it out on his practice nurse Denise, saying that she’s even more annoying than ‘that stupid dog’ mousse. This is the last straw for Denise who’s had to put up with Jakob’s lack of manners for the past two years, and she quits. It’s obvious that he’s never appreciated her - when he’s looking for sample pots he eludes that running round after him gave her something to do in-between looking after hamsters! His penance is to take his share of looking after her small animal clinic - first up is a rat with mites - and he then has to ring Denise to apologise, hoping she’ll come back.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Denise comes in to the practice and Jakob starts a grovelling apology which is interrupted by Lilian bursting in bearing one of Underwoods’ finest summer hampers as a thank-you for doing such a thorough job over Double Bill, saving her shed-loads of money. Back to the apology and Jakob starts to make the situation worse but pulls it out of the bag at the last minute when he realises that continuing to see clients would make the fact that Denise’s children are leaving home more bearable. Alistair makes it a double-whammy by suggesting she re-homes Mousse as her owner has had to go into a nursing home and the alternative would be taking her to the pet rescue.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">By the way, before you reach for your old school Latin-English dictionary, the slogan on Jim’s mug roughly translates as “there’s no accounting for taste”, which pretty well sums up the various storylines in this week’s episodes.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Finis.</p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-71024931076564363912021-09-02T18:02:00.003+01:002021-09-02T18:02:50.165+01:00Out With Evie, In With Beth<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-puaTEe40Km0/YTEDgXMOxoI/AAAAAAAACs4/LtUBwNp2wYA1OuGhPy2whLKil4iHHPNZwCLcBGAsYHQ/s225/Unknown-25%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="225" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-puaTEe40Km0/YTEDgXMOxoI/AAAAAAAACs4/LtUBwNp2wYA1OuGhPy2whLKil4iHHPNZwCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-25%2B2.jpeg" width="225" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Rebecca Fuller (Beth Casey)</b></div><p></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Elizabeth and Lily are getting ready for the Casey wedding. So is David as he’s trying to get everything ready - he’s even agreed to Steph’s request to be greeted by two ewes on arrival. It’s fallen on Roooooth to sort that out and is relying on Elizabeth to give her the heads-up when they’re on their way. Vince, meanwhile, is making furrows in the lawn with his relentless pacing up and down as he worries about seeing his estranged daughter Beth and her ‘waste of space’ boyfriend Nathan.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">At the reception the champagne’s flowing and judging by Lily’s critique of the other guests it’s quite the trashy affair. There are facelifts and tattooed eyebrows galore and Steph’s dress is covered in 50,000 hand-sewn crystals (really?) and Vince’s exes are getting hammered. There’s no mention of how groom Liam is dressed - I’m imagining a man-bun, stubble, open necked shirt and loafers with no socks.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Beth and Elizabeth get talking. To be honest, on conversation alone, Beth seems to be the more well-adjusted of the Casey daughters. I warmed to her right from the moment she called David an ‘old dude’ in-front of Roooooth and Elizabeth. Liz turns out to be a mediator between Beth and her father Vince and persuades Beth to approach him. We learn that Beth and Nathan have split up, and Beth concedes that her father may have had a point about him, admitting that he was ‘a total loser’. </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over at Home Farm they’re setting up a conference call with Debbie so that they can all interview the two shortlisted candidates for the new farm manager - Barnaby and Stella. We’re not included to the actual interviews, but the outcome is that everyone wants to give the job to Stella, except that is Brian, who wants Barnaby to have it. Kate calls Barnaby a mini-Brian and Jennifer agrees saying that he had ‘no spark’ and wasn’t bringing any new ideas. Kate smells a rat and discovers that Brian had encouraged him to apply, and he must have thought it was in the bag. Brian’s hurt that he didn’t get his way and excuses himself sharply to do some ‘real farming’.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">When Stella arrives at Home Farm to discuss terms she says all the right things, but drives a hard bargain over her salary, asking for 10 percent more to cover her accommodation costs (her last job included a place to live). Brian counters with 5 percent but when Stella expresses doubts Jennifer offers 7.5 and has her hand bitten off. Brian’s ego is bruised and feels surplus to requirements as effectively all the decisions over the recruitment process were made by the rest of the family. </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Josh has signed a deal with Borsetshire Catering to supply them with eggs but have given them a massive discount, and plans to recoup the profits later. Ben’s got something on his mind, or rather someone - he’s fallen for Beth Casey and can’t deal with it as he’s still going out with Evie, his girlfriend of nearly a year now. His brother Josh wisely counsels him not to rush into something he might regret. Pip picks up on his mood too and it turns out that Josh has already spilled the beans on his younger brothers’ love life. He’s tormenting himself as he can’t decide what to do and pleads with Pip to make the decision for him. While she doesn’t exactly do that, she says that if Ben’s having doubts about Evie then maybe he should follow his instincts. He doesn’t even know how to break up with her so gets Pip’s advice on that too, and then wastes no time in going off to do the deed. It goes as well as expected of course, with a tearful Evie taking it very badly. Ben other the other hand is straight on the phone to Beth.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Christopher is noticing that his parents don’t seem to be getting on as well as normal and puts it down to the stress of looking after Martha and comments that they never take time to relax together. Neil thinks it will blow over and tells Chris as much, but Susan thinks it goes deeper than that and confides in Pat that she thinks their relationship is in trouble - “it’s like somethings coming between us” she says. Speaking of which, Neil runs into Shula and she apologies for how she spoke to him a couple of weeks ago. She asks about Alice and while explaining what’s happening he tells Shula how much he’s missed her - and then starts to break down. Shula’s advice is the same as Pats’ - making an effort to spend more time together.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">That opportunity soon arises as Christopher has a surprise for his parents. He, Emma and Tracy are treating them to a meal at Grey Gables so they can spend a night with each other in peace and quiet. In fact the dinner is very peaceful and very quiet as they struggle to make conversation together, and what conversation they do make is like treading on eggshells (and if it’s Josh’s eggs the shells will be very fragile indeed unless his hen’s have made a speedy recovery from their Bronchitis). It’s hardly the most dynamic piece of radio drama you’ll hear, but the sound effects department certainly earn their money with the full-on generic restaurant ambience, although I’d have appreciated them reigning in Susan and Neil’s eating noises a bit (I think they may have re-used an old recording of Neil feeding his pigs).</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Nothing much of note happens until Neil mentions Shula and the sudden drop of temperature in the room is palpable and it’s remarkable that Neil doesn’t pick up on Susan’s change in tone. She puts down her knife and fork and he asks if there’s something wrong with her food. “No Neil, something’s wrong with us” and cites the awkward silences and chit-chat to pass the time instead of proper conversation as evidence. Is it tiredness as Neil suggests or is there a more fundamental problem? They skip desert and go home early, much to Chris’s surprise, and while Neil stays up with a hot chocolate in front of the telly, it’s straight to bed for Susan.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">A more enjoyable dinner is had by Lily and Russ, who are over at No.6 The Green where they are Tracey and Jazzers’ guests. Far from Russ’s prediction of a miserable evening spent over a Pot Noodle supper, Tracy impresses with a chicken dish the details of which we are not privy too. Perhaps this is a teaser for a Tracy Horrobin cookbook - it would make a nice companion to the Jennifer Aldridge cookbook which I recently snapped up for £1 at a local village fete. Lily, who is barely older than Chelsea, suggests she might be motivated by the chance to take driving lessons, which out of financial necessity, Tracy will deliver.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I remember when Lily herself was learning to drive and Kenton took her and Freddie out for a lesson. I think ‘shell-shocked’ was his reaction. Let’s hope that Chelsea is a better student and Tracy a more competent instructor!</p><p>
</p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-56450235837196214382021-08-26T14:56:00.003+01:002021-08-26T14:56:59.934+01:00No Authority - No Authority At All<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-pecz-yiGXRk/YSec4vIjxaI/AAAAAAAACsw/UPdhHSD7P5ATRoSYddXP_x_ropVmSD9TQCLcBGAsYHQ/s225/Unknown-24%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="225" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-pecz-yiGXRk/YSec4vIjxaI/AAAAAAAACsw/UPdhHSD7P5ATRoSYddXP_x_ropVmSD9TQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-24%2B2.jpeg" width="225" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Jackie Weaver</b></div><p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>
<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Both Harrison and Fallon have an afternoon off but It seems that Fallon would like to spend her time with Vincent. Who is Vincent? Vincent is one half of Fallon’s entry for the scarecrow competition at the village fete and is modelled on Vincent Vega, John Travolta’s character in Reservoir Dogs. The other half? Mia Wallace the gangster’s wife, played by Uma Thurman in the film. Fallon’s not sure she’s got Vincent’s hair right so heads off to the village hall where the theatrical wigs are stored. I wonder what scene she’ll have them reenacting, the one where Mia overdoses on Heroin and Vincent injects adrenaline into her heart to restart it? No of course not, dancing the twist at Jack Rabbit Slim’s restaurant of course!</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Someones been messing with The Bull’s scarecrow and it’s now leaning against the pub surrounded by empty wine bottles and apparently bears more than a passing resemblance to Alice. The real Alice is nowhere to be found. Brian and Jennifer thought she was in her room but her bed’s not been slept in and it doesn’t take long for the whole village to be out looking for her. Brian’s just about to start driving round the village when Jenny gets a message from her saying she’s ok and will be back soon.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The wine bottles will have to be cleared away from the scarecrow as to everyone’s surprise Alice is back in rehab, and she’s sent a short letter to Jennifer explaining how it happened. Apparently she turned up at Shula’s very upset and asked her to sell Banjo to help fund a return to rehab. It could take weeks to sell the horse so Shula advanced her the money. Jennifer’s very grateful and relieved as it looks like Alice’s battle with alcohol may have turned a corner.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Mystery still surrounds the identity of the celebrity guest who will be opening the fete and judge the scarecrow competition, but could it be the one who’s wandering around the village? One whom I would suspect would do rather well on the real Mastermind, and certainly wipe the floor with the competition on the celebrity version just as she did with the chair of Handforth parish council. The first person to encounter her is Tracy Horrobin who thinks she’s her old domestic science teacher but Jackie Weaver (for it is she) is gracious in her misunderstanding. Jackie’s looking for Usher and Tracy shows her where she is, all the time rubbishing everyone else’s scarecrows. Tracy, for what it’s worth, has made a Minion. Wikipedia’s description is “characterised by their childlike behaviour and unique language, which is almost intelligible at times” - that’s Minions not Tracy Horrobin.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">But there’s trouble as well as tea brewing at the refreshment tent as Hilary Noakes and Audrey Fisher have raised an angry mob to protest against the scarecrow competition. Lynda wants a show of strength by raising a militia to dispel the protest but Usher is sent to negotiate terms instead, while Tracy distracts Jackie Weaver by taking her back home for a cuppa. Jackie see’s through the ruse so Tracy spills the beans about what’s really going on while Jackie listens intently. Usha’s mission is futile and just when all seems lost Jackie Weaver’s voice is heard over the loudspeakers. </p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">After introducing herself she addresses the protesters and explains that her experience in local government matters tells her that they may be contravening various areas of legislation - blocking the public highway without first informing the police, carrying out activities that are outside the scope of the fete’s license, and finally she informs them that they have no authority - no authority at all! Once the protest has dispersed she eschews the offer of more tea in favour of a half of Shires.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">In other news Adam’s been offered a farm manager job at Danforth Barton Farm, a 4,000 acre farm on the other side of Felpersham, the commute to and from which will play havoc with Zanda’s childcare. Ian Is very supportive but Adam’s worried out the effect on their marriage too. It’s Adam’s ideal job so they both agree to make it work. Adam gives Brian two week’s notice and he takes the news well and they both end up being philosophical about the 18 years they’ve spent working together. Jenny on the other hand is furious, not so much about Adam leaving but that it’s obviously been known about for ages and she hasn’t been kept in the loop about an important development. She’s determined to be fully involved in the selection of the new farm manager.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over to Lower Loxley and there someone else is about to get furious. Elizabeth goes hat shopping for Steph’s wedding assisted by Lily, and Liz wonders whether she will soon be buying another hat for another wedding. Not yet, says Lily, although their relationship is going well and her and Russ are going away for the night (to Grey Gables!) which Lily will pay for out of her bonus that’s just come through. When Elizabeth Shows Vince the hat she’s chosen his reaction is not what she expected; “did you keep the receipt?” It’s not because he doesn’t like it, but Vince says that Steph’s put him in a difficult position by asking for Lizzie to be uninvited. The official excuse given by Vince is to keep the numbers down but Lily discloses that her and Russ have just had an invite and after talking to Steph there seems to be spare places.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Elizabeth asks Vince a straightforward question to which she expects a simple answer - who’s telling the truth about the wedding, Vince or his daughter Steph? The answer is that Steph was telling the truth and Vince lied because he found out that all three of his ex-wives and his estranged daughter will be at the wedding and none of them have a good word to say about him. He didn’t want Elizabeth exposed to all his dirty linen but knows he’s messed up and asks her to accompany him after all. Elizabeth accepts but makes it very clear that he’s messed up for the last time - there will be no more chances after this. She won’t be lied to again.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Lily and Russ turn up at Grey Gables for their night away but there’s been a mix-up and Roy’s allocated them a single room. He changes the booking but this time allocates them a room with twin beds. Roy’s not quite with it and so Tracy changes it this time to a double. Russ isn’t happy with the mix ups and is even less pleased when Tracy invites them round to her house for dinner. The time Tracy and Roman came round to Lower Loxley isn’t an evening he’s likely to forget, and just incase he does, Lily accepts the invitation. It’s turns out that Tracy has an ulterior motive as she wants to pick their brains about Chelsea and her poor exam results. This concern for her daughter’s education pricks Russ’ conscience and suddenly he’s happy to accept and his whole demeanour changes. I’m sure, like me, that you’re looking forward to the evening chez Tracy and Jazzer with great anticipation.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">And finally, I know you can’t wait to find out who won the scarecrow competition. I was rather hoping that Jackie Weaver would make an innocent faux-pas and award the prize to The Bull, but no, it was Rex and Phoebe with their depiction of a family camping scene. How nice.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-46645163128670780172021-08-18T18:13:00.003+01:002021-08-18T18:13:38.882+01:00It's Time - I'm Leaving<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l7PTHSTgvxc/YR0_jc3T_rI/AAAAAAAACso/B-f_Fp0xdvM-7zJs9b6iTbPOHa0u5cRewCLcBGAsYHQ/s268/Unknown-23.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="188" data-original-width="268" height="188" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l7PTHSTgvxc/YR0_jc3T_rI/AAAAAAAACso/B-f_Fp0xdvM-7zJs9b6iTbPOHa0u5cRewCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-23.jpeg" width="268" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Arthur Hughes (Ruairi Donovan)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Two weeks into babysitting Alice and Amy Franks has had enough. Alice is going back home but things are still far from happy there as Jennifer and Peggy still haven’t resolved their differences. However Jennifer’s in a more positive (if naive) mood when she’s says that whatever Alice does now, she’ll just let it wash over her.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Seasoned listeners (and/or readers of our humble blog) will recognise that as a cue to gird our collective loins as there’s going to be something less like a gentle wash and more like a tsunami, and sure enough we see the sea receding from the shore as Alice and Ruairi are talking. Tetchy to say the least, Alice is irritated by Ruairi’s gentle questions and reassurances when all he is trying to do is understand her situation so he can help. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice nips out for a quick sniff of Jolene’s apron and returns with a handbag full of ‘lunch’ but Jennifer can see, and probably smell, the vodka. Then the tsunami hits and within moments leaves a trail of devastation. ‘Hateful’ is how Jennifer describes Alice’s systematic destruction of the family - Brian’s extracurricular ‘shagging’ which was apparently due to Jennifer’s nagging, and how Ruairi isn’t a proper part of the family, “the little bastard that no-one planned and no-one wanted”, a mistake, “a cuckoo in the nest”. She goes on to say that it’s been a pain to have been around “the little brat sobbing over his dead mummy” and no-one could say what they really felt about him.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice goes on to say that Ruairi destroyed Jennifer and that her and Kate had to rally round Jenny when Siobhan’s CD arrived (she recorded a message to him just before she died which he received on his 18th birthday). There’s an element of truth to this that Jennifer cannot deny and an upset Ruairi has to leave the room. Alice carries on spewing out her bile and only a sharp slap on the face from Jennifer stops her.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The next morning Ruairi’s up early as he’s anxious to get to school to pick up his exam results. Alice’s rant has had a profound affect on how he feels about his family, and he stayed over at Ben’s because he couldn’t face going back to Adam’s. He tells Ben that he’s sick of all of them and wants to make sure his results are enough for him to get on with his life. Of course he smashes it with 3 A stars and can go to London to study, which he can’t wait to do. In fact so keen is he to get away from Ambridge that he’s booked tickets to Ireland to see the rest of his family, is leaving tomorrow and will probably go straight to college from there. Jennifer tries to dissuade him and the conversation is calmer without Alice around, but Ruairi doesn’t change his mind. It’s time - he’s leaving.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">While all this is going on, Alan is speculating about the mystery celebrity who will be opening the village fete. It is still officially a secret but Lilian can’t contain herself and tells him that Lynda has nominated herself on the basis of having an MBE. The best response Alan can manage is “I suppose we could do worse” while Lilian thinks that anyone you could buy a box of matches off in the village shop hardly counts as a celebrity. I tend to agree, although at least I would have heard of her - half the time I haven’t got a clue who these so-called celebrities are who pop up on TV with alarming regularity. And why I’m on the subject, why are the questions on ‘celebrity’ game shows always so much easier than on the regular versions? But I digress.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Lynda has troubles of her own. Audrey Fisher (who we only recently became aware of when she was voted in as interim chair of the parish council) and Hilary Noakes (long-standing opponent of anything that might bring a little joy to the residents of Ambridge) object to the scarecrow competition on the flimsy associations between scarecrows and death and horror. Their plan is to have the village fete’s license revoked by escalating the issue to the local MP. Alan gets his solicitor wife Usha on the case and she’s pretty sure that Audrey and Hilary’s plan will fail. What’s more she has a contact who faced a similar situation so will check with her just to make sure.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Finally back to Alice. She’s full of regrets and isn’t made to feel any better when she encounters her father in the kitchen. I could tell he wasn’t happy because I lost count of the times he repeated Alice’s words back to her - “don’t be hard on me!”</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-41200672554793382092021-08-09T17:12:00.000+01:002021-08-09T17:12:17.596+01:00Shula Falls For Neil<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CB641jcsoAA/YRFTarBi0JI/AAAAAAAACsc/YQi7oIsBHDIXdMgflFkwz_AmzbC0YKnPQCLcBGAsYHQ/s220/judybennett-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="220" data-original-width="180" height="220" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CB641jcsoAA/YRFTarBi0JI/AAAAAAAACsc/YQi7oIsBHDIXdMgflFkwz_AmzbC0YKnPQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/judybennett-1.jpg" width="180" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Judy Bennett (Shula Hebden Lloyd)</b></div><p></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Shula drops in at Brookfield to pick up her beef order; she tells David how busy it is at the Stables, plus she has heard about her upcoming ordination placement, which will take place shortly, at a parish in Birmingham. Life is hectic and she doesn’t know whether she’s coming or going. David asks if she is seeing Neil later and remarks that he seems to be spending a lot of time at the Stables. Shula explains about their arrangement, whereby Neil looks after Shula’s garden and, in return, she gives Keira free riding lessons. She says she’d better go – she is taking out a newly-acquired pony today to see how it behaves. As Shula leaves, Rooooth remarks that Shula seems to have a lot on her mind, and on her plate.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Meanwhile, Neil and Jazzer are at Berrow Farm, getting ready to move some pigs. They discuss their respective other halves, and Jazzer conveys way too much information about how Tracy is not one of those people who falls asleep as soon as their head touches the pillow and it’s no wonder that he finds it difficult to get up in the mornings. Neil makes the point that Susan always likes the last word – “You can never win an argument with a Horrobin woman” he tells Jazzer.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Just then, Neil’s phone rings. It’s Shula, wanting to tell Neil not to come and do the garden later, as she will be tied up. She is riding the new horse and Neil can see her on the bridleway. The horse seems a bit skittish and it is suddenly spooked, throwing Shula to the ground, where she lies, unconscious. Neil tells Jazzer to call an ambulance and, when the Scotsman goes to the farm gate to show the paramedic the way in, Neil talks to the recumbent Shula, saying that it looks like she has broken her arm, “but it’s OK – I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The following day we learn that Shula’s arm is indeed broken and they kept her in overnight in case of concussion. Neil returns home early from work; he had a sleepless and disturbed night, worrying, so he called it a day. He is surprised when Susan tells him that Shula is at home – David picked her up and brought her back. </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Susan knows this because she dropped in to see Shula, as she (Susan) was feeling guilty because she was very short with Shula when she dropped in on her and Neil the other day and Susan wanted to apologise. In the course of this conversation, Shula mentions that Neil is helping her with her shed, which is news to Susan. “I hardly ever see Neil nowadays” his wife says, a trifle wistfully. What, with looking after Martha and the household chores, I’m surprised she sees him at all.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Susan happens to mention that Shula said she’d like to thank Neil. Susan suggests that he might like to go now, but of course, if he’d rather stay here… But Neil is gone in a flash and on his way to the Stables. Both he and Shula say how lucky it was that he was on the spot; Shula could have been lying there for hours, otherwise. If Shula ever wants anything, she only has to call Neil, he tells her. But Shula is worried and says that people are starting to gossip about the amount of time they are spending together. Neil is incredulous – who are these people? When Shula admits that it’s really only Alistair, Neil dismisses it and reminds Shula that he and her are lifelong friends. And oh yes; here’s your phone back Shula.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Speaking of phones, is it legal to be on a mobile when riding a horse? Shula says that it was a stupid thing to do, and she emphasises this fact to her students. A cynic might say that, with this ‘don’t do what I do, just do what I say’ attitude, Shula ought to be in Government, but let’s keep politics out of the Archers. Going back to the legality or otherwise of mounted mobile activity, don’t you think that, if it isn’t illegal, then it ought to be? I’m not advocating using a phone while at the wheel of a car, but if it’s potential loss of control through only having one hand on the steering wheel/horse reins that is the issue, then I submit that a car is less likely to be spooked, or distracted by the smell of pigs (which was apparently the case with Shula’s mount, to get back to our narrative).</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Neil’s desire to be helpful soon annoys Shula – he pops round with a lasagne; should he put it in the oven? Oh, and he’s noticed that one of her spotlights needs replacing; has she got a spare and where is the stepladder? Shula is starting to feel pressured and tells Neil to go home, please. Now. He does so, leaving the stepladder in the hall. To be fair to Shula, she is frustrated as she has received an e-mail telling her that her ordainment placement has been postponed until she is free of her arm in plaster (which will be about six weeks).</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The stepladder is noticed by Alistair, when he calls round with some shopping. Shula tells him about Neil and the spotlight and Alistair apologises for what he said about Shula, Neil and the gossip. “I got it wrong” the vet says, contritely. There is a long pause, and then we hear Shula say: “Actually, I don’t think you did.” She goes on to tell him that nothing has been going on between her and Neil, but she is frightened of the way she is feeling and, when she fell and came round, she realised that it was Neil she wanted and she had a crystal-clear thought that “I can’t die, because, if I do, I’ll never see him again.” A shocked Alistair asks “You’re in love with him?” Shula replies that she doesn’t know, but Alistair must keep quiet. “No-one can ever know” his ex-wife insists.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We have spent a while on this story, but it’s not every week that you get a potential vicar committing an imaginary affair with a good friend. About time Shula got a story with some meat in it. </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Let’s look what’s been happening elsewhere. Josh, the errant Brookfield entrepreneur, appears to have cocked it up again, as the output from his hens is down by some 20% and there is an additional problem; his eggshells are paper thin and more fragile than Faberge eggs. Something is obviously wrong and, having secured a massive order from a customer, it needs to be sorted, so Alistair is brought in and he takes samples. Rooooth tells David not to interfere – let Josh sort it out by himself.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It turns out that the problem is that the hens have Infectious Bronchitis (no eggs for me please, Mr. Archer!) and the reason is that Josh took a ‘calculated risk’ by not giving them all their booster vaccinations. Make that ‘miscalculated risk’, Josh. There is much bickering about the times that other members of the Archer family have made mistakes, and Josh points out that he is not the only one. True, Josh, but you are the only one whose previous cock-ups have involved a police investigation and a stiff talking-to. So, asks David, how is he going to get out of this? The answer is to buy in free range eggs from other, reputable producers, explain to his customers that there has been a slight hiccup and to take the short-term financial hit in the expectation of long-term gains. Another triumph of business know-how, Josh.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over at Honeysuckle Cottage, Brian and Jennifer are babysitting Xander, aided and abetted by Ruairi, who has cooked them a very palatable meal, helped by hints from Chef Ian. The evening gets into a swing with games of Cluedo, at which Ruairi is a bit of a demon, apparently (the long, dark evenings must simply fly by). The talk turns to Alice and how she hid her illness (and the empty bottles) from them. Jennifer is disappointed, as she always thought (and hoped) that her children could talk to her about anything. Ruairi replies that he could tell her anything and, diverting attention from Brian’s suggestion that it was Professor Plum in the Ballroom, with a Spanner, casually mentions that he is Bisexual.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jennifer is at pains to accept this as a piece of news on par with ‘I’m thinking of getting a haircut’ and doesn’t miss a beat in the conversation. She cajoles Brian later for his lack of reaction, but he maintains that it was a tactic by Ruairi to sidestep the fact that Brian had the correct solution (sorry, but we never found out if he was right). Brian admitted that his reaction when Adam came out was unfortunate, but he was determined not to make the same mistake with Ruairi.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian adds that he shouldn’t really be surprised as “our children don’t really do ‘normal’, do they?” he asks Jennifer, adding that he is a bit of a dinosaur in these matters. “At least we did a good job with Ruairi” he tells Jenny, with the postscript that “I suppose one out of four isn’t too bad.” This seems a little harsh on Debbie, and indeed Adam, as, let’s face it, out of the Aldridge/Macy children, it is only Kate who could really be described as a complete flake and as mad as a box of frogs.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Of course, the above has omitted to include Alice, who we learned last week has gone to live with Amy Franks in Nottingham. Back in Ambridge, Chris and Susan are witnessing Martha’s first (and ultimately successful) attempts to sit up, unaided. Chris becomes tearful that Alice is missing all these landmark moments in her daughter’s life, and Susan suggests that they video them and save them, and even make a ‘memory box’ for Alice to look back on.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Chris wonders if he should ring Amy and ask to speak to Alice. Susan says it could be worth a try, but he should be prepared that she might not want to talk to him. Nevertheless, Chris goes ahead. Amy answers and, after the social chitchat, she says that she is frantically busy (she’s a midwife and there are lots of lockdown babies). Alice, says Amy, isn’t there. Just then, there is the click of a door and Amy says that it’s Alice going out – she thought that she had already left.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">How are things? Chris asks. Not good, Amy replies – things started OK, but Alice has started drinking and going (and staying) out late at night. Amy is struggling to cope, and Alice is getting angry and sneaking out to buy drink. Chris tells her that she shouldn’t have to be putting up with this sort of thing and, when Amy protests that Alice is her friend, but her work is stressful enough without worrying what she is going to come home to. </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Chris says yes, it’s true that Amy is Alice’s friend, but Alice is the responsibility of him and the family, not Amy. In a stern voice, Chris says “Alice should be here with us – it’s time for her to come home.” Well, good luck with that, Chris; personally, the only way I can see it happening is with her heavily sedated and bound hand and foot, slung from a long pole. Of course, alternatively they could give her a bottle of vodka and get her in the car and on the road after she has passed out. </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p>
</p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-54636473161616288762021-08-05T20:07:00.002+01:002021-08-05T20:07:33.614+01:00From Delusions Of Adequacy To Delusions Of Grandeur…<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wsLuJzpM344/YQw2ojUbXfI/AAAAAAAACsU/7ZKz4sTetfYR-tMhxTdBmz_7OMIyeX7twCLcBGAsYHQ/s238/images-3.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="238" data-original-width="188" height="238" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wsLuJzpM344/YQw2ojUbXfI/AAAAAAAACsU/7ZKz4sTetfYR-tMhxTdBmz_7OMIyeX7twCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/images-3.jpeg" width="188" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #1d1d1d; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Carole Boyd (Lynda Snell)</b></div><p></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">OK, let’s get it over with – it’s time for the Fete planning to begin in earnest. And this year it’s personal, to coin a phrase – Lynda reveals to Joy that Darrington have chosen to hold their fete on the same date as Ambridge and, even worse, the head of their fete committee is Evangeline - Lynda’s nemesis from the Mystery Plays fiasco – and, as Lynda tells Joy at a private committee pre-meeting, meeting (so that they can sort things out “before the trouble-makers get here” - Lynda’s phrase), Evangeline’s “sole purpose in life is to upstage me.” I wonder who bagsied the date first, but we’ll gloss over that.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Joy has had the idea of cowpat roulette, and Lynda sounds a little uncertain, but Tony has already agreed to provide both a cow and a field and Joy assures Lynda that “the kiddies will love it.” Having established the intellectual and cultural level of the fete, their thoughts turn to how can they wipe the floor with Darrington? Lynda’s suggestion is that they get a celebrity to open it and be a celebrity judge of the scarecrow competition – well, I suppose it is on a slightly higher intellectual plane than the cowpat roulette. The other members of the committee think that this is a boffo wheeze, but Lynda is dismayed when she gets a message from Jim, saying that he has already lined up a celebrity and she is keen to do it.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I may have poured scorn on the cowpat roulette idea earlier, but if it’s culture and learning that you are looking for, then Jim’s choice of celebrity will have you whooping with glee - yes, he has persuaded some woman academic (“a world-renowned Romance philologist” Jim tells Lynda, proudly) to take on the task. “Don’t they collect stamps?” asks Joy, which again speaks volumes about the intellectual level of the fete. Lynda is distraught and says that she realises that she will have to find a celebrity quickly.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">On Thursday, Lynda meets Lilian while they are out walking their dogs and Lynda unburdens herself to her friend – Lynda has contacted all the celebrities she knows and they have all turned her down flat, and there are only two weeks to go. Lilian asks why don’t they try to get the film star who will be opening a new ward (or something similar} at Borsetshire General a bit later on? Lynda seizes on this lifeline and quickly devises a plan to ensnare the celebrity. Lilian soon realises that she has been drafted in as an active participant in this drama and she is far from happy about it. Lynda, however, is implacable and rides roughshod over Lilian’s protests and arguments. It is, Lynda reminds her friend, all for the good of the fete and they have to succeed in order to upstage Darrington.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The plan couldn’t be simpler; the two women will make their way (separately) to the front of the crowd when the celebrity arrives and then Lilian will stage a dramatic fainting fit (and Lynda insists that it has to be a flat-out-on-the-pavement calibre of performance) Lynda will then step forward, administer “some sort of medical procedure” and receive the plaudits of the crowd as Lilian is miraculously revived. Once again, Lilian voices her misgivings, but, again, her objections are brushed aside.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The best-laid plans and all that; we learn later that the scheme was an unmitigated disaster – Lilian fainted spectacularly, but Lynda hadn’t taken into account the fact that Borsetshire General is a hospital and, before Lynda could reach Lilian, the latter was surrounded by swarms of doctors and assorted medics. (Incidentally, what is the collective noun for a group of doctors? A Prescription? A Dose [or Overdose]?)</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Whatever, Lilian spent two and a half hours in A&E and she is about as far away from being a happy camper as it is possible to get. Lynda bemoans the failure of her plan – it was going quite well, she thought. Suddenly, Lynda has a lightbulb moment – a chance remark of Lilian’s, about Lynda trying to use her status as an MBE to get through the crowd (presumably she thought that people would think that ‘MBE’ was some medical qualification) – makes her realise that all this talk of celebrity is superfluous; Ambridge already has its own home-grown celebrity – to wit, Lynda Snell MBE. Why didn’t she see it before? No need to look any further; Lynda Snell is on the case! </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It is this mindset that inspired the title of this week’s blog. At this rate, Lynda will have herself proclaimed Queen of Ambridge and, after paying their entrance money, her subjects will have to genuflect at her feet at her fete.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">While on the subject of happy campers and also touching on the earlier subject of cow dung (these blogs are not just thrown together, you know, but please bear with me) we have to report that Roy has finally met up with Leyla, his elusive telephone friend, for a meal in London. They are both nervous and, despite spending ages on phone calls, somewhat tongue-tied, but the ice is soon broken.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The waiter brings Leyla her starter, but it’s not what she ordered. Never mind, she says, as it’s quite nice, except for the blue cheese dressing, which she doesn’t like, but she’s happy enough to eat it – she doesn’t want to cause a fuss. Roy tells her that, at Grey Gables, they would rather be told if there had been a mistake, so that they can put it right.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">He then proceeds to give her a masterclass in how to complain properly. First of all, you grasp the waiter by the ears and repeatedly bang his head on the table, whilst shouting ‘that’s your tip gone west, you clueless git!’ Sorry about that – I was just recalling the last time that Neil, I and our partners went out for a meal and Neil was served a pie that didn’t have a pastry bottom and only had a puff pastry lid. We’ll never be allowed in that Michelin-starred restaurant again… [A stew with a pastry lid is not a pie, and that is the hill which I’m willing to die on - Neil].</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Moving on, Roy’s advice is to speak calmly to the waiter, explain the situation and give the restaurant the chance to make amends. In Leyla’s case, ‘amends’ means a couple of free desserts and she admits that she felt strangely empowered by the way she handled the situation.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The date goes well and Leyla says that she’d like to experience the countryside, and it’s her turn to travel, so why doesn’t she come to Ambridge later in the week for a day or two when her children are away? Roy is all for this, and agrees readily.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">So it is that, a few days later, Leyla turns up in Ambridge. She wants to experience the whole back-to-nature thing and she has booked in at the rewilding campsite for a night, having borrowed a tent off a friend. Roy decides that a second date is a bit early for a ‘meet the family’ experience and he asks Phoebe if she could make herself scarce during the day. Neither does he tell Leyla that his daughter is the manager of the rewilding project. Bearing in mind that Leyla is a biology teacher, she seems to have only a sketchy grasp of the names of the flora and fauna of the countryside around her, although she does find it impressive.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">She and Roy are getting closer, discussing ways of keeping warm in a tent at night, when they are suddenly interrupted when one of the longhorns pokes its head inside the tent, then proceeds to trample the tent into the ground, all the while showing why it should have been picked as the star of the ‘cowpat roulette’ fete attraction. The tent (which Leyla has borrowed from a friend) will never play the piano again, but Leyla is keen to exercise her new-found ability to keep calm and complain in a civilised manner, so she goes to see Phoebe in the Manager’s office.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Unfortunately for her, Roy returns, but, at the sight of him, dishevelled and covered in cow dung, Phoebe loses it completely and is overcome with hysterical laughter. Leyla finds this incredibly rude and is appalled at Phoebe’s behaviour. Even when Roy introduces Phoebe as his daughter, Leyla is not amused and says she is going back to London. Mind you, she had met Kate by this time, which couldn’t have helped.</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Roy is convinced that he is never going to find love, but Kate says why bother? Why not just go out and have a good time – no strings and no commitments? Roy explores some ladies on a website, asking for Kirsty’s advice. All I can say is that these aren’t the kind of girls that you would take home to mother (unless she is <i>very</i> liberal and broad-minded) and it seems a bit out of character for Roy. Having said that, remember it was a one-night stand in a tent at a music festival with Elizabeth that put the skids under his relationship with Hayley (can that really be as long ago as June 2014?)</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">While on the subject of relationships, Ian tells Helen that he is convinced that Adam is having an affair – he recognises the signs. To check it out, he goes through Adam’s messages and finds out that Adam has arranged to meet someone called Michael at a hotel in a nearby village this lunchtime. Isn’t trust between partners a beautiful thing? </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ian leaves Xander with Helen and hotfoots it off to said hotel, where he bursts in on Adam and Michael, who are having a drink in the bar, having had a convivial and successful meeting, that culminated in Michael offering Adam the post of Farm Manager. Ian has worked himself up into a frenzy and demands to know how long all this has been going on and why is Adam lying to him all over again?</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ian is in no mood to listen to reason and he stops just short of hitting Michael and/or Adam and keeps on demanding that they tell him the truth. In the end, Adam tells him the whole story of how he ‘borrowed’ money from one of the farm accounts when they were short of money, but he’s paid it all back now. Ian eventually calms down, but by now, Michael is concerned – does Adam mean that he embezzled from Home Farm? When Adam admits that this is what happened, Michael says that, in that case, Adam won’t be surprised to learn that he (Michael) is withdrawing his offer of a job and goodbye to them both. As Michael walks out, Adam asks Ian what on earth possessed him – he’s not just lost Adam a – very good – job but also his reputation. Ian replies that anything that Adam has lost is totally down to Adam and his secretive attitude. That’s as maybe, Ian, but your appearance at the interview and ranting like an insane, cuckolded husband didn’t help much, did it?</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Don’t worry readers – Ian and Adam end up declaring their love for each other (and Xander, of course) and resolve to trust each other more and behave better. Well, Adam will certainly have the time to work on the relationship; after all, he hasn’t got a job to go to now…</p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p>
</p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-86609964599766458422021-07-27T17:37:00.002+01:002021-07-27T17:37:41.643+01:00Welcome Home (Not)<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fCYQ4M51vSg/YQA2IdKPZtI/AAAAAAAACsA/Zdk5jzz4LiI6eOZclPiVlstk_e2N2gXpwCLcBGAsYHQ/s224/Unknown-22%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="224" data-original-width="169" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fCYQ4M51vSg/YQA2IdKPZtI/AAAAAAAACsA/Zdk5jzz4LiI6eOZclPiVlstk_e2N2gXpwCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-22%2B2.jpeg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Hollie Chapman (Alice Carter)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian and Adam seem to be getting along a bit better nowadays, which is strange, as Adam still seems to be doing most of the work round the farm. To be fair, Brian did offer to ring up to order the oil, or gas, or something similar. Adam is particularly upbeat, as he will be having an interview of sorts with an environmentalist and it’s looking hopeful. Nevertheless, he and Brian agree not to tell Ian or Jennifer just yet.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Suddenly, all thoughts of work are banished from their minds as Alice walks in, demanding the keys to the house, as she wants to get her stuff. Brian is thunderstruck – he’s paying an arm and a leg for Alice’s rehab, so what the hell is she doing back home? Alice announces that she has walked out of rehab, as it wasn’t doing her any good and she couldn’t stand it any longer, so just give her the keys please.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">She has decided that she has to leave Ambridge, as she cannot bear the thought of people talking about her in whispers and everybody just waiting for her to let them all down again. Where will she go? Alice replies that she is thinking about Bath, but Brian immediately scotches this idea – she has no money, no job and nowhere to live and she has picked one of the most expensive towns in the land; she’s living in fantasy land. Brian is being particularly nasty to his daughter (no doubt thinking of the waste of money) and his mood is made even worse when the rehab place say that they cannot discuss Alice’s case with him, as she has not given her consent. Alice says that she needs some space and leaves, while Jennifer tells Brian off and says that his remarks are not helping. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice takes refuge in the churchyard, where she is shortly joined by the Reverend Alan Franks. She opens up fractionally more to him, saying that rehab was so tough that she couldn’t stand it any longer. The vicar says that he is always there for her if needed, and he has an idea that may help.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">So it is that, later on, Alan calls in on Brian and Jennifer to sound them out about his idea. In a nutshell, the idea is that Alice should move in with Alan’s daughter Amy, who is a midwife in Nottingham, and whose long-term housemate has just moved out. Nottingham is far enough away from Ambridge and Amy (to whom Alan has explained the whole story) says she would be delighted to see her old friend again. As for Brian and Jennifer, they would have the security of knowing that Alice is living somewhere safe. Jenny thinks it’s an ideal solution and Brian says that it’s wonderful of Amy to offer to help. Too damn right it is – I wonder whether Amy realises just what she has taken on?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Meanwhile, over at Beechwood, all is not going well between Helen and one of her neighbours. His name is Kyle and he is using the local WhatsApp group to post nasty comments and messages about Helen’s past. This week he went into the shop and immediately began making sarcastic comments about the high prices and virtually accusing Helen of profiteering. When Helen makes some comment, he tells her that it’s a free country and he likes to speak his mind, so she had better get used to hearing what he’s got to say.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Helen is upset with herself for not standing up more for herself, and it gets worse when she and Lee go to the pub and Kyle is there, drinking a pint. Helen feels that she should stand up to Kyle and asks him why he keeps making the comments. In reply, Kyle is even more sarcastic, to the extent that Lee tells him to shut his mouth. Helen tries to calm Lee down and Kyle says that Lee should listen to Helen, as “she’s not a woman you’d want to disagree with, if you know what I mean.” Add to this that Kyle has called Helen; to her face’ “a nutjob” and “a criminal” and you get the impression that he really doesn’t like her.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">In fact, Kyle says that he and his wife Sarah moved into the Beechwood development because they wanted a nice place to live and to have their children and now Helen is spoiling it for everyone. Speaking personally, not since Martyn Gibson began getting longer speaking parts, have I taken such an instant dislike to a character, and I would willingly give him a good kicking until my legs ached.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">As such, I was delighted when Lee announced that he has something to tell her about Kyle which could be the answer to all their troubles. We aren’t told what it is right away, but Helen meets Kyle, who is as obnoxious as ever. It is here that he accuses Helen of spoiling his and Sarah’s enjoyment by living on the estate.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Funny that Kyle should mention enjoyment, says Helen, as his house overlooks Helen and Lee’s garden and they can see into Kyle’s spare bedroom and Lee noticed a woman visiting Kyle earlier on; a woman who certainly wasn’t Sarah. Lucky that Lee had his camera with him, and the photos have come out clear and sharp. Kyle asks is she threatening him? Not at all, Helen replies, but if Kyle doesn’t stop the nasty comments and doesn’t leaves the family in peace, she might just publish the pictures on the Group chat website “and don’t think that I haven’t got the nerve to do it” she adds, with a note of menace in her voice. Kyle goes to pieces quicker than an exploding hand grenade and says “Let’s just drop it, shall we?” The great thing is that Lee never took any photos in the first place! </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Roy’s love life – such as it is – continues to fascinate Phoebe and Kirsty. Roy still hasn’t met Leyla face to face, but Kirsty has a cunning plan; she has dug out a press cutting about some charity event, held by the school where Leyla teaches. There is a photograph of the schoolkids and three female teachers and, while the teachers are named, it doesn’t say which is which, so the great Leyla hunt continues, albeit slowly. Watch this space.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Let’s return to Alice for a moment. She goes to see Fallon to tell her that she is going to Nottingham and to say ‘goodbye’. When Fallon asks how long for, Alice is vague and noncommittal - all she will say is that Brian is driving her there and they will be leaving about four o’clock. She asks Fallon for a favour – will she keep an eye on Chris and Martha for her? Oh yes, and don’t tell Chris that she is leaving – she just wants to slip quietly away,</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">This puts Fallon in an awkward spot – she believes that it would be good if Alice and Chris met up, but she promised not to spill the beans about Alice’s impending exit from Ambridge. Fallon tries to drop subtle hints to Chris – far too subtle, as she eventually has to spell out in plain English that Alice is leaving and, to Fallon’s ears anyway, it sounded like she might not be coming back. Chris arrives at Brian and Jennifer’s before the 4pm deadline, but it is too late – apparently Brian couldn’t bear the sight of Jenny’s tear-stained face at the window and so he and Alice set off early and they were gone before Chris could meet and talk to his wife. Actually, I reckon that Alice was taking a chance travelling with Brian, as I wouldn’t put it past him to drive her back to rehab and dump her there (again) in order to get some value for the shedload of money that he’s paying out.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">What else has been happening? You will be delighted to know that Ben Archer has been accepted for his nursing degree course and he starts in September. This will mean a parting of the ways for the dynamic duo of Ben and Ruairi, as Ruairi is banking on getting good enough results to go to university in London and, from the things he is saying, I somehow don’t think it’s the quality of the academic teaching that is the main attraction of life in the capital.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">If you cast your mind back to the opening paragraph of this week’s blog, you may recall that Brian and Adam agreed not to say anything about Adam’s possible job prospects – all for the very best of motives of not upsetting Ian and Jennifer; can you imagine how Jenny would take on if both Alice and Adam were to leave Ambridge permanently?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Anyway, here we have a case of adding two and two and making five, as, although Brian and Adam are working from the best of motives, these can be misunderstood and misinterpreted. Ian has noticed that Adam is increasingly away with the fairies and often in a world of his own. On Thursday, Adam takes a call from the man to discuss the potential job. Ian remarks that Adam seemed a bit jumpy, and who was it that rang? Adam replies that it was Lee, who wants some help with the tree house.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">That evening, Ian is meeting up with Helen and he asks her if Lee needs his help with the tree house? Helen is mystified – the tree house is practically finished and Lee can easily cope with the final details. Not only that, but Helen has been at home with Lee all afternoon and she never saw him make any phone call.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ian is upset and he tells Helen that Adam is lying to him and he’s very much afraid that Adam is having an affair – after all he has form in this area, having been unfaithful before. Helen urges him to talk to Adam, which, if you think about it, is good advice, as if the two men were to talk, then the whole misunderstanding could be put right in no time at all. But Ian doesn’t know what to do – the last time this happened, he swore that, if it ever happened again, he’d walk out, but things are different now – now they have Xander to consider. What can Ian do?</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-50172384809555148052021-07-22T15:00:00.004+01:002021-07-22T15:00:55.862+01:00♪♪ “Get me to the church on time…” ♪♪<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BLkmYX5UD7w/YPl53KEn02I/AAAAAAAACr0/tbViprTrC6IfHQzRJ4Q-0dY_O5CWcVf7wCLcBGAsYHQ/s173/Unknown-21%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="173" data-original-width="173" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-BLkmYX5UD7w/YPl53KEn02I/AAAAAAAACr0/tbViprTrC6IfHQzRJ4Q-0dY_O5CWcVf7wCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-21%2B2.jpeg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Adrian (Greg Hobbs)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Last week we were introduced to Mr. York, or ‘Yam Yam’ as he was known to his pupils, one of whom was Ed Grundy. We learn this through a series of misadventures and cock-ups, involving – who else? – the Grundys. At first it seems like Eddie has, at last, hit upon a sure-fire, money-making scheme – as he tells Clarrie as he phones her from the limo one evening, all he has to do is to drive a band of stag party men around a pre-planned pub crawl route.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">They are having a whale of a time, says Eddie and, at the moment, are playing leapfrog in the grounds of the White Eagle. His chauffeuring duties complete, Eddie returns home, to tell a well-impressed Clarrie that, although his service was offered free to his passengers, they generously tipped him £200. But that’s not the end to it, as Eddie, when checking that nothing has been left in the limo (personally, I reckon he was hoping to find the odd misplaced wallet) finds a man asleep on the back seat. And not just any man, as it is Adrian, the bridegroom, who is deep in alcohol-induced unconsciousness and cannot be woken up. Even worse, he is getting married at 9.30 am, or some similar, God-forsaken hour.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">What to do? Eddie is all for turning him out on the grass and leaving him there, but Clarrie points out that, besides being an un-Christian act, it would do bugger-all for the reputation of the fledgling limo transport service. They set off for the house of Terry Two-Phones, where they last stopped and everyone (as they thought) got out of the limo. Maybe so, or maybe not, but they cannot raise any answer from inside the house, despite (presumably) trying both of Terry Two-Phones’ two phones. The only answer is to return to Grange Farm, taking the still-comatose form of Adrian York with them.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Fast forward to breakfast, and Ed arrives to help his dad out at the market, or similar. Ed is a tad taken aback to see a middle-aged man at the breakfast table, dressed in his (Ed’s) best suit. Not only that, but his face looks familiar… Eddie comes in and tells son Ed that there has been a change of plan – there is not time for Adrian to get home and change, so Eddie has lent him Ed’s best suit. Not only that, but Adrian cannot remember the way to the hotel where the ceremony is to take place, so Eddie will drive, while Ed navigates. On the way, Ed suddenly realises who their guest is – he’s Mr York; known to the kids as ‘Yam Yam’, who taught PE at Borsetshire High. Mr York (who seems to have fully recovered) reveals that he remembers the Grundy brothers, who were known to the staff as ‘Gormless 1 and Gormless 2’</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">This leads to much bickering, until Eddie tells Gormless 2 to shut up and which exit does he need at the roundabout? Eventually they reach the hotel in time, and Mr. York lets it be known that he’s glad that George has finished school, as he’d hate the story to get about. Eddie replies that Mia Grundy was staying with them, and she might well have noticed Mr Y asleep in the limo (by which we infer that Eddie let him spend the night there to sleep it off) but if Mr. Y could see his way to offering a bit of an incentive, Eddie might be able to see if he could persuade Mia to keep shtum…</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Mr. York eventually stumps up another £150, which must make it a very expensive Stag Night, and goes off to get hitched, no doubt trying to think up a convincing story as to why his trousers appear to have had an argument with his shoes (Yam Yam is 6’ 4” – a good three or four inches taller than Ed.) Eddie, meanwhile, is jubilant and, in a fit of generosity, offers his son £40 for his help. Not so fast, says not-so-G2; he’d hate to have to tell Mr. Y that Mia is not actually staying with them this week and it will cost Eddie £100 to buy Ed’s silence. Eddie grumbles, but hands over the money, remarking “You drive a hard bargain.” “I learned from the best” his son replies, gleefully trousering the century.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Looking back, last week was a week in which silent characters came to the fore, so to speak; we have already been introduced to Terry Two Phones and there is Kyle at Beechwood (of whom more later), plus Roy seems to have found himself a young lady online. Her name is Leyla, and Roy is a bundle of nerves as he gets ready for their first, real life date. His agitation is not lost on daughter Phoebe, who questions her father. She becomes suspicious when Roy reveals that he has never actually seen a photo of Leyla, as she is shy of appearing on social media, as is Roy.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">What does she do for a living? She’s a teacher. So how come she gets time off to catch a train to Ambridge during the week? She works part time, Roy replies. Why is there zero trace of her on social media? Roy repeats the story of her shyness, but Phoebe is unconvinced and wonders if Leyla could be a ‘Catfish’ (and before you ask, no, I do not have an idea what that means, but I don’t think it’s a compliment). Roy replies that he’s a big boy now and he is very savvy about the dangers of online dating, thank you very much.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Despite his confidence, he returns home early, and alone. Not only that, but he never actually got to meet Leyla face to face. So what happened? Well, you’re not going to believe this, but, despite booking her ticket in advance, Leyla’s train was cancelled. Absolutely spot-on Roy – you are absolutely correct; I don’t believe it for one minute.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Before we move on, there appears to have been a case of alien abduction at Brookfield; Rooooth and Pip are off to market to buy some cows to expand the herd. Rooooth was looking for 25 or so beasts, but only 15 met her stringent standards. Nevertheless, David was in happy mood all morning and was even heard whistling – and no, it wasn’t the Dead March from <i>Saul </i>– Ben is bemused by the change in his father, describing it as “weird; but I could get used to it.”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Bearing in mind that we had a period of many months a few years ago when Ben Archer never uttered a single syllable, this – admittedly rather contrived and somewhat tenuous – link brings us to silent character number three – Kyle, a resident of Beechwood. Lee has signed up to the residents’ WhatsApp group and is distressed at some of the comments that are being posted; notably those referring to Helen and repeating the lurid press headlines concerning her trial for attempted murder of her husband, Rob. Comments along the lines of ‘is it safe for your children to play alongside Helen’s kids’? do nothing to improve Lee’s mood.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Joy tells him that she removed Kyle from the site, but another member reinstated him. By this time, Lee is just the other side of incandescent and storms out, threatening to give Kyle a piece of his mind. Helen begs him not to – she appreciates that she cannot stop people saying or thinking whatever they want, but the only way she can stay in control is by staying calm. But by this time, Lee is gone.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Joy tells Helen that she is loved and respected by friends and family, and she asks her not to be too hard on Lee – he’s only doing it because he loves Helen. Just then, Lee returns, all apologetic, because he realised that his behaviour was not what Helen wanted – in fact, he never got to Kyle’s, although all he really wanted was to punch his head in.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Helen says ‘thank you’, but she only really wants Lee to be there for her when she needs him. Joy says that she ought to be going, but isn’t it a pity that there’s no way of getting back at Kyle? Let’s pause here for reflection – Kyle sounds like a middle-aged saddo who gets his kicks by trolling people on social media, while Lee is a personal trainer, who holds a black belt in karate. Wouldn’t it be interesting if they were to meet up late one dark and moonless night for a chinwag?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-50806255203738389922021-07-12T13:03:00.000+01:002021-07-12T13:03:06.248+01:00They Tried To Make Me Go To Rehab<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-D61IB_Cw2dI/YOwvGL5dYUI/AAAAAAAACrk/yc4MYcntOSgBZWCLSHrBYU-R1wPJ8qIrQCLcBGAsYHQ/s263/Unknown-19%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="263" data-original-width="192" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-D61IB_Cw2dI/YOwvGL5dYUI/AAAAAAAACrk/yc4MYcntOSgBZWCLSHrBYU-R1wPJ8qIrQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-19%2B2.jpeg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"> </span><b style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Hannah Young (Sandra)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice is getting ready for rehab and the last person she probably needs to pop round is Kate, which is exactly what happens. Alice has found out that Peggy has been speaking to Chris about Alice’s alcoholism since New Year’s and she’s not happy. Kate can hardly believe it and asks what right Peggy has interfering in Alice’s life - that’s rich coming from her! She’s all for going round and sorting her out but Alice says that she’ll go and see her on her own.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Peggy is sorry for interfering but she’s proud of her granddaughter now that she’s accepting help, and Alice accepts that Peggy may have been right after all in putting Martha’s interests first. Kate is still there when Alice gets back and after a few cross words she persuades Kate not to go round and tell her Gran what’s what and, to paraphrase Amy Winehouse, tells her sister “They tried to make me go to Rehab, but I said yes, yes, yes”</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Meanwhile Lynda, Shula and Joy are meeting to plan the fete, or rather Lynda and Shula are as Lynda has suggested that’s Joy’s role should be as an observer for the first few meetings. Lynda’s big idea for a theme is the Pandemic, specifically lockdown, but Shula suggests that people would have had enough by then. ‘Observer’ Joy suggests making scarecrows but Lynda pooh-poohs the idea as it’s been done before - 10 years ago! Shula loves the idea though and suggests putting it to the full committee, and Lynda reluctantly agrees. It looks like the committee loves it too as later at the tearoom Fallon praises Lynda for the scarecrow idea and she’s forced to admit that it was Joy’s idea and not hers, and confesses that her pride is somewhat hurt. Fallon tells her not to worry - she’s still ‘the boss” as far as Ambridge events are concerned.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Fallon confides in Lynda that Alice is going to rehab for a month and that she’s worried about her. Lynda sees similarities with the position she was in after the fire at Grey Gables, and it was only through the kindness of her friends that she was able to rebuild her life. Alice will need her friends too - friends like Fallon.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Back to Kate who’s avoiding Peggy but in true Kate style seems to be taking it to extremes. She turns up at Jakob’s surgery to suggest she moves out of Peggy’s house and moves in with him. Jakob’s fresh from operating on a horse and is covered in blood. Desperate as he is for a shower he wants to know what Kate’s doing there. His reaction when she tells him is characteristically direct in pointing out that they tried it before and it didn’t work (I remember him describing how she left his flat looking like a disaster zone), but he can detect an ulterior motive and his persistence wrenches the real reason from her. Jakob’s horrified that Kate would just move out and leave Peggy on her own. It seems that something that moved out a long time ago is Kate’s compassion as she says she won’t be made to feel guilty for leaving her ‘horrible old gran’ on her own.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We catch up with Alice when she’s being driven to her rehab clinic by Brian. I must say, she sounds very calm considering the struggles that have taken place to get her there. So calm in fact that I wonder whether her frequent stops at service stations are less about needing a pee than needing to get pissed. Brian calls the clinic to explain that they’re running late and they seem suspicious too. Brian goes looking for Alice and shouts into the Ladies where he thinks she is but there’s no reply - probably because she’s found a pub and is calmly having a drink in the garden. It takes Brian an hour to find her and when he does she says she’s not going to rehab - no, no, no.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian has a plan though. He gets Alice to think she’s convinced him that she doesn’t need to go after all, then gets himself a gin and tonic and his daughter a vodka and orange. It doesn’t take long for Alice to realise that she’ll be easier to take to rehab if she’s drunk. They argue, he manhandles her into the car (worryingly no-one seems to question this) and they eventually get there. After checking her in and leaving her in the care of the clinic’s manager Sandra, he leaves with Alice’s words ringing in his ears - “I hate you Dad”. That’s not what Brian’s telling everyone in Ambridge though, apparently she went in “quiet as a lamb”.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">He can’t keep it bottled up though and he confesses to Eddie that the trip to rehab was a nightmare and puts him in the picture about what really happened. He can’t understand how things got so bad without him realising, but Eddie sympathises telling Brian he felt exactly the same way when Will was in a bad way. Brian is the only person outside the family who knows how bad things really were with Will, and Eddie is eternally grateful for his confidence.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Finally, we get back to an agricultural storyline. Well, when I say agricultural I mean Shula’s garden, which is as close as we’re going to get this week. Neil’s anxious to pay off his debt to Shula by finishing her garden and I can’t tell you how relieved I am that they’re not having the affair Alistair thought they were having. He is spending an awful long time there though, and who can blame him. At Shula’s he can take his time in the garden being fed a constant supply of tea and chocolate digestives, while back at Ambridge View he and Susan are at each others throats as the strain of holding down two jobs while looking after Martha is starting to take it’s toll on the couple.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It doesn’t get any better when Shula turns up to return Neil’s secateurs that he left behind, and Susan learns of the extent of the work he’s been doing for her. Miffed, to say the least, Susan leaves telling Neil to stay and chat with “your friend Shula!”</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Still, it could have been worse - she could have been returning the clothes he changed out of two weeks ago.</p>
<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-5635338309746996252021-07-06T18:07:00.000+01:002021-07-06T18:07:23.126+01:00The Story of Solomon<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0jR_wuwfuXk/YOSNTeE5LFI/AAAAAAAACrY/qzDhC_NFnGwGYa2VOUgb1fBa1Sm6oTytgCLcBGAsYHQ/s1000/Luke-Nunn%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1000" data-original-width="1000" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-0jR_wuwfuXk/YOSNTeE5LFI/AAAAAAAACrY/qzDhC_NFnGwGYa2VOUgb1fBa1Sm6oTytgCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/Luke-Nunn%2B2.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Lule Nunn (Sol)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Welcome to a brand new week and welcome to Sol, a new character who has arrived in Ambridge with a bit of a bang - as it were, and dominates this week’s summary. Solomon is a work colleague of Lily’s and she’s just woken up in his bed after what Sol described as a rampant sexathon. </p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Their reminiscences of the night before are cut rudely short when Lily remembers she should be at Lower Loxley running things while Elizabeth and Vince are on holiday. As it happens there was something groaning all night at Lower Loxley too. No, not Elizabeth and Vince, but the plumbing, which Freddie is tasked with getting fixed.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over breakfast Elizabeth is talking to Vince about the film Love Actually which she describes as having ‘something for everyone’. Perhaps my most hated phrase so often used to describe something which has no outstanding features or is a phrase lazily clutched at by presenters on programmes such as repeat offenders Countryfile - “ooh, the (substitute the geographic area of your choice) has something for everyone”. I won’t single out any particular presenter but let’s just say it really grates on me when spoken in a Cumbrian accent. Also “you literally couldn’t make it up”. Yes you could. That’s what making it up LITERALLY means. Argh! But I digress.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Freddie’s horrified to learn that Elizabeth and Vince’s plans have changed as there was a mix-up with their booking, so now they’re having a staycation - at Lower Loxley. Freddie was hoping to have his mates over and when Lily comes home her immediate priorities are strong coffee and a shower, not listening to her mother.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Timing, as they say, is everything. On the morning after Lily’s extracurricular activities, Russ learns that his decree absolute has come through and he is therefore no longer married, and can’t wait to tell Lily! When they see each again Lily senses something different about his demeanour and assumes he must know about what she’s been up to. She confides in Rex that she was having a really good time with Sol but is now feeling awful about cheating on Russ. Rex doesn’t see much of a problem as she clearly seems to like him and maybe there’s something lacking in her relationship with Russ.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">In a different sense Russ also feels like a new man. He’s begun painting again and is creating himself a new studio, leaving Freddie in charge of lighting an exhibition of oversized paintings by a new promising artist. The first painting to emerge from Russ’ new studio will be a portrait of Lily, and she will be the first person to see it. That might not be the unveiling Russ is expecting as Lily thinks she should confess all. But before she gets the chance, she runs into Sol who’s turned up to Lower Loxley on a works do for the first night of the drive-in movies, not realising she lives there. Things are a bit awkward between them as they stand in the field and he now knows about Russ, but says he’s cool with that and he’d like them to stay friends.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">When she finally sees Russ he shows her the decree absolute and tells her how he feels and says its a new start for them. He then unveils the portrait which she calls exquisite - no, he say, it’s her that’s exquisite. “I love you” she tells him, which probably means she won’t be confessing her night of passion with another man after all.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">While looking around the estate Vince happens upon Freddie with his Shire horse, Cranford Crystal. Vince is impressed with the size of the beast but does himself a mischief trying to climb onto the horse to have his photo taken. It might be the pain of his strained groin which makes him rather short tempered with Elizabeth later on when she tries to advise him on an issue he’s having with his Operations manager. Things lighten up over dinner when Freddie recounts the incident with ‘Crannie’ and Vince even suggests they watch the video Freddie took of the inelegant dismount.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The plumbing is still being fixed so Elizabeth and Vince decamp to the bridal suite where it will be quieter, but they don’t bargain on Vince’s mother, Iris, turning up the next morning looking for her ‘Vincie’ or ‘Babs’ as she calls him. Her visit is unexpected and Vince is very keen to persuade his mother to leave but she insists on ‘doing her rounds’. This appears to consist of seeking out anyone she can to ask about Elizabeth to make sure she’s right for her boy and not after his money. Her forensic questioning leads her to conclude that they are indeed right for each other, but Elizabeth should take care with her soft-hearted son.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Elizabeth accompanies Vince to the drive-in movie night in Vince’s Rolls Royce and they reflect on the week. Vince thinks he’s messed things up but Elizabeth reassures him. In fact she does more than that by telling him she loves him. She loves him but she can’t live with him, which is an arrangement they both seem more than happy with.</p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">This week, as one relationship settles down, another threatened to implode. But how refreshing to have an affair started and finished, with all loose ends tidied up, all in the same week. </p>
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<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">How unlike The Archers.</p>
<p style="background-color: white; color: #1f1d1e; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-16959414552164114742021-06-29T20:13:00.001+01:002021-06-29T20:13:22.179+01:00Alistair Detects A Spark In Shula’s Demeanour<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-b8xW1-wE_o8/YNtwmb777EI/AAAAAAAACrQ/Ql6DvQLnKEIX0larcrrKdyWtkDDaztbWACLcBGAsYHQ/s392/240px-ShulaArcher%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="392" data-original-width="240" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-b8xW1-wE_o8/YNtwmb777EI/AAAAAAAACrQ/Ql6DvQLnKEIX0larcrrKdyWtkDDaztbWACLcBGAsYHQ/s320/240px-ShulaArcher%2B2.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Judy Bennett (Shula Hebden Lloyd)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">At the beginning of the week, we learn that Shula is one year into her Ordination course and it has involved a lot of reading and writing. She tells Alice (who has come to see her horse Banjo) that at times, she is just grateful to be around horses at the Stables. There is a slightly awkward moment when Alice asks if she can take Banjo out? Shula says that it is up to Alice, but she must promise 1. That Banjo will be totally safe in her care, and 2. That Alice has not been drinking today. In the end, Alice decides that it is enough just to groom Banjo and talk to him.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">But what’s all this about a spark? I hear you ask. Patience, dear reader; we will get to that, although we listeners had to wait until Thursday. Meanwhile, Neil is getting earache from Susan, who is getting a bit ratty because of lack of sleep due to night feeds for Martha. Susan is also stressing because she and Neil haven’t spent a lot of time with their other grandchildren. So it is that we see Neil out for a walk with Martha, and he drops into the Stables to talk over an idea with Shula – how about riding lessons for Keira?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Shula thinks it would be a good idea, and suggests that they let Keira try it out to see if she likes it. Not only that, but Shula would like to help, so the first lesson or two would be on the house. Neil protests that this isn’t why he asked and so he and Shula arrive at a compromise – she will provide a free lesson or two and Neil will tidy up her garden, which it apparently needs. This atmosphere of amiability is broken by Susan, frantically squawking on the phone to her husband – where is he? Doesn’t he remember that Susan is supposed to be taking Martha to the Aldridges to see Jenny? No he doesn’t, is the short answer, so that’s another couple of Brownie Points gone west.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">However, a riding lesson is arranged for Keira later in the week and Neil turns up at the Stables, saying that he might as well get started on the gardening, which he does. Shula is concerned about the weather forecast, but Neil is optimistic – wrongly so, as it turns out, as the rain descends in Biblical proportions and he and Shula are soaked to the skin. She suggests they get inside before one of them drowns, and this they do. As luck would have it, Alistair turns up, just in time to see Neil coming down the stairs, clad in one of Dan’s old tracksuits – a Harry Potter one, to be accurate. It doesn’t fit very well, which is reassuring, as Dan is an officer in the Tank Regiment and I cannot help thinking that him having such attire to wear around barracks would do sod-all for his street cred in the Regiment, nor would it command the respect of the men under his command, I venture to suggest.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">By the way, if you are concerned about Keira during this downpour, then don’t be; they threw her in the Am just before it began, so she couldn’t get any wetter. Sorry, that’s a complete fabrication – her lesson was taking place in the indoor school, so she was bone dry throughout. Mind you, I prefer my version of events.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">But back to the Shula, Neil, Alistair scenario. Remember, Alistair has seen Neil coming downstairs, looking like an aged and podgy Harry Potter, and Shula starts an uncontrollable fit of the giggles – in fact, she laughs her head off. Alistair offers Neil some old clothes that he has at the office, and Neil accepts gratefully, dons said clothes and goes to collect Keira and take her home.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Shula is still doing her impression of the Laughing Policeman and tells Alistair that she hasn’t laughed like that for years; “The neighbours will think I’m having an affair!” she jokes. And not just the neighbours, it seems, as Alistair is silent. Shula picks up on this and says the very idea is preposterous. “Is it?” he asks, and points out that Neil and Shula do have some history, back in the day. More than that; he has seldom seen her so happy recently and he thinks he might have glimpsed a spark of happiness – of radiance, even, plus she was a little bit flirty, he adds, and you know how easily gossip can start. Yes – just tell Susan.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Shula rubbishes the very idea and says that she and Neil are just good friends and, if she didn’t know better, she would say that her ex-husband was jealous. “You couldn’t be more wrong” she tells Alistair. Come on Alistair; Shula is halfway to becoming a priest, and I’m pretty sure that committing adultery – even with some poor sod married to Susan – would be frowned upon by the church authorities, so stop this silly storyline now, please, scriptwriters.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Elsewhere, Eddie’s scheme to offer people lifts in the limo (free of charge, although if you force it on him, he will accept a tip, or a contribution towards running costs – then he might unlock the doors and let you out) seems to be a nice little earner. Jill gave him £20 when he took her and Leonard to The Bull. £20! If you are talking about one end of Ambridge from the other, it cannot be more than two or three miles, tops, surely? No wonder that Clarrie (and here is an excellent example of the triumph of hope over experience) says that she thinks he might be on to something this time, and she has dug out Joe’s old driving gloves, which he wore when he took Bartleby out in the trap – and whatever happened to Bartleby and Gem, I wonder? To cap it all (and yes, I am making a pun) she has found a chauffer’s hat.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We had a clash of two mighty intellects, when Rex and Eddie met up when Rex had been shopping. Eddie says that Rex should organise himself better and have just one weekly shopping trip “like Peggy Woolley does”. Rex corrects him “<i>did, </i>you mean” and goes on to explain that he always used to take Peggy to Underwoods once a week, but this week she rang him and said he wouldn’t be needed. Rex then notices that Eddie is wearing a suit and tie, and is he going on somewhere? Eddie replies that he is taking Lynda out for a ride in his limo, as a ‘thank you’ for organising the Fete, yet again. He’s then taking her to the Tea Room for cake and coffee. Rex doesn’t notice anything suspicious about this.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">There’s a bit of backstory needed here, as Eddie rang Lynda earlier, ostensibly to congratulate her on doing the Fete again. Lynda says that you’d think it would organise itself by now, but once again she has to shoulder the burden. “It needs a concept; an inspiring vision to give it shape,” she tells him, adding that “years of doing it have left my inspirational cupboard somewhat bare.” Tell you what Lynda, why not make this year’s theme ‘Pretentious Claptrap’? Eddie however has an idea – what she needs is a break, and what better than a ride in a limo? Lynda is persuaded and says that she would really like to be driven to Darrington.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Fast forward to 4.45 pm and Rex is at the Tea Room, talking to Lynda. Lynda relates her trip to Darrington, where she instructed Eddie to drive slowly past Evangeline Lowminster’s (the organiser of Darrington’s Mystery Plays) house and hoot his horn. Evangeline emerged, just as Lynda gave her a regal wave, then turned and bolted indoors. In a voice dripping with smugness, Lynda told Rex how much she enjoyed it.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It would appear that Rex’s mental gears have been engaged, but, like the Mills of God, they grind exceeding slowly. Rex has put together the limo, the lack of customers for his taxi, and Eddie’s smart attire and realised that Eddie has been poaching his customers. Just then, Eddie returns and Rex confronts him – he has been poaching Rex’s regular customers, and the more work that Eddie gets, the less there is for Rex. Eddie protests that he offers the service for free, but if people want to give him a tip, or expenses, who is he to refuse? In response, Rex says that he’s pretty sure it’s not legal (ask him if he declares it as earned income to HMRC, Rex) and Lynda steps in as peacemaker – how would it be if Eddie continued offering his ‘free service’ (my inverted commas) to the village, but agreed not to poach Rex’s regular customers? There is much grumbling from both sides, but they agree. Rex says “But I’m warning you Eddie – I’ll be watching you.”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The main story of the week involved Adam. On the eve of his birthday, he invites Lee round for a few beers. Ian is at home and, when Lee asks Adam how did he get on with clearing the air with Brian, Adam begs him to keep his voice down, as Ian knows nothing about the row between Adam and Brian – and that’s the way Adam would like it to stay for now.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ian wants to sound the other two out about an idea he has had – supplying mobile artisan food. I must admit I had the vision of a sort of upmarket fish and chip van. Adam is appalled at Ian’s timing and asks where would they get the money from? Ian replies that he is sure that they could find enough for a van, but only Adam knows that they couldn’t afford a bicycle with a box on the back, never mind a van. Ian appeals to Lee – what does he think? This puts Lee on the spot, and, to Ian’s disgust, he sides with Adam. Ian warns that he won’t give up on his idea.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The next day, at Home Farm, Brian tells Adam that he’s got to go to Ambridge View to take Chris’s birthday present and it quickly becomes obvious that Brian has totally forgotten that it’s Adam’s birthday too. He only finds out when Brian asks why is there a cake on his desk? “It’s from mum for my birthday” Adam replies and, to his credit, Brian is mortified and apologises, blaming the stress of the Alice situation. The two of them start talking about the current situation at Home Farm and it soon deteriorates into the usual slanging match, which ends when Adam says perhaps what he needs is a fresh start. Brian says fine, but can Adam at least stay until harvest is over? They agree not to tell the family just yet – a wise decision, I reckon, as if Jenny thought Adam was leaving, she would go totally Orang Utan poo and Brian’s life would be made hell.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Adam decides to put out a few feelers (well, one actually) and he asks Justin what would happen if a rival farmer bid for the BL contract? Justin replies that they would have to consider it, but it would be a foolish farmer that tried to undercut Brian. “Your stepfather has a well-deserved reputation for ruthlessness” he explains, and goes on to say that Brian could make things very difficult for a potential rival. Justin is well aware what Adam is getting at and offers some advice; he thinks that if a hypothetical farmer wanted to go his own way, it would be so much better to make a completely fresh start and not just do a different version of the same thing time after time. Adam thanks him for being so helpful. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">There’s your answer Adam – a completely fresh start is what’s needed, so forget farming and forget Home Farm. As it happens, I might know of a chef who could be looking for a delivery driver for his newly-created artisan food delivery venture…</p><div><br /></div>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-10517081905079282212021-06-22T19:24:00.001+01:002021-06-22T19:24:33.476+01:00And Don’t Call Them ‘Dollies’, Joy<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dyhY_HbfSX4/YNIqj0toJqI/AAAAAAAACrI/yRiJK0HNEEM8fy2FOFuRHtAJBFgjbYsawCLcBGAsYHQ/s225/Unknown-18%2B2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dyhY_HbfSX4/YNIqj0toJqI/AAAAAAAACrI/yRiJK0HNEEM8fy2FOFuRHtAJBFgjbYsawCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-18%2B2.jpeg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="color: #262626; font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Jackie Lye (Joy Horville)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Over at Beechwood, Joy is babysitting while Helen and Lee take in a drive-in movie at Lower Loxley. As well as the film, one of the attractions is ‘woodland raised pulled pork’ on the Orangery menu, which both agree is delicious. Just hang on a minute here – ‘woodland raised’? – the pigs have only been at Lower Loxley for about a fortnight, during which time they have been slaughtered and butchered; I respectfully submit that there are punters who attended an evening at ‘Deck the Halls’ who have spent more time at Lower Loxley than Rex’s pigs. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">But never mind. Helen phones Joy to see how she is coping, and she says that the boys are having the time of their lives – Jack found some figures in a cupboard upstairs and the boys have had a great time, making up stories and playing with the dollies. Helen is horrified – the so-called ‘dollies’ are part of Lee’s collection of Marvel heroes, lovingly collected over many years and kept in pristine condition. Indeed, as we learn later, some of them have never been taken out of their boxes.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Well, they have now, and some of the boxes are worse for wear, so eager were the boys to get their hands on the figures. Joy suggests that Helen trawls the Internet, to see if she can replace the boxes. She does so, but is appalled to be quoted a price in excess of US$ 200 for one figure – as she points out to Joy, that particular figure they have is perfectly intact, and she is not going to pay $200 for a cardboard box.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It’s time to ‘fess up to Lee and the two women do it together. He is less than happy and it is now that we learn that some of the figures have never been removed from their boxes, when Lee remarks that Wolverine’s claws are soft plastic, and not the hard plastic that he had imagined. Helen points out that this is probably so as not to hurt the children who play with them. Lee is almost in a state of shock, and is not comforted when Joy tells him that “it’s only the boxes – the dollies are all OK.”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">When Joy tells him how happy the boys were, playing with the figures, Lee (still holding Wolverine) realises that the figures were designed to be played with and says that “these things happen” and perhaps he can let Jack and Henry have access to some of the less-valuable figures. Lee ls obviously one of those people you see occasionally on programmes like Antiques Roadshow, who still have their boyhood toys in their original boxes. ‘Lucky them’ I always think, as, when I was younger, if a cousin – or an acquaintance – came to our house, and my toys were visible, my mother would see them playing with them, say to me ‘you don’t play with that very often, do you?’ and let them take my Sunbeam Alpine home.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Still, I’m not bitter (well, actually I am, but there is nothing to be done about it more than half a century later, so we’ll move on). Joy featured prominently last week, as Fallon recommended her to Lynda for the Fete committee. Lynda arranged for Joy to call round “for an interview” and was put out when Joy said “it’s hardly like running the Bank of England, is it?” Lynda’s sniff made it plain that she considers organising the Fete as much more complicated and definitely much more important.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">However, Lynda might have met her match in Joy, as Joy relates how she started up a majorette troupe for her daughter and raised funds to provide batons, costumes and the like and, when these were stolen, Joy started from scratch and did the whole thing over again. Lynda says to Joy that she can come along to the next meeting and Lynda expects that Joy will be content to listen quietly and learn. Ha! In your dreams Mrs Snell, I reckon.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It’s a big week for Phoebe and Rex, who are ready to welcome their first camping families to the Rewilding project. They have made a conscious decision to start small. Roy visits the site and asks if there’s anything he can do to help. “We do know what we’re doing, dad” Phoebe replies, a trifle haughtily, so Roy goes off to work.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Phoebe and Rex congratulate themselves on being prepared, until Phoebe mentions the solar-powered lights for the loos – has Rex set them up? No – he thought that Phoebe was taking delivery of them first thing. Much arguing and a phone call later, it transpires that the firm did try to deliver the lights earlier, but because nobody was around, they took them away again. They cannot deliver again until tomorrow and Rex and Phoebe are terrified that their guests will be stumbling around in the dark, trying to find the loo – imagine how bad the reviews are going to be!</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Where can they turn? Roy to the rescue! He calls in a few favours from his extensive list of contacts and before you know it, a solar generator is installed and lights are working. Roy says that he tells everybody about the Rewilding project and how proud he is of his clever daughter – proud too that she had the guts to start up her own business; something that he has never done. Father and daughter share a moment and a hug.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">From family bonding, we move to the opposite end of the spectrum, with yet more friction and controversy at Home Farm - specifically between Brian and Adam (no change there, then). The trouble starts brewing on Monday, when Brian visits the office, where Adam is working late. Brian is going through the farm accounts, and he finds a puzzling discrepancy.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian is actually looking to see if it would be possible for him to take his share of the Farm’s profits earlier than planned, as Alice’s rehab is going to cost considerably more than he expected. However, looking at the figures, it seems that the machinery investment bank account is £5,000 lighter than it should be. Adam tells him to leave it and he will sort it out in the morning. But Brian is on the scent – the money went missing in March, which was when Alice was working in the office, and Brian is convinced that she is behind this. Again, Adam tries to persuade Brian to let it drop for the moment, but he is adamant; they cannot let her get away with taking the money. Finally, in exasperation, Adam blurts out “Alice didn’t take the money – I did.”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">That was the end of Monday’s episode, so we weren’t privy to what went on after this announcement, but the next day, Adam is explaining the reasons for his actions to Lee. Why Lee, I couldn’t say – perhaps he’s the only person in Ambridge who won’t bit Adam’s head off – but the story told by Adam is that he needed the money to pay the electrician, whose bill for rewiring Honeysuckle Cottage was higher – considerably higher – than the estimate. As such, Adam ’borrowed’ £5 k as a short-term fix and hasn’t got round to repaying it yet. Lee’s advice is to repay the money asap and apologise to Brian – this will demonstrate that he wants to put things right and they can both move on. Adam’s way of thinking is to let Brian stew for a while, but Lee describes this as ‘unhelpful.’</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Am I missing something here? Adam has – let’s not call a spade an manually-operated, earth-inverting, horticultural implement here – embezzled, stolen, purloined (choose your favourite description) and <b>he </b>is going to let Brian stew? If I were Brian, I’d be dialling 999 right now. Adam is upset that Brian practically called him a thief, but how else do you describe someone who takes money that’s not theirs? The point that he intended to return it is academic, surely?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">As it turns out, Adam does get a personal loan from the bank and he tells Brian that he has paid the money back. Brian says “fine” and carries on repairing the bird-proof netting. Adam is nettled by his attitude and points out that Brian was looking at the accounts in the first place to see if he could get an advance on his profit share. Adam adds that he has said ‘sorry’ (which isn’t actually accurate). Brian’s reply is that he would only take money out of the business after telling the other partners, and not just help himself. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I would also make the point that £5,000 is a considerable sum to just let slip your mind, but then again I’m not a farmer and I obviously don’t move in circles where such a sum of money is regarded as petty cash.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The conversation between the two men becomes increasingly acrimonious and Adam asks bitterly why does Brian treat him differently from his siblings? “How am I supposed to treat you when I can’t even trust you?” Brian replies. This is too much for Adam, who spits out “Trust? From the man who dumped another woman’s child on mum?” Brian ignores this and takes it as evidence that Adam feels threatened by Ruairi, plus Brian doesn’t think that he does treat Adam differently from the others.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Adam says that Ruairi is a smart kid, whom Adam loves, but farming for him is just something to occupy the time between school and university, whereas Adam has put his heart and soul into Home Farm. He accuses Brian of not listening to him, but Brian counters that he does listen; he just doesn’t always believe him. Adam is astounded – when it comes to believing his children, Alice has been lying to them all for years, yet Brian chooses not to believe Adam? “Alice is sick.” Brian says.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">In reply, Adam says so is he – sick of being somewhere where he’s not wanted. “So why not leave?” asks Brian. He agrees that the current arrangement isn’t working for either of them, and the last thing Jennifer needs is further upset. Adam is aghast at the thought of leaving Home Farm, but Brian says that, if things continue as they are, he wants Adam out from under his feet: “If I’m going to support your mother and help Alice through the worst time in her life, I need a Farm Manager I can rely on, and it’s becoming increasingly clear that just isn’t you!”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">And there the week ended. Will Adam leave? Where would he go? How thrilled would Ian be? I cannot help but think that, should Adam leave and it became known to Jennifer that this was the result of her husband’s attitude to Adam, then, if I were Brian, I wouldn’t get my goolies too close to any mangle when Jenny is around (in the unlikely event that Home Farm possesses such an implement). But that leaves us with the question who could possibly take over as Farm Manager? Hang on a sec – wasn’t there that guy who went to America? What was his name, now? It will come to me in a second – Rob…Rob Tich-something… no, sorry, it’s gone, I’m afraid…</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-59847869190169119942021-06-15T14:33:00.004+01:002021-06-15T14:33:46.594+01:00Tact Has Never Been The Aldridges’ Strong Suit<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-XdlhdjVAhAQ/YMir-6mYrYI/AAAAAAAACq4/pijEx4Fuia4izzO4xUmsMUC4fYE4e01GgCLcBGAsYHQ/s367/lzjG-rby%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="367" data-original-width="367" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-XdlhdjVAhAQ/YMir-6mYrYI/AAAAAAAACq4/pijEx4Fuia4izzO4xUmsMUC4fYE4e01GgCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/lzjG-rby%2B2.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Barry Farrimond (Ed Grundy)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I think that all the years when Brian and Jennifer Aldridge were acting like they were Lords of the Manor must have gone to their heads. Cast your mind back a few years; they certainly appeared to have it all – swimming pool, a luxury kitchen that would make your average Michelin-starred chef turn green with envy, a wine cellar to die for, and more than sufficient money. Then you poison one little stream and you find yourself in court, having to pay thousands in fines and clear-up fees, your house is sold and you are forced to downsize to a house which isn’t big enough to accommodate your all-singing, all-dancing combine. Life can be cruel. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">How are the mighty fallen! But old habits die hard and they have both retained a surprisingly-high degree of arrogance. This was demonstrated firstly by Jennifer, who sought out Ed and asks if she could talk to him about Alice. Ed is mystified – what can he do? Jen’s reply is along the lines of ‘I don’t understand what Alice is thinking about – I know you were a drug addict once, so can we talk?’ Ed is mightily taken aback by this direct approach, but he eventually invites her in to discuss things.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">First of all, Ed says that, if it hadn’t been for Oliver, he would probably be dead now; there was one day when Ed nearly died from an overdose, but Oliver believed in him, laid down some ground rules and made sure he kept to them. At the time, Ed was homeless and he went to pieces (this was at the time when Emma and George left their caravan and went home to live with Neil and Susan). Ed’s own family disowned him, because of him bedding Emma on the eve of her wedding to Will, and Neil wouldn’t let him in the house.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Despite this sad story, Jenny points out that Ed came through it, which proves that it is possible to beat an addiction, so there may be hope yet. Ed points out that it is easier for some than others – while he was at rock bottom, Alice, by contrast, has everything on a plate; a nice house, a loving husband and a good job, not to mention a baby daughter.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jennifer takes her leave and her next port of call is on Fallon, at the tea shop. Jenny has not yet settled up the bill for the spread that Fallon provided on the day of Martha’s christening. Fallon says that the current situation must be worrying for Jennifer and, upon this, Jenny loses control and bursts into tears, saying how heartbreaking it is to see someone you love slowly destroying herself and shutting friends and family out of their life. Fallon replies that she is sure that Alice never meant to hurt Fallon, but Alice is ill “and ill people need help, don’t they?”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Next day, Brian is working from home and tells Alice that Jennifer has asked if Alice could prepare the meal, as Jen might be late home. Afraid not, says Alice, as she has a table booked at The Fox – she’s going with someone else. Brian almost explodes with anger; he assumes it’s a man. Alice says ‘no’. “So it’s a woman?” Brian says, still shouting. “Well worked out, Dad” replies Alice, and she tells him that the woman is, in fact, Fallon, much to Brian’s amazement.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">On his way to Berrow Farm, Brian calls in on Fallon and asks her what does she think she’s playing at? He calls her ‘deceitful’ and says how could she do this when they are all trying to stop Alice drinking? “And we can do without her so-called friends encouraging her.” With commendable – almost superhuman – restraint, Fallon stops herself giving him a gobfull of fingers (as my partner Louise so delicately phrases it) and tells him to stop right there. This pub visit was not her idea, and was booked in advance by Alice – and surely it’s better for Alice to have someone with her, rather than drink alone?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian moves on to Berrow, in a less-than-happy frame of mind, only to find Neil accompanied by Jazzer – what’s he doing there; he doesn’t start work for a week or two? Neil explains that Jazzer is giving up some free time to see how the farm works, plus he has spent an hour or so helping Neil to re-site the arks, and doesn’t Brian think that that’s very generous of him, seeing as he didn’t <i>have</i> to come in? Brian is in no mood to be generous and confronts Neil with the farm’s performance figures, which he says are simply not good enough. Neil disagrees, but politely so, which contrasts sharply with Brian’s totally grumpy and offensive attitude. Brian stalks off. As he does so, Ed arrives to pick Jazzer up and Neil apologises for Brian’s remarks, “but I suppose we have to make allowances” (personally, I prefer the ‘Louise solution’ mentioned in the previous paragraph). As Neil goes, Jazzer wonders whether, having escaped Home Farm’s Aquaponics operation to work at Berrow, he has jumped from the frying pan into the fire.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">However, has Brian had a Christmas-Carol-Scrooge-Like-Epiphany? Or maybe someone has modified the Louise solution, substituting ‘humble pie’ for ‘a gobfull of fingers’? Whatever, on his way home, Brian drops in on Fallon and offers her an apology “for shooting my mouth off before I knew all the facts” and he now understands why she and Harrison turned down being Martha’s godparents, and he apologises again. Instead of saying ‘OK, who are you and what have you done with the real Brian Aldridge?’, Fallon says that Alice needs professional help, and, when Brian replies that she had that when she was away at the clinic earlier, Fallon says“ she needs REHAB “and she is going to have to want to undergo it.”</p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Just to show that it’s not just strangers to whom the Aldridges are rude, Jenny goes to see Peggy and tells her that Peggy’s example – staying with her alcoholic husband for years – has inspired Brian and Jenny not to give up. Peggy astounds her daughter by saying that she wishes she had given up and walked away and that she knew Alice was an alcoholic as far back as New Year’s Eve. Not only that, but Peggy told Chris that Martha’s safety is of paramount importance and he must do what he can to protect her. Jennifer interprets this as Peggy telling Chris to leave Alice, and Peggy says “if it became necessary, yes.” This is all too much for Jenny, who says that Peggy has made things ten times worse. “I’m sorry, mum,” Jennifer says, “but I don’t see how I’ll ever be able to forgive you.”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Later on, Brian and Jennifer hold a council of war about Rehab – Brian says he’s found a suitable-looking place, and it is eye-wateringly expensive. He also produces a form, which gives them authority to act on Alice’s behalf – all it needs is her signature. Neither parent has mentioned the word ‘Rehab’ to their daughter, and Jenny says they must be tactful with Alice. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ha! In your dreams! This discussion is being held over supper and Alice has just nipped off to the loo. She returns and Brian says they have been talking and he uses the ‘R’ word. Not bad Brian – you held out for all of five seconds there. Alice pours scorn on the very idea, saying that Rehab is for people who want to give up drinking and she doesn’t want to give up. Apparently, the treatment lasts between four to six weeks, and Alice says she couldn’t bear to be away from Martha for that long, to which Mr. Tact Brian says that she doesn’t spend much time with Martha at the moment, anyway.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice then blames Susan for poisoning Chris’s mind against her and turns on her parents – they’ve done precious little to stand up for her. An incensed Brian says “How dare you blame us for this?” and it is all too much for Jennifer, who says she cannot bear it any longer – they are only acting in Alice’s interests and Jen is very afraid that they are going to lose her. “I’m not going anywhere” Alice says, but Jenny explains that she meant that she is afraid that Alice is going to die if she carries on like she is at the moment.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice announces that she is going to her room, and Brian once again demonstrates his caring side and his super-abundance of tact when he calls after her “Another drink? Is that your answer?” Well done Brian - you really know how to handle a difficult situation; I’m surprised you didn’t just nail her to the wall and give her a damn good thrashing.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It’s just another typical evening in the Aldridge household, but there is a surprise in store, as Alice reappears and says “Where is this paper you want me to sign?” “Are you serious?” asks Brian, to which Alice replies that she has brought her own pen, and promptly signs the document of authority. Jennifer is deliriously happy and tells her that she and Brian will be with her every step of the way. “We’ll beat this thing – together” she tells her daughter.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Meanwhile, I expect you are wondering where is Chris while all this is going on? Emma asks Harrison and Fallon if they would be prepared to go out for an evening with her and Chris, as he could do with a change of scene and some company. Fallon isn’t keen, as she fears the evening could end up as a ‘let’s all slag off Alice’ exercise and she points out to Chris that Alice is her friend, as well as Chris. He asks what if he promised it would be an Alice-free event? Not only that, but he would tell Emma to rein in the vitriol about Alice. Rather reluctantly, Fallon agrees.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Things do not bode well, when Emma is detained at an over-running Parish Council meeting. Chris is unusually quiet, and the reason is that this was the place where he took Alice to celebrate her 30<span style="font-size: 9.3px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"><sup>th</sup></span>, and it is bringing back unwanted memories (it was Emma who unwittingly booked the restaurant, by the way). He feels he should phone Susan to check on Martha and that he’d like to go home if they don’t mind. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">As they are on their way, Fallon asks Harrison to pull over and she tells Chris not to be so hard on himself. Harrison agrees, telling Chris that both he and Fallon are there for him. Chris realises that he has gone a bit over the top and says that he doesn’t really need to go home yet. Harrison suggests that the three of them go back to Woodbine, get a chip supper “and watch some rubbish TV.” How could anyone turn down an invitation like that? Not Chris, obviously, as he says “I’d really like that.” I ask you; is it really so surprising that Alice turned to drink? </p><p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-55165463639614696952021-06-08T13:24:00.000+01:002021-06-08T13:24:23.899+01:00Get The Pipe And Slippers Ready For Jazzer<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-T-uOqDs1HLE/YL9hE6WSjxI/AAAAAAAACqg/lk6h13wsObYloRvAV3yj11kizBfaNwk4gCLcBGAsYHQ/s1200/Dmzhnj3XcAAlVbS%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-T-uOqDs1HLE/YL9hE6WSjxI/AAAAAAAACqg/lk6h13wsObYloRvAV3yj11kizBfaNwk4gCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/Dmzhnj3XcAAlVbS%2B2.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Greg Jones (Calvin)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ed and Jazzer are shearing sheep (at Home Farm, I believe) and finding it hot and thirsty work. During a much-needed break, Jazzer admits that he’s finding it hard going this year, and Ed teases him that he must be getting old. Later on, Jazzer tells Ed that he’s thinking of packing the shearing game in – now he’s got a girlfriend, perhaps it’s time he thought about settling down. Ed teases him again and Jazzer challenges him to a shearing contest tomorrow – first one to shear 50, wins a bottle of Sambuca. Come to think of it, I don’t think we were told who won.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Despite the banter, Ed is concerned – who can he get to replace Jazz? Jazzer suggests George and, while Ed says he would love to work with George, he doesn’t know if his nephew would be interested. True that he is studying an agricultural course, but does that mean that he would want to shear sheep?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Actually, it could all be academic, as a couple of days later, Jazzer is giving his motorbike a thorough service and is approached by Tracy, who says that she has always fancied a ride on a motorbike (please insert your own smutty joke) and why don’t the pair take a picnic and find a nice, secluded spot where they can enjoy themselves?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jazzer is definitely up for this, and the pair take off. However, when they arrive at their idyllic destination, all is not sweetness and light; in fact, a blazing row ensues. Tracy, it would appear, is not really a genuine petrolhead, as she accuses Jazzer of trying to kill her and driving like a speed-crazed maniac. For his part, Jazzer asks why didn’t Tracy lean into the corners, as pillion passengers are supposed to do? He calls her a drama queen. Suffice it to say that any chance of romance (or even a quick bit of nookie) is out of the question, as they both agree that this has been the worst date ever.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">But, just when you think things cannot get any worse, they do – Tracy tells Jazzer that there’s no way she is getting back on that bike, and it quickly becomes clear that neither is he, as it refuses to start, so his plan to go back to the main road and flag down somebody to give Tracy a lift is, like the motorbike, a non-starter. So Jazzer rings Eddie and asks if he can rescue them. Sadly, there appears to have been a lack of communication, as Eddie turns up in his limo, much to Tracy’s delight. But not to Jazzer’s – how is he going to get the bike into the limo? The short answer is he isn’t and what’s more, Eddie won’t take him either, as he’s covered in oil and Eddie’s seats are white leather. Eddie will take Tracy home and come back with the van to pick up the bike. And Jazzer.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Meanwhile, back in Ambridge, Mia is alarmed to see Ruairi with a pile of suitcases – surely he’s not leaving the village? No, he explains – he’s just moving in with Adam and Ian for a spell. Mia is relieved. Emma, who was with Mia when they came across Ruairi, notices Mia’s interest in Ruairi and asks if she has a crush on him? If so, Emma wouldn’t tell anyone – Mia can talk to her. After a bit of probing, Mia confesses that she is sweet on Ruairi and she thinks that he feels the same. Emma gently suggests that maybe Ruairi is just being kind, but Mia cannot accept this and says that it is more than just a crush; “I’m in love with Ruairi” she tells Emma.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ruairi is attracting a lot of attention; Adam is watching apprehensively as the mountain of stuff that he is taking to Honeysuckle grows ever higher, but his grumbling is interrupted by Ian, who tells him that he accidentally heard Ruairi on the phone to his friend Troy and their conversation was – well, more than friendly; in fact it was flirty. Adam is stunned – how could he have missed noticing that Ruairi might be gay? He resolves to bring up the subject and let Ruairi know that they will support him, whatever.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It doesn’t take long, as at dinner that evening, Adam drops some unsubtle hints. Ruairi smiles; he knows that they must have overheard him and Troy talking, and he tells Adam and Ian that he’s not gay, but bisexual. Furthermore, Adam talking about how difficult he found it to come out doesn’t apply to Ruairi, as he has never been in the closet in the first place and, while he has never explicitly told Brian and Jenny of his sexuality, it’s not a secret among his friends. He also tells Adam that he and Ian helped pave the way for him and he thanks them for caring – it means a lot. “Well, you’re a lot more sorted than I was at 18” is Adam’s comment.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Perhaps it’s a good job that Mia wasn’t privy to this conversation. She contacts Ruairi and asks if he will show her round Home Farm so she can pursue her one-girl crusade against plastic pollution and waste in the agricultural sector. Sure, says Ruairi; how about now, as his school work is doing his head in. Mia jumps at the chance and, while they are walking the farm, they talk about Alice and her problems and Mia opens up about how she felt when her mum Nic died. Taking her courage in both hands, Mia tells Ruairi that he’s lovely. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Ruairi realises the way that this conversation is leading and he tells Mia that she is lovely too, but quickly adds that he doesn’t feel ‘that way’ about her. Mia recovers brilliantly and bluffs it out, saying of course; she didn’t mean anything else when she said ‘lovely’ – she’s just grateful that he is helping her with her project.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">However, Mia’s dreams and hopes have been shattered and she is despondent. Even Will notices that there’s something amiss and, in that caring but heavy-handed way of his, he keeps asking her questions (‘are you all right?’, ‘do you want to talk?’) The answers in Mia’s case being ‘no’ and ‘no’ and she flees to her room. After a while, an apologetic Will goes to see her and the pair do talk. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">“I didn’t know that having your heart broken could hurt this much” she tells her stepfather, after she has apologised for the rude way she treated him – she knows he was only concerned for her happiness. Will tells her that he knows what it’s like to have your heart broken, but sadly, it’s a part of growing up that almost everybody has to go through – he remembers when a girl he fancied at school got a new boyfriend; Will cried. “I was properly upset” he tells Mia. Mia thinks she will never get over it, but Will assures her that it will get better – he promises. “You just need to let the hurt happen and remember that the whole family loves you” he tells her. “I love them too,” she replies, and her mood lightens ever so slightly.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We come now to the continuing saga of Alice versus the bottle. Thus far, the bottle is way ahead on points and it looks like it was going for a KO this week. Alice returns home to Willow Cottage one evening, decidedly the worse for drink, as she struggles to find her door keys. And she is not alone, as she is accompanied by a young man, whose name, we learn later, is Calvin (although Alice has three goes at remembering it and fails miserably). Calvin and Alice got chatting in a pub and she invited him home for some company. Such is her influence, he is also as pissed as a newt, and the noise they are making wakes up Jennifer.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jennifer says that she has a few things to say and Calvin says that maybe he ought to leave. Alice says no – he’s keeping her company. Jennifer gives it to him straight; her daughter is an alcoholic (Alice is scandalised) and not only that, she also has a husband and a baby daughter. “I didn’t know” mutters Calvin, to which Alice says “It doesn’t matter.” Calvin leaves, which must make him a contender for having the smallest-ever speaking part for an Archers character. “Oh Alice – in God’s name what were you thinking?” Jennifer asks in exasperation.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Enter Brian. What’s been going on? Jennifer starts to relate what has been happening, but Alice warns “Don’t get involved dad – it’s just mum over-reacting as usual.” Brian is bemused – what was his daughter up to? Alice replies that she just wanted some company – is that a crime?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian is still all at sea – if she wanted company, why not turn to Chris and Martha? When Alice asks why, he replies “Because they’re family.” “No they’re not – not any more; I don’t need them” Alice retorts. Brian tells her to stop, but she goes on, saying that she doesn’t need Chris, nor Martha; nor Brian and Jennifer, come to that. “As far as I’m concerned, you can all go to hell!” Alice shouts.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">There is a long silence after this, broken by Brian saying to Alice that she cannot keep on ignoring them – she’s got to try because she and Chris love each other. He thinks back to when she and Chris got married – they thought seriously about taking that step. That’s right, Jenny chips in – surely she doesn’t want to throw away eleven years of marriage? </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">And it is now that Brian utters possibly the most thoughtless comment of his life, when he says “Think about your marriage vows.” There is a moment of silence, then Alice says, in a dangerous voice “Are you serious?” Brian continues and asks her if she wants to throw it all away - her marriage, her relationship with her child? “Did you?” Alice retorts, adding: “I don’t think you’re qualified to lecture anyone on marriage vows” and goes on to mention Siobhan and Ruairi. She calls Brian a hypocrite and says “My vows were the same as those you made to mum – the ones you broke when you knocked up another woman and had a baby with her. It’s true – I lie, I’m selfish and I drink too much; I’m just like you!” A chip off the old block, eh Brian? You must be so proud.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I like to end on a happy note, so let’s go back to the beginning of the week, where Lee is exhausted after looking after Henry and Jack, who seem to have spent all day on Lee’s newly-acquired drum kit. Helen is worried about the noise and invites neighbour Joy over for drinks and nibbles. Helen apologises profusely, but Joy is quite ok about it and says how nice it is to hear the youngsters enjoying themselves and not to worry about the noise and, yes, she will have another drink, thanks for asking. I think we should seriously test Joy’s neighbourliness and her tolerance – I am going to start a rumour that Jazzer is looking to sell his bagpipes and that Lee has expressed a keen interest. Let’s see how she likes that! </p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px; min-height: 16px;"><br /></p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-41816562353739076682021-05-31T17:21:00.000+01:002021-05-31T17:21:34.514+01:00If You Really Loved Her, Vince, You’d Clear Up Your Own Pig Muck<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qhBXW5PpZCo/YLUMv1ozZfI/AAAAAAAACqA/ySDrAOTp1BM1a__0i0AMJe5P4yXrNWrWQCLcBGAsYHQ/s251/Unknown-17.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="251" data-original-width="201" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qhBXW5PpZCo/YLUMv1ozZfI/AAAAAAAACqA/ySDrAOTp1BM1a__0i0AMJe5P4yXrNWrWQCLcBGAsYHQ/s0/Unknown-17.jpeg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Tony Turner (Vince Casey)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Vince Casey is spending a lot of time at Lower Loxley, and Elizabeth is by no means the only centre of attraction, as Vince appears to be developing a relationship with Rex’s pigs. He also seems to be taking Rex under his wing and has lots of ideas to improve Rex’s business, such as suggesting that he purchases industrial fridges. Vince points out to Elizabeth that he has a lot of experience in the meat business – admittedly not pork – and he likes Rex, so why shouldn’t he give the lad a leg up?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Elizabeth reminds him that having pigs at Lower Loxley is <b>her</b> project, so don’t get too involved and she is taken aback somewhat when Vince says that he wants Rex to be successful for Lower Loxley, as it’s his way of showing her that he loves her. Lizzie doesn’t know what to say – she enjoys being with Vince, but can they not continue the way they are, just having a fun time?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">He agrees, and a potentially awkward moment passes. Elizabeth notices that, when he came into the kitchen, he trailed in some pig muck, and she tells him to clean it off his shoe, while she cleans up the kitchen – sounds almost like love to me, Lizzie, but we’ll see how it develops.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The main story last week continued to be about Alice’s battle with the bottle. Actually, ‘battle’ is probably the wrong word, as she always appears to surrender unconditionally after only a few seconds. At least she didn’t smash anybody else’s windows this week, so we should be grateful for small mercies, although local glaziers are disappointed.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">There is a siblings’ meeting at the Dower House when Jennifer, Lilian and Tony get together to discuss the Alice situation. Jennifer admits that she assumed it was all due to the stress of the pregnancy and rather unorthodox birth, but she realises it goes back much further than that. She tells her siblings that the visit they had from Social Services was upsetting, as SocServ seemed to think that Martha might be in danger of being abused. Alice reassured them that she is quite happy with Martha living with Chris and his family at Ambridge View. And what about her – would she like a referral to the Borchester Drug and Alcohol Services? Alice’s answer to that is ‘no thanks’ and Jennifer is in despair, as she says that it looks like Alice doesn’t want to give up drinking and doesn’t seem to be in the least concerned about Martha. Jennifer also says that she doesn’t know where to turn next, as she has come to realise that, when Alice appears to be behaving like the ‘normal’ Alice she remembers, then that means that Alice has been drinking.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jennifer leaves her brother and sister, who continue to debate the situation – it seems hopeless, as Alice will not agree to a detox programme. Tony suggests that perhaps a change of scene might help – does Lilian think that Alice would like to come and spend some time at Bridge Farm? On the ‘1 to 10 scale of good ideas’, this suggestion comes in somewhere around -87. Just try and imagine spending your days in the company of Tony and Pat. No – on second thoughts don’t; I’ve just tried to think about it and I’ve had to go and open a bottle of Scotch, and it’s only 5.30 pm on Saturday, so perhaps not a good idea for Alice?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">From ‘most stupid suggestion’, we move to ‘most stupid question’, as Lilian asks her brother if he thinks she is an alcoholic? She confesses that she encouraged Alice to have a drink when she was pregnant (Alice refused) and goes further, admitting that she regularly drank when she was pregnant with James. All I will say is that, if Lilian isn’t an alcoholic, she’d certainly do if you needed one in a hurry; and, secondly, that answer explains a lot as far as James is concerned…</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We might as well deal with the third sibling; Jennifer. Brian is at home with Ruairi, letting his son watch him change the tractor oil, or something equally spectacular. Ruairi outlines his plan to help deal with the Alice problem – why not let her move into Willow Cottage with Jen and Brian and he can move into Alice’s place, or he can go to live with a couple of college mates? Suddenly, we hear the clinking of numerous glass bottles. ‘Hello, Alice is home’ I thought, but I was mistaken.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">In fact, it was Jennifer. What is she doing? Brian asks – are they his bottles of Rioja? No – they <i>were </i>his bottles of (expensive) Rioja, which she has just emptied down the drain. With commendable restraint, Brian asks for an explanation. Seized by an almost Messianic zeal, Jenny explains that the family is the root cause of Alice’s problem – consider; they have wine with every meal (have you ever had Weetabix with Rioja – other wines and cereals are available?). Call me Mr. Picky, but wouldn’t have been easier and more beneficial (and certainly cheaper) to put a special lock on the wine cellar (or wine cupboard, as the Aldridges have had to downsize) door, thereby keeping valuable wine stocks intact; keeping Alice out, and stopping the Aldridges being prosecuted (again) for polluting the Am, when the Rioja tsunami meets the local watercourse. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jennifer told her siblings earlier that “local gossips are having a field day”. Too right they are! Clarrie gives Helen a list of Alice’s sins – remember how drunk she was at Nic’s funeral? Not to mention how she upset Ed and Emma when she imagined a romance between him and Alice.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Suffice it to say that neither Brian nor Jenny are keen on letting Ruairi move in with his college mates – he might start enjoying himself, Heaven forfend! Brian has a suggestion, and we learn later that his idea is for Ruairi to move in with Adam and Ian – Ian is quite phlegmatic about it, but Adam calls it “a bombshell.”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Before we leave the Alice story, Neil is visiting Shula at the Stables – apparently Banjo’s teeth need filing (I hope to God that Banjo is a horse) – and the pair get talking. Neil admits that Susan is getting run down and that she found the visit from Yvette (social worker) very intrusive. Yvette was, says Neil, very professional and she said that she had no concerns about Martha living at Ambridge View. However, Neil could see the shame in Chris’s eyes throughout the visit.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Personally, Neil doesn’t blame Alice 100%, but it’s different for Susan – she was terrified when the shop window shattered. In answer to Shula’s question, Neil admits that he doesn’t know if Alice and his son will get back together, but part of him thinks that a baby needs her mother, and what would happen if Alice decided that she wanted Martha back? “That would be a hard road for all of us,” Neil says, “Courts, lawyers etc and bad blood between everyone; that’s what I’m afraid of, Shula.”</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Quite often, Neil adds, Chris is so knackered with trying to catch up with work, that he sleeps through the night and Susan has to do the night feeds. That makes Chris feel guilty in the morning, but he won’t open up to anybody, and that upsets Susan even more. Neil and Susan are finding it difficult to talk about the situation and he’s not convinced that there is a right way for any of them to turn at the moment. A sympathetic Shula advises him to stop for a bit – he’s got to look after himself “And it’s hard when you’ve got to be strong for everybody else” she adds.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Let us turn now to Lee and Helen, who (along with Henry and Jack) are moving into Beechwood; Kirsty’s old house. Remember Beechwood? It was Kirsty and Phil’s dream house and Philip had made a number of improvements and additions, as well as decorating it beautifully from top to bottom. How times change! Helen tells Lee to take the boys shopping so that they choose what colours they would like in their rooms. He also resolves to buy an electric drill so that he can fix up a set of shelves and the odd cupboard or two – how hard can it be? Helen is spending a night or two at Bridge Farm, as she has an early start making the latest batch of cheese, so Lee reckons that he can knock the decorating off in a day or so. Philip would turn in his grave – or at least, his cell, if he knew.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Lee soon finds out that things aren’t always as easy as they seem and, when Adam goes round to deliver some furniture that Jennifer is letting them have, a scene of carnage meets his eyes. From being Kirsty’s dream home, Lee has – in only one day – transformed it into what looks like a candidate for ‘Homes under the hammer’ – and I’m talking about the part of the programme before they renovate the property.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Shelves are positioned at interesting angles, plasterboard has holes in it and the colour scheme is funereal, bordering on depressive. Ian, who goes round later to see it, at Adam’s prompting, describes it as “Dracula’s man cave”, but he suggests that the three of them can redecorate it before Helen and the boys return. Adam is not so sanguine – “Are you out of your mind, Ian?” he asks his husband.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Nevertheless, they set to – shelves are taken down and put up again, only this time they are horizontal; holes are filled in, cupboards fixed to the wall properly and the rooms given a complete paint job, but this time not in suicide-inducing colours. All is going swimmingly, then, when inspecting Jack’s room, Ian looks up at the ceiling and emits a gasp of horror. “What on earth possessed you?” Adam asks. “You don’t like it?” Lee replies. “It’s the most hideous thing I’ve ever seen!” Adam replies. So, we’ll mark that down as a ‘no’ then shall we Adam?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">I won’t keep you in suspense – ‘it’ is a stencil of a giant spider, but Lee won’t let Ian paint over it, saying that he wants Jack to decide if he wants to keep it. As it turns out, Jack loves it, saying that it’s a friendly spider and it will look after him. Helen is amazed at the redecoration and praises Lee. “I had some help” he says, modestly. Yeah – like the UK had ‘some help’ from the Americans in WWII.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Later, Helen and Lee are in the garden and she tells him how happy the boys are, and how happy she is. The boys’ happiness, she tells him is that Lee is there to look after them (along with the spider). The pair kiss and Helen says “I think we’re going to be all right here, don’t you?” Normally, such a pronouncement would have us shaking our heads in foreboding as we await the oncoming catastrophe, but I really hope Lee and Helen make a go of it. However, I wonder if a snake has entered this Eden, as Lee has messaged Helen that an old mate of his has decided to get rid of his drum kit and has offered it to Lee (who used to play drums) - how does she feel? Helen tells Ian this and he voices doubts, but she says “I love him, Ian – he’s a wonderful man, and if he wants to play drums, that’s fine by me.” Hmm. I cannot help wondering whether her attitude might change when Jack and Henry start doing Ginger Baker impressions (look him up if you’re too young to remember) at six o’clock on a Sunday morning. </p><div><br /></div>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5239961272503302163.post-26527599758990095412021-05-25T13:57:00.000+01:002021-05-25T13:57:12.136+01:00Alice Has A Smashing Time At The Shop!<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8Y2rDmfPdcA/YKzz60lOXfI/AAAAAAAACp4/63TOIQdE1ogFcJzgSg6O2E01YiL2pj_WgCLcBGAsYHQ/s655/p0165hcw%2B2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="655" data-original-width="655" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8Y2rDmfPdcA/YKzz60lOXfI/AAAAAAAACp4/63TOIQdE1ogFcJzgSg6O2E01YiL2pj_WgCLcBGAsYHQ/s320/p0165hcw%2B2.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px;">Hollie Chapman (Alice Carter)</b></div><p></p>
<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">People are still walking on eggshells around Alice. In conversation with her mother, Emma says that she looks exhausted. No wonder! Susan says that Alice came to see them yesterday and she got very upset because Martha wouldn’t stop crying, but at least Alice appears to be trying (very trying, if you ask me).</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">At Berrow Farm the next day, Brian and Neil are talking. Brian lets it be known that he was less than impressed when Emma rocked up on his doorstep and began bad-mouthing Alice. Neil knew nothing of this, but it hasn’t changed his point of view – he won’t leave Martha alone with Jennifer and Alice. Brian, who seems to have a blind spot when it comes to his youngest daughter, describes Alice as “very resilient” (sounds better than ‘a total lush’ I suppose). The two men wonder how this situation has got to this point, and Neil tells his boss that the Carters have always looked on Alice as their own daughter, but Martha is their priority now.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Be that as it may, neither Susan nor Neil are getting any younger and the strain of looking after a new-born baby is taking its toll, with Susan doing most of the night feeds. So it is that Shula confronts (in a nice way) Susan in the shop; Peggy (and Jill, and many others) have received letters saying that their newspaper bills have not been paid, and intimating that their goolies will be put in the mangle if they don’t settle up pronto. The problem is that all these people have all paid up to date and the letters have been sent out as an oversight. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Susan is distraught and asks Shula to apologise to those members of her family who have been unfairly smeared – she must have pressed the wrong button. It’s difficult to get Martha into a routine, explains Susan. Shula asks if perhaps Susan should take a break from the shop, but Susan replies that she just needs to concentrate a bit harder.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Meanwhile, Neil has returned to Ambridge View to relieve Emma from Martha Watch duties. Emma goes off on one about Brian Aldridge and Neil reminds her that Brian is his boss, and Emma’s attitude and actions haven’t really helped very much. In fact, he tells her to stop – she’s only making things worse and, before she opens her mouth in the future, she should ask herself if what she says is really going to help improve the situation? They need to be constructive. Emma replies that it won’t be easy to disguise her feelings about Alice – or Kate, come to that. Neil thanks his daughter for her help in looking after Martha today and says that he knows it won’t be easy – in fact, it’s breaking his heart.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">We shouldn’t assume that Alice is not seeing her daughter while all this is going on. In fact, on Tuesday, we see Alice and Chris at Ambridge View with Martha. Alice keeps remarking about things that their daughter is doing for the first time, only to be told by Chris that she has been doing them for a couple of weeks. Chris won’t leave Alice alone with Martha, despite the fact that Alice insists that she has changed. “What? Since the christening?” asks a sceptical Chris.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice starts to get bolshie and says that she cannot stand the way Chris is watching her like a hawk all the time. She suggests that she is not entirely to blame for the current situation, as both she and Chris were fond of nights out, fuelled by plenty of drink – it was only her that got ill (nice euphemism there, Alice). “But you are still ill” replies Chris, and an argument ensues, with Alice claiming that he wants her to fail; “Now you’ve got Martha, you don’t need me any more” she says. Chris’s response to this is to ask his wife if she is mad; has she had a drink today? He tells her to go – now. Alice says that her time with Martha isn’t up yet, to which a snarling Chris replies that she can see her daughter only when he says she can, and please go.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">This episode has been witnessed by Jennifer (who can spy on Ambridge View from Willow Cottage) and who is relaying what’s going on to Peggy, who is on the phone. I tell you, GCHQ has got nothing compared to the Ambridge gossip network. Jennifer isn’t really listening, and keeps going on about, had the family known the extent of the problem, then they might have nipped it in the bud. Peggy, who points out that she has had some experience of alcoholism with her first husband, says that this would have been unlikely. She then tries to tell Jennifer that she already knew that Alice was an alcoholic, but Jennifer has spotted Alice leaving Ambridge View in floods of tears and says that she has to hang up.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">While all this is going on, Susan turns up late for work and apologises to Helen. Helen is disturbed, as she notices that Susan is shaking and has obviously been crying – is she fit to drive? Susan says yes, but Helen isn’t having any of it and says that she will drive Susan home and she insists that Susan takes time off with compassionate leave. In a small voice, Susan asks if she ought to resign – she knows she has not been doing a good job recently. Helen rejects the thought out of hand and tells Susan to take some time out and focus on her family – they are what’s important. This leaves Helen with a staffing problem, as she tells Kirsty later. Kirsty says get someone else in, but Helen replies that there are no guaranteed hours or any length of contract, so who would be mad enough to take a job like that?</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">The answer is staring Helen in the face, says Kirsty – she will do it. She’s twiddling her thumbs at Grey Gables at the moment and she is sure that Clarrie can explain what needs to be done. Kirsty might have thought ‘and if Clarrie and Susan can do the job, how hard can it be?’ but she never voiced the thought. Helen is worried that she is taking advantage of her friend, but Kirsty says that she wants paying. “In that case, when can you start?” Helen asks.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">‘But what happened to Alice – where did she go?’ I hear you scream. The short answer is ‘to the shop’, where Jim is serving behind the counter. Alice, who has obviously had a sniff of the barmaid’s apron – well, several sniffs, actually – is trying to persuade Jim to sell her a bottle of vodka. And if he doesn’t, then she will get in her car and drive to somewhere where they <i>will </i>sell her a bottle. Jim asks whether she would take a risk like that with her safety, and that of other road users, and the answer is ‘yes’. In that case, Jim has to decide whether it’s better for her to have the bottle, rather than risk an accident.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">In the end, he thinks the former course of action is the preferred option, so it is a tad unfortunate that Susan enters the shop just as he is handing the booze over. “Jim – Alice. What do you think you’re doing!” Susan says, aghast. A three-way argument breaks out, with Jim trying to justify his action, Alice screaming to be given the bottle and Susan telling Jim to shut up and mind his own business. “Can’t you see what this is doing to you?” Susan asks Alice, only to be called “an interfering hypocrite” in response. Susan loses patience and tells Alice to get out of the shop – she will not serve her alcohol. As Alice storms out, Jim tells Susan that she handled the situation very well, but he is interrupted by the sound of breaking glass.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Let’s pause here for a moment – we are told, next day, that Alice threw a brick through the shop window, and then went back into the shop to see if Jim and Susan were OK. Personally, I reckon she went back to see if she could liberate the Voddie bottle, but that’s just me. What we do know is that somebody called the Police, but what I want to know is where did Alice get the brick from? I mean, you don’t see bricks laying around the place, do you? I cannot believe that Alice carries bricks around for just such an eventuality. </p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Leaving that aside, the following morning Alice has been told to report to the Police Station at 8.50. Brian and Jennifer have gone with her and Brian is getting arsey about the length of time that his daughter has been detained – should he go in and stir them up? he asks Jennifer.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Jenny was obviously ahead of Brian in the queue when Common Sense was being handed out, as she suggests that it might be counterproductive to antagonise the police in the execution of their duties. Fortunately, Alice reappears and says that they can go home. She offered to pay for the window (offered Brian to pay, more like). There is just a slight complication, in that, should Jim or Susan want to press charges, things will be taken further.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Alice goes round to see Jim to apologise, but Jazzer sends her away with a flea in her ear, telling her that “Martha needs a decent Ma – and you’re not it.” When Jim learns of this, he gently chides Jazzer, saying that he should be more understanding and sympathetic. Jazzer puts this attitude down to delayed shock and keeps trying to get Jim to drink hot, sweet tea.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">Brian goes to see Neil and offers to pay for the new glass and any clean-up costs (told you so!). He takes the opportunity to suggest that, as neither Susan nor Jim were not seriously hurt, perhaps they won’t be pressing charges? After all, if that were to happen, it could seriously knock back any progress that Alice has made. Neil puts on his stern voice and says “Brian, we all want Alice to get over this, but you have to draw the line somewhere.” He adds that the decision is Susan’s, but he will back her, whatever she decides.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">It turns out that Neil goes to see Jenny and Alice, to tell them that Susan said that, while it was a nasty experience, she feels that punishment won’t help in this case. The shop committee would like to accept Brian’s offer to pay for the clear-up. Just then, the phone rings and Jenny goes to answer it. Alice says that she feels that she deserves to be punished and Neil wonders out loud “Where has she gone – that beautiful girl we all loved so much?” He adds that, if they all work together, maybe they can get her back, and then takes his leave.</p>
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<p style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS"; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;">If the Aldridges think that this draws a line under the situation, then it appears that they are sadly mistaken, as a shocked and worried Jennifer returns from answering the phone and gives her daughter the somewhat upsetting news that it was Social Services on the other end. And so another week’s episodes end.</p>Neilhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00769999417516528755noreply@blogger.com0